Sweet Serendipity
by BDavis427
Summary: She left and never looked back. He had been hurt in the past and had never gotten over it. Their lives change the day they meet each other making them realize that sometimes what you need the most comes from where you least expect it.
1. Macaroni and Cheese

Chapter One: Macaroni and Cheese

She left and never looked back. That town held too many memories of him and of them and who she used to be. She still kept in touch with the people she grew up with and at times it killed her to be on the opposite coast so far away from them but she couldn't go back. Los Angeles was so different from Tree Hill. All the girls looked like Barbie and all the guys looked like Ken; she didn't fit in and she knew that. She had moved there six months ago, a few weeks after her world had come crashing down. At first, her friends had thought she went there to get away from everything for a little bit and to clear her head but she had decided to stay. She had told them it would be too hard for her to return and try to go back to living a normal life when every single place she went reminded her of him.

She had once been bubbly and vivacious and full of life but that all went away six months ago. He had encouraged her to go after her dream of opening her own restaurant where she was the head chef but all that changed six months ago too. Now, she was waiting tables at a small café near the apartment building in which she lived. She was struggling to get by and she was two months late on the rent but the landlord was a nice older woman who told her not to worry about it. As she strolled through the park one sunny afternoon she never imagined it would be the day her life would completely change…again.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

He had been hurt in the past and he had never gotten over it. He was bitter and resentful and every time he looked at his daughter he couldn't help but see the woman who had left them behind because she wasn't ready to be a mother at nineteen. He wasn't ready to be a father at nineteen either but he didn't abandon his child like she had. He loved his daughter more than anything but he didn't know how to show it so he buried himself in his work. His mother and father had pretty much raised his daughter and he was grateful for that because god only knows how she would have turned out if he had raised her. Granted, she was only five years old and she still had a lot of growing up to do but they had taught her right from wrong and all that other important stuff from the very beginning. She was polite and funny and the best little girl in the world...or so he was told.

He didn't know her favorite color. He didn't know her favorite food. He didn't know if she slept with a nightlight or in the dark. He didn't know his daughter. His parents took her on the weekends and on Wednesdays when the nanny of the week had her day off. He left in the morning before she was up and returned late at night when she was already asleep. He was amazed his daughter even knew who he was since he was never around, he wanted to change that but he didn't know how.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

She saw her sitting on a park bench crying. The little girl reminded her so much of herself when she was that age. She had long chestnut hair that curled at the ends. She was dressed in a green sundress with white sandals. She was a beautiful little girl minus the tears. She looked around to see if the little girl's parents were around but she didn't see anyone so she cautiously walked over toward the girl.

"Hi, sweetie," she said as she knelt in front of her. "Where's your mommy or daddy?"

The little girl shrugged. "Daddy's at work. Sarah was supposed to be watching me but I can't find her."

"Who's Sarah?"

"My nanny." The little girl sniffled. "I'm scared."

"I know, sweetheart, but Sarah has to be around here somewhere." She said as she looked around the park.

"Grandpa says I'm not supposed to talk to strangers." She said quietly as she kneaded her hands together. "You're a stranger."

"I am." She nodded. "But how about if I tell you a little about myself while we sit here and wait for Sarah? Then I won't really be a stranger anymore."

The little girl hesitated for a moment before nodding. "Okay."

"Well, my name's Brooke and I'm twenty-four years old." She started. "I used to live in a small town called Tree Hill and it was in North Carolina before I moved here about six months ago. When I was little like you I used to have a nanny too."

The little girl's eyes widened. "You did?"

Brooke nodded. "But most of the time they couldn't handle my mother and her bad attitude so they left. I felt like I had a different nanny every week."

"I do." She said sadly. "Today was Sarah's first day since Amelia quit. I don't think any of them like me and that's why they quit or leave me in the park."

"You've been left in the park before?" Brooke asked as her eyes widened.

She nodded. "This is the third time. It was really scary the first time but not anymore since I'm used to it. Why don't they like me?"

"I'm sure they love you, sweetie." Brooke said as she wrapped her arm around the small girl. "What do you say we call the police so they can help get you home?"

A short while later after the police had taken all the information they needed, they were getting ready to take the little girl back to her house when she started calling for Brooke.

"I don't want to go by myself." She cried from the backseat of the cruiser.

"You're not by yourself, you have these nice two policemen who are going to bring you back home and stay with you until your daddy gets home from work." Brooke explained.

"He comes home really late. The policemen are strangers." She said.

"So am I." Brooke pointed out.

She shook her head. "No you're not. You're Brooke and you used to live in Tree Hill before you moved here six months ago and you used to have a lot of different nannies just like me. You're not a stranger."

Brooke smiled before looking at the police officers. "Do you mind?"

Both of them shook their heads and Brooke thanked them before sliding into the backseat of the cruiser. "So, are you going to tell me your name now?"

She giggled. "Olivia."

"That's a really pretty name." Brooke said as the cruiser pulled out of the parking lot and began to make its way back to where Olivia lived. "I bet your dad is proud that you know all the important information to give to a police man in this kind of a situation."

"My grandma and grandpa taught me it. My daddy is never around, I hardly ever see him because he's always working." Olivia said sadly.

"I bet he wished he didn't have to work so he could spend every day with you instead of at his job." Brooke said.

Olivia shrugged. "I don't know. He really likes his job."

Brooke felt terrible for Olivia. She knew how it felt to grow up in a household where your parents are never around and care more about their job than their own child. "So, what do you feel like having for lunch when we get home?" She asked trying to change the subject.

"Macaroni and cheese." She smiled. "It's my favorite food."

"Mine too!" Brooke agreed. "I could eat it all day every day."

"I could too but grandma tells me that if I do noodles will come out of my ears!"

"She's right," Brooke nodded. "It happened to me."

"No way!" Olivia squealed.

"Way. Now I can only eat macaroni and cheese once a week or else noodles will spill out of my ears again."

"We're home." Olivia said when the cruiser stopped in front of a sprawling mansion in suburban Beverly Hills.

"Wow." Brooke said as she stared out the window. "You live here?"

Olivia nodded. "Just daddy, the nanny and me; grandma and grandpa live down the street."

Brooke thanked the police officers before Olivia pulled her away and toward the house. To her surprise, Olivia knew exactly where the spare key was hidden and she knew how to unlock the door too. "How old did you say you were again?" Brooke laughed.

Olivia smiled as she held up five fingers. "I'm really smart for my age. Daddy sends me to the bestest private school in all of California." She said proudly as she pushed the heavy oak door open. "I'll be right back." She said as she scurried up the staircase.

Brooke was floored when Olivia opened the door. She felt her jaw drop as she stepped inside and into the foyer. The house was immaculate and it was by far the biggest house she had ever been in or even seen for the matter. It really didn't look like anyone lived in the house because it was so clean, neat and orderly. She wondered how the house was kept so clean with a five-year-old living in it but she figured there were house cleaners, a butler and a chef who all lived in the house to keep it in shape. There was a grand staircase that led upstairs right when she walked in the door and she could hear Olivia slamming dresser drawers closed. A large ornate crystal chandelier hung in the foyer and the crystals twinkled in the sunlight casting prisms onto all the surrounding walls. To the left was a big room that looked to Brooke to be a living room but she wasn't sure just how much living was actually done in it since it was so proper looking. She could see what looked to be the kitchen was further in the house and past the living room. Off to the right was the formal dining room where the table looked to have enough room and chairs to seat at least twenty people. "All changed!" Olivia announced as she bounded down the elaborate staircase in a Cinderella nightgown.

"Ready for some mac n' cheese?" Brooked asked as she reached for Olivia's hand. She nodded and took her hand as she led Brooke into the kitchen where her jaw dropped again. This kitchen was a culinary artist's dream and Brooke was in heaven as she ran her fingertips along the smooth granite countertops and looked at all of the state of the art appliances. "Does your dad like to cook?" she asked.

Olivia giggled. "Daddy doesn't know how to cook, he burns everything! Marco, our chef, cooks everything. Today is his day off."

"Well," Brooke smiled. "You're in luck because I can cook pretty well and I've been told that my homemade macaroni and cheese is the best in the whole world."

Olivia crinkled her nose. "Homemade? Can't you just make it from the box like my grandma does?"

"I could," Brooke said as she looked around for a pot. "But I'm going to make this one and you're going to love it, I promise." She smiled.

"If you say so." Olivia giggled.

They talked as Brooke made the macaroni and cheese from scratch. Every so often she'd earn a questioning look from Olivia as she put different ingredients in like spicy mustard. "Are you sure you're supposed to put that in there?" Olivia asked as she peered into the pot.

"Trust me." Brooke grinned. As she continued to listen to Olivia tell her all about kindergarten and what she was learning Brooke couldn't help but feel a little out of place. This was not how she had envisioned her day when she set out to go for a walk earlier in the morning. Olivia had taken an instant liking to her but she still felt strange being in a stranger's house with his child, but at the same time being around Olivia felt natural and she liked it. She could tell Olivia liked spending time with her too which made her smile a little wider.

"So what should I do?"

Brooke looked up at Olivia who was staring at her with waiting eyes. "I'm sorry, what should you do about what?"

She groaned. "You weren't listening! Tyler at school told me he liked me under the slide last week but around his friends he's really mean to me. I don't know what to do."

Brooke turned the stove down and placed the lid on top of the pot. "He's scared to show his friends how he really feels so that's why he acts the way he does." She said as she leaned forward and rested her elbows on the counter. "I think you should ignore him until he starts acting nice to you in front of everybody because eventually he's going to get tired of being mean to you and realize that if he's nice you'll play with him again."

Olivia smiled. "You're really smart about boys."

"I've had a few years of experience." She laughed.

"Is the mac n' cheese done yet?" Olivia asked as she tried to look into the pot.

"Almost," Brooke said. "Why don't you go and wash your hands and get some plates and forks out and by then it should be ready to eat."

Olivia leaped down from her seat and scurried into the bathroom only to return a few moments later. "All done!" She announced proudly as she held up her hands for Brooke to inspect.

"Good girl." She said as she scooped some of the macaroni onto a plate for Olivia. "Why don't you sit at the counter?" She suggested.

"I have a better idea of where we can eat." Olivia smirked as she reached for her plate. She waited for Brooke to scoop some macaroni for herself before leading her further into the house. She stopped in front of two more heavy oak doors and smiled before pushing them open.

Brooke's jaw dropped. Before her was a standard sized movie theater that belonged at the local cinema, not somebody's house. "Are you kidding me?" She asked in disbelief.

Olivia shook her head. "We also have a bowling alley, an indoor and outdoor swimming pool and a merry-go-round."

Brooke stared at the little girl. "It's like you live in the White House."

"Our house is tan." Olivia said matter-of-factly.

She couldn't help but laugh. "Okay, so what movie do you want to watch?"

"Henry's already taking care of it." She responded as she pointed to a man in the back of the theater that smiled and waved. "He's in charge of the movie theater."

Olivia definitely had more than a lot of other five year olds but she didn't act like she did. She didn't act spoiled or entitled. She wasn't bratty or mean. Brooke wondered if she had been born into wealth or if it was new to her and her father. As they settled into the seats in the theater, the screen sprang to life and Cinderella began to play before them. Olivia fell asleep about half-way into the movie. Brooke took her empty plate and set it on the floor before taking off her sweatshirt and draping it over the small girl's body. She felt funny sitting in the movie theater watching Cinderella. She felt like a child but she liked it.

The movie finished and Brooke carried Olivia up the stairs in search of the little girl's room. Upstairs there were dozens of closed doors, something Brooke was not expecting. How big of a house did a man and his daughter need? To her surprise, Olivia's room was not hard to find; it had a pink _O_ hanging on the door. She pushed it open and walked over to the bed before gently laying Olivia down. She pulled up the covers and lightly kissed her forehead before turning to leave.

Downstairs she felt out of place. Olivia wasn't there with her and she was just standing in the middle of a stranger's kitchen. She was dreading the moment Olivia's father walked through the front door because she wasn't sure what she was going to tell him. She began to pace back and forth in the kitchen thinking of what to say when she had enough. She opened the refrigerator and pulled out several different things. She opened cabinets and retrieved pots and pans. She cooked when she was stressed; it calmed her down and made her feel in control. She was so consumed with cooking that she didn't hear him walk in and didn't know he was standing in front of her until he cleared his throat causing her to jump.

"Oh!" She exclaimed when she saw him. "I uh- I'm Brooke." She said as she extended a flour coated hand.

The man looked around his kitchen. She had cooked and baked enough for a small army. "Julian Baker." He said warily as he shook her hand before wiping his on a towel. "Who are you?"

She stopped stirring and looked up at him. "I'm Brooke Davis. I found your daughter in the park this morning. She said her nanny Sarah just left her there."

"Why are you still here?"

Brooke didn't like the man's tone. "She was scared and didn't want to be by herself. Aren't you concerned about your daughter?"

He nodded. "I got the message from the police department and that's why I'm here."

"Six hours _after_ they called you." Brooke pointed out.

"I have a very demanding job. I'm sorry I wasn't able to come home the second I found out about Olivia. I knew that the police were equipped to handle the situation and that she'd be okay. This has happened before, you know."

"I know." Brooke nodded. "Don't you think there's a problem with the nannies you hire?"

He shrugged. "Maybe."

"Don't you think you should hire a nanny who cares about your daughter and won't leave her alone in the park? Olivia told me today that she doesn't feel loved or cared about by any of the nannies who have taken care of her in the past. She doesn't like them and she knows that they don't care about her. That's a little sad if you ask me."

"I didn't ask you." Julian said as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Clearly the two of you hit it off today."

"We did," Brooke smiled proudly. She had only known Olivia for a few hours but she already loved that little girl. "She's a great kid."

"That's what I hear." He replied as he glanced around the kitchen. "So, who's going to clean up this mess?"

Brooke's face reddened. "I'll take care of it and then I'll be out of your way." The man obviously wasn't a people person and Brooke didn't feel welcome in his home. She had gone out of her way to be nice to his daughter and he had been rude to her from the second he walked into the kitchen.

Julian stayed in the kitchen as she cleaned it. She had hoped he would offer to help but he didn't. Instead, he sat at the table and was eating the apple pie she had made from scratch. "Okay," She said once she had finished. "I'm going to leave now. I hope you enjoy all this food." She said as she motioned around the kitchen. "Tell Olivia I enjoyed her company today and I'm going to miss her."

Julian nodded toward the door. "Okay."

Brooke shook her head. She couldn't believe how different Olivia was from her father. "Bye." She said quietly as she reached for her coat. Her hand was on the door knob when she heard him call her name. Seconds later he came running into the foyer and placed his hand on the heavy oak door in an effort to stop her from leaving.

"I need a new nanny."

Brooke stared at him. "I don't think I'm qualified to do something like that." She said as she shook her head.

"Neither were the previous ten I hired to take care of Olivia." He said. "Hearing you talk about my daughter the way you were I can tell you care about her and you've only known her for a couple hours."

"I don't know," She hesitated.

"I'll pay you five thousand a week." He offered.

Her jaw dropped. "I don't want that kind of money, that's way too much to pay a nanny."

"Not if I can afford it." He shook his head. "Brooke, please."

"Drop it down to one thousand a week and I'll do it."

He blinked. "You're seriously asking me to decrease your pay?"

She nodded. "I don't need that kind of money, Julian. I'd do this job for free if it weren't for the fact that I have a car payment and rent and food to pay for."

"Okay," He said as he shook his head. "One thousand a week it is."

She smiled proudly. "Okay."

"Can you start tomorrow?" He asked.

She nodded. "What time?"

"I leave at six and my parents are here to wake her up and get her dressed and onto the bus. But, if you wanted to be here tomorrow morning when they do that so they can get you into the routine that would be great. Say around six-thirty? Olivia won't wake up until about seven."

She nodded. "Sounds good."

He smiled as he opened the door for her. "See you tomorrow, Brooke."

"Bye." She replied as she walked down the steps.

He closed the door behind her and leaned against it. A smile spread across his face as he thought about what had just happened. He suddenly heard a knock on the door.

"I just realized I don't have a car. The police dropped us off." She smiled meekly.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a key. "Take the silver one in the driveway." He said as he tossed her the key. "It's yours now, by the way."

"Seriously?"

Julian nodded. "I picked it up today as a thank-you from me for taking care of Olivia today."

She shook her head. "It really wasn't that big of a deal. I mean I don't need a car as a gift or a reward, I didn't do it because I wanted something I –"

"Stop it." He interrupted. "You took care of my daughter and made her feel safe. This is the least I can do."

Brooke started the car and pulled out of the long driveway. She couldn't believe the day she had had. Her life had just completely changed but this time she had a feeling it was for the better. She didn't know what to think of Julian. He had been a jerk when he first came home but he had just given her a brand new car as thank you for taking care of his daughter for a couple hours. He was an attractive man but she couldn't let herself go there. She wasn't ready yet; she still missed him and feared she would never be ready to move on. The next day would be interesting…she had no idea what it took to be a nanny but she was excited. She was looking forward to tomorrow; something she had stopped looking forward to the night of the accident.

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Review please!


	2. Apple Pie

Chapter Two: Apple Pie

She arrived back at Julian's house fifteen minutes early the next day. Her stomach was in knots and her palms were sweaty. She wasn't sure why she was so nervous but she wanted Julian to like her and more importantly she wanted Olivia to like her. She knew what it was like to have a nanny who didn't care and she didn't want to be that kind of nanny to Olivia. She took several deep breaths before opening the car door. An older man met her at the door with open arms which completely took her by surprise.

"You must be Brooke," He smiled as he wrapped her in a hug. "I'm Paul, Julian's father."

"Hi," She replied as she awkwardly hugged him back. "How are you?"

"Paul," She heard an older woman scold. "Let the poor girl go. You're scaring her." A few seconds later a woman appeared from the kitchen wiping her hands on a towel. "Hi dear, I'm Diane."

Brooke greeted Julian's mother with a small hug and a smile. The three of them stood in the foyer awkwardly until Diane suggested they go to the kitchen for some breakfast. Marco had whipped up egg sandwiches that Brooke had found delicious. She noted that there were bites missing from everything she had cooked the previous evening which made her grin.

"So," Diane started. "Usually we're not here to take care of Olivia in the morning except on Wednesdays when you have your day off—"

"I don't need a day off." Brooke interjected.

Paul raised his eyebrows. "Really?"

She nodded.

Paul glanced over at his wife and smiled. "First you ask Julian to decrease your pay and now you're saying you'll work seven days a week? Either you're crazy or you love being a nanny."

"Oh, I've never been a nanny before."

"What did you do before?"

"I was a chef." She said as she glanced over at Marco. "It wasn't anything special, just a friend's local restaurant. I had planned on opening up my own but a lot of things happened in my personal life that has now made that dream nearly impossible." She blushed realizing she was beginning to ramble. "Sorry."

Diane reached out and placed her hand on top of Brooke's. "It's fine, dear." She smiled kindly. "Now, back to Olivia. Usually she's up by about seven. Marco makes her breakfast and we sit and talk with her before she goes upstairs to shower. She has a school uniform so you don't have to worry about picking out an outfit. We leave the house by 8:30 to make sure she's at school by 8:45 because attendance and being punctual count toward her final grade. Then, from 9 to 3 you have the day to yourself to do whatever you please. Make sure you're on time to pick her up at 3 because she doesn't like being the last kid there. Marco has a snack waiting for her when she gets home from school and we try to start her homework by about 3:30 so she's done by 4. From 4 to 5:30 you two can do whatever but dinner is always served at 5:30 sharp. After dinner she usually does her own thing, sometimes a movie sometimes we watch her while she swims. As long as she's happy we're happy. At 8 we start to get ready for bed and that usually brings us to 8:30 when we read her a story and she falls asleep by the third page. Julian is home by about 10 or 11 and then you get to go home, go to sleep and then come back and do it all over again the next day." Diane smiled. "I know it's a lot to take in all at once which is why I typed up exactly what I just told you and hung it on the fridge." She pointed.

Brooke nodded. She was overwhelmed and confused. Julian didn't eat dinner with his daughter? She wasn't awake when he left in the morning and she was fast asleep when he came home. When did he spend time with Olivia? She was surprised when she saw Diane and Paul reaching for their coats. "Where are you going?" She asked.

Paul smiled. "You're here now, we don't have to be. We have to meet Diane's sister for brunch anyway. Call us if you need us."

The door slammed shut and she was alone in the stranger's house yet again. Diane and Paul had been much nicer than Julian when she first met them but they were in just as much a hurry as he had been last night. It seemed like no one really spent quality time with Olivia when they had other things to do. She walked over to the schedule that hung on the refrigerator and shook her head. Everything was so scheduled; there was no room for error or spontaneity. She wondered if Olivia liked that; she was probably so used to it that she didn't know any different. She glanced at the schedule one last time before ripping it down and crumpling it in her hand before tossing it in the trash. Marco stared at her with wide eyes. "You have the day off, Marco." She smiled. "I can take care of all the cooking."

"I don't think you have the authority to do that Miss Davis." Marco said as he shook his head. "I don't think Mr. Baker will appreciate it."

Brooke shrugged. "It'll be our little secret. Mr. Baker will never know."

Marco smiled. "Okay." He said simply. "Thank you, Miss Davis."

She watched as he quickly gathered his things and hurried toward the door as if she was going to yell just kidding and make him work all day. She knew it was her first day and she definitely didn't have the authority to let Marco have the day off but she didn't care. She glanced at the clock and realized it was a little before seven so she started making her way toward Olivia's room.

Olivia was in the same position she had been the night before when she had tucked her in. The little girl stirred slightly when Brooke gently laid her hand on her shoulder. "Wake up," Brooke said softly. "It's time to get ready for school."

Olivia's eyes shot open at the sound of Brooke's voice. "What are you doing here?" She asked excitedly. "Are you my new nanny?"

Brooke smiled and nodded. "Your daddy asked me last night when he came home if I wanted the job and I said yes. Are you happy about that?" She asked warily.

Olivia nodded her head. "Yes!" She squealed. "You're going to be the best nanny ever!"

She smiled. "Do you want me to go start the shower for you while you get your uniform ready?"

Olivia looked confused. "I usually eat breakfast before I get ready. And, I don't know how to take showers. I take baths."

"Okay," Brooke nodded. "We can eat first and then I can help you take a bath."

She shook her head. "I like your way better. Then I don't have to rush to get ready."

Half an hour later, Olivia was bathed and dressed and walking down the stairs with Brooke on their way to the kitchen for breakfast. "Where's Marco?" Olivia asked when they walked into the kitchen. "Is he sick?"

Brooke shook her head. "I told him he could have the day off. I'm fully capable of cooking for you and your dad."

"Can you make French toast?"

She nodded.

Olivia smiled. "Will you make French toast?"

She went to work making breakfast for Olivia. She knew for the most part where everything was considering she had spent so much time the previous night cooking in the kitchen. Olivia talked her ear off as she prepared the food but this time Brooke made sure to pay attention in case she asked for advice again.

"So," Brooke said as she placed a piece of toast on a plate and handed it to Olivia. "Do you like school?"

She nodded her head eagerly as she dumped powdered sugar and syrup all over the piece of toast. "I love it! Miss Danielle is the bestest teacher ever!"

Brooke sat down next to her at the counter and began eating her French toast. "What's your favorite part of the school day?"

Olivia didn't hesitate. "Spanish and French time."

Her eyes bulged. "You know Spanish and French?"

Olivia nodded. "And this year we just started learning German but it's harder than Spanish and French, I think."

"Wow," It was all Brooke could say. This little girl clearly knew more than she did and she felt intimidated for some reason. "How do you like your French toast?"

She smiled. "It's the greatest!"

Half an hour after that they were pulling out of the driveway in the car Julian had given Brooke the night before. Olivia was talking nonstop from the backseat as Brooke drove down the suburban streets of Beverly Hills. The drive she had to make from her place to Julian's house took about an hour and she wasn't sure how long it would take before she tire of the drive. She made a mental note to look for apartments that were closer to his place when she got back home. She pulled into the school parking lot and saw parents walking their children into the building. She wondered if Olivia wished it was her dad driving her to school instead of her.

"Am I supposed to walk you in?" Brooke asked as she looked at Olivia through the rearview mirror.

She nodded. "All my other nannies didn't but they were supposed to. Miss Danielle got mad at them."

Brooke turned the car off and got out to help Olivia out of the car seat. She was surprised when Olivia reached for her hand and smiled up at her. "What are you going to do today?" She asked Brooke.

She shrugged. "I don't know. Do you know what your other nannies used to do when you were at school?"

Olivia giggled. "I was at school. How am I supposed to know?"

"Well, then, I guess I'll just have to figure it out on my own." She grinned.

Olivia placed her backpack in one of the cubby holes before turning around to face Brooke who was taking everything in. All the children looked the same in their uniforms and they were by far the most well behaved five year olds she had ever seen. Olivia caught Brooke by surprise when she wrapped her little arms around her legs and squeezed tight. "See you at three!" She smiled up at her.

Brooke crouched down to the little girl's height. "I hope you have a good day and I packed a special treat in your lunch."

Olivia gasped. "What is it?"

"You're going to have to wait until lunchtime to find out." Brooke said as she hugged Olivia before she scampered off to be with her friends.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

She heard a noise in the kitchen when she returned to the house. Her heart started to beat a little faster as she slowly walked toward the noise. No one else was supposed to be in the house. She had given Marco the day off and she had yet to be introduced to anyone else who may live in the house but she figured Julian, Paul, Diane or even Olivia would have mentioned them. "What are you doing here?" She asked when she saw him.

He whipped around. "What the hell?" He exclaimed. "You scared me half to death."

She couldn't help but smile. "Now you know how I felt. I thought you didn't come home until 10 or 11."

"I usually don't." Julian replied. "But my heart just wasn't there today."

Brooke sat down across the table from him. "What do you do for a living, if you don't mind me asking?"

He stared at her. "You don't know who I am?"

"Should I?"

Julian nodded as s grin started to appear on his face…a grin she found irresistible. "I produce and direct movies, I'm known around the world for great work. I've won a couple Oscars, too." He said as modestly as possible. "I can't believe you don't know who I am."

She shrugged. "Sorry. I'm not really into the whole celebrity-movie-actor thing."

"What are you into, then?" He asked as he folded his hands in front of him. He found her intriguing.

"Cooking and baking."

He could see her eyes light up when she answered. At one point in his life his eyes lit up just like hers but not anymore. "Did you go to school for it?"

She shook her head. "I taught myself. I've always been most comfortable in the kitchen, it's what I do when I get stressed or angry or sad or even happy. I love making food for others to enjoy."

"Is that why you felt compelled to give Marco the day off?" He asked as he raised his eyebrows.

Her cheeks went red. "Sorry," She said softly. "I—"

He held up his hand. "It's okay. He deserved it."

"Really?" She asked dumbfounded.

"You make some good food, Brooke." He smiled as he began to play with a string on the table runner. "Better than Marco."

She eyed him not sure if he was being sarcastic or serious. "Seriously?" She asked.

He nodded. "How do you feel about being the house cook too?"

Her eyes bulged. "Are you kidding? I'd _love_ it! You have state of the art appliances, a fully stocked refrigerator, pantry and cupboards; it's a culinary artist's dream!"

"Good, because I called Marco a little bit a go and told him that you were taking his place."

"He's out of a job? Doesn't he need the money to—"

"My parents hired him. They absolutely love him and his cooking so you have nothing to worry about." He assured her. Her concern for others was something he found endearing.

"So," Brooke said. "Why wasn't your heart in your work today?"

He sighed. "I don't know if I should tell you. I mean it's really personal and I just met you last night."

"Oh, I'm sorry." She said as she shook her head. "I didn't mean to pry."

"But at the same time if I don't talk about it then my head is going to explode." He shrugged. "I just don't know anymore."

Brooke was confused. Last night this man had seemed like he couldn't give her the time of day but now he was interested in her life and actually wanted to talk to her. "Does it have to do with Olivia?"

"Sort of." He replied before sighing. "Her mom left me five years ago today." He shook his head. "I can't believe I just told you that."

Brooke didn't know what to say. He obviously didn't want her to know something that personal about him so fast but he had just blurted it out. She didn't want to say something to make the situation more awkward so she remained quiet hoping he'd say something instead.

"Olivia was ten days old when Kate left us. We were only nineteen and no where near ready or qualified to have a baby but I was excited to take on parenthood. I was excited to be a dad and I thought she was just as excited to be a mom but I guess not." He rested his head in his hands. "She never even said goodbye. I came home to find a note on the counter and all of her stuff gone. She just vanished."

"What does Olivia know about her mom?"

Julian suddenly stood up and walked out of the kitchen. Brooke jumped up and followed him. "I shouldn't have said anything." He said as he shook his head. "I don't know what I was thinking." He reached for his coat and slammed the door behind him as he ran to his car. Brooke stood in the foyer staring out the window watching him with her mouth open. She had no idea what had just happened and she was dreading when Julian walked through the door later on that night.

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"What'd you do today?" Olivia asked as Brooke drove home.

"I started looking for apartments closer to your house since the drive is so long."

"How long?"

"An hour." Brooke replied.

"How long is that?"

"Two episodes of Dora the Explorer long." She said in terms that the little girl would understand.

"Oh," Olivia nodded. "That's pretty long."

Brooke shrugged. She knew the ride could be a lot worse and she didn't mind it in the morning but she hated driving at night. She wasn't really looking forward to the drive home later on. "So, how was school?"

"Good." Olivia shrugged. "We didn't do any Spanish or French. Just German today."

Brooke could hear the disdain in her voice. "I'm sorry, bumblebee."

Olivia laughed. "Why'd you call me a bumblebee?"

She hadn't realized she had done so. "It's what my mom used to call me." She said softly as she shook her head.

"I thought you said your mom was never around?"

"She wasn't." Brooke shook her head. "But when she was, it was the best. We were out in the garden in our backyard one day and I was chasing bumblebees while she was picking flowers. I guess that's where she got it from." She said as she recalled that day from a long time ago.

"Is she around now?"

"No." She replied. "How'd you like the surprise in your lunch?" She asked, changing the subject.

Olivia's eyes lit up. "Marco _never_ cut my peanut butter and jelly sandwiches into the shape of a heart! I gave it to Tyler."

"The boy who told you under the slide that he liked you?"

She nodded. "He's starting to be nice to me in front of his friends now."

"See?" Brooke smiled. "I told you."

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Nothing had been done according to the schedule Diane had left earlier that morning that Brooke had proceeded to crumple up and throw away. When they returned home, Brooke watched Olivia swim in the pool before fixing her a snack. She then helped her with her homework before making dinner for just the two of them. Brooke had wanted to ask Olivia if she missed her dad during dinner but she wasn't sure if she wanted to hear her answer. Of course Olivia missed her dad, he was never around and she felt terrible because she knew what it was like to miss a parent but have no control over it. It was obvious to her that Julian was struggling with something and the subject concerning Olivia's mother was a sensitive one and something he clearly did not want to talk about at all.

Olivia had been asleep for three hours and Brooke had been busy in the kitchen. She had made a plate of food for Julian to heat up and eat when he got home. She wasn't sure if he ate before he came home but she figured he wouldn't mind a home cooked meal and he had told her that he like her cooking so she knew it couldn't hurt. The apple pie she had made the night before was completely gone; so she made him another one. As she cooked, she couldn't ignore the giddy feeling inside of her. Part of her hated herself for feeling that way because she felt like she was hurting him in some way but she knew it was all in her head. He was gone and he wasn't coming back. She had to move on but she didn't know how and she wasn't really sure if she even wanted to.

She was waiting by the door ten minutes before eleven. She didn't want an awkward encounter with Julian especially given how they had left things earlier in the day. So the second she saw his headlights pull into the driveway she reached for her coat and opened the front door. They passed each other on the front steps and avoided eye contact. She could have sworn he said goodnight but she wasn't positive. Once inside her car, she smiled to herself as she thought about him discovering what she had left in the kitchen.

Just like the night before, he came home to a kitchen full of food. Sitting in the middle of the table where he had sat with her earlier that morning was an apple pie. He could see steam rising up from it and that a note was next to it. He shrugged his coat off as he made his way to a drawer to get a fork before sitting down in the dimly lit kitchen.

_Hope you enjoy this one as much as the last one. _

_-Brooke_

_P.S.: I'm sorry about this morning. I hope things aren't awkward between us now. _

He smiled thinking back to their exchange on the front steps moments ago. She hadn't looked at him at all and hadn't responded when he had said goodnight. He didn't really blame her; he had just jumped up from the table and walked out leaving her speechless and confused. He still didn't know why he had told her about Kate, he hadn't told anyone besides his parents about her. For some reason he felt comfortable around Brooke and she put him at ease. As he ate the apple pie, he found himself wishing that she was there in the kitchen enjoying it with him because as much as he didn't want to admit it; he hated being alone.

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Review please!


	3. Spaghetti and Meatballs

Chapter Three: Spaghetti and Meatballs

She was exhausted. She had gotten home a little after twelve and wasn't able to fall asleep until half-past one only to get up at 5:00 to be at Julian's house by 6:30. She needed to find an apartment as soon as possible. The whole ride there she yawned nonstop and she knew that while Olivia was in school she'd be catching up on sleep.

Olivia was such an easy child to care for. She always woke up in the best mood and was constantly laughing and giggling. On her way back from dropping Olivia off at school, Brooke realized she could barely keep her eyes open. She was glad Julian's house was only a few minutes down the road. Upon entering the empty house, she curled up on the couch in the living room and within moments she fell asleep.

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"Julian," Paul sighed as he entered his son's office. "What happened in there?" He asked referring to the production meeting they had just left.

Julian shook his head. "I'm sorry."

"You're usually on your game in there but today you were just so…lost. What's going on?" Paul asked. He was genuinely concerned about his son.

"I've just been thinking a lot about Kate lately."

Paul raised his eyebrows. His son _never_ talked about Kate; the only time Paul could recall Julian doing so was after she left five years ago. After that, he never mentioned her name and neither did Paul or Diane. "Why don't you take the rest of the day off? There's not much to do anyway."

Julian looked up at his father and nodded. Usually he'd argue but today he didn't have the energy. He knew he'd be no help around the office anyway.

As Paul watched his son gather his coat and laptop, he thought of something. "Maybe you could pick Olivia up and spend the day with her. She'd really like that, Julian."

He shrugged. "What am I supposed to do with her?"

Julian had asked Paul and Diane that question thousands of times in the past, mostly right after he was left on his own to raise Olivia. Every time he asked, Paul felt his heart break a little bit more. Kate had broken the man his son used to be and he hated her for that. Before, Julian was so excited to be a father but that excitement left the day Kate did. Ever since then he had made it a point to have as little to do with his daughter as possible. "She's your daughter, Julian, figure it out. It's not that hard." Paul said as he laid a hand on his son's shoulder.

As he drove from his office back to his house he knew he had to change. He didn't like the man he had become in the past five years. It wasn't overnight; little by little, day by day, he turned into a man he didn't recognize anymore. There was a time he was happy-go-lucky and loved life. He never used to be cold and rude but that was who he had become as a result of being hurt by Kate.

When he entered the house, he was surprised that he wasn't met with the scent of cooking food. He looked in the kitchen expecting to find her but she wasn't there. He spotted her curled up on the couch and smiled. Her feet were tucked up underneath her and he thought that she looked cold so he gently draped a blanket over her small form. Even though she was asleep, she looked exhausted. He didn't want to scare her but he couldn't help himself as he sat down across from her and stared at her. He wasn't doing it in a creepy way; he was just entranced by her beauty. What he found most attractive about her was that she wasn't even trying yet he found her irresistible. She had on dark jeans and a grey pullover sweatshirt, her hair was in a ponytail and she was absolutely stunning to him. He reached for the newspaper that she had on the coffee table and began to read until she woke up. A short while later he heard her begin to stir. "Hey there," he said softly.

She jolted up upon hearing his voice. "What are you doing here? Did something happen to Olivia? What—"

"My dad sent me home. Olivia is fine." He replied. He smiled at her concern for his daughter. "How was your nap?"

"I'm sorry, I know you're not paying me to sleep but I'm just exhausted. I didn't get much sleep last night."

Julian raised his eyebrows. "Boyfriend of yours keep you up all night?"

Brooke's face reddened. "No!" She exclaimed. "It's just that I left here pretty late and I live a little over an hour away so by the time I got home and ready for bed, there were only a few hours left until I had to get up to be here on time. I'm looking for apartments closer to where you live so I won't be sleeping on your couch everyday trying to catch up on sleep."

He folded the newspaper and placed it down on the table. "Stop looking for apartments." He said.

"Why?"

"Because you don't need one, it's silly for you to move into one when I have so much room here."

She stared at him. "Are you asking me to move in with you?"

"I'm not asking; I'm telling. It'll be better this way anyway. Now you won't have to stay up and wait for me to come home, you can just go to bed whenever you want and you don't have to wake up early because you'll already be here in the mornings."

"Did any of the other nannies move into the house?"

He shook his head. "Nope, you'll be the first."

She smiled. "Okay, then."

"So, do you want to take a ride with me and pick up your stuff?"

"Right now?" She asked.

He nodded. "Why not?"

An hour later they were at her apartment complex. When he pulled into the parking lot she was nervous as to what he would say since the building was run down and clearly not up to his standards. He didn't say anything, he just smiled at her. She led him up the stairs to her door and she was grateful she had cleaned up a few days ago. "This is it." She said as she waved her hand around the small apartment. Julian's eyes widened. There was barely anything there. There were a few cookbooks sitting on a coffee table, a sweatshirt tossed over the arm of the couch and a drinking glass next to the sink.

"How long have you lived here?" He asked.

"About six months." She shrugged.

"Well, this won't take long to pack up." He said as he continued to look around. She had retrieved a few boxes from the closet and had begun to pack them up. "Where'd you live before here?"

"Tree Hill." She replied earning a questioning look from Julian. "It's a small town in North Carolina."

He tossed the sweatshirt into a box. "Why'd you come here?"

"I'd rather not talk about it." She said quietly and he knew by the way she avoided eye contact and the smallness of her voice that something had happened. Something she had hoped to escape and put behind her but she hadn't been able to. He was intrigued but didn't want to pry because he knew how it felt to have baggage and not want anyone else to know about it.

He continued to pack up things in the living room and kitchen while she went into her bedroom to get her clothes. He realized that she had dozens of cookbooks. He opened one to find several things highlighted, crossed out, and writing in the margins; he smiled as he thought about her sitting on the couch with her feet curled underneath her as she made adjustments to recipes that others had concocted. There was nothing left to pack up so he made his way toward her bedroom. On his way there he spotted a framed photograph of a man who looked to be about the same age as him with his arms wrapped around Brooke. Neither of them was looking at the camera but instead at each other. Julian didn't know anything about the man but he could tell that he was so in love with Brooke by the way he looked at her in the photograph. He had a feeling that this man was the reason Brooke had moved to California six months prior. "Julian?" She called. "Can you help me?" He quickly placed the frame in one of the boxes he had packed before heading toward her bedroom to help her.

They had finished packing up around 2 when Brooke realized she wouldn't be back in time to pick Olivia up. Julian had assured her not to worry about it and proceeded to call his mother who was more than happy to pick the little girl up. On the drive home, he had stopped to get coffee and asked her if she wanted to take a walk on the beach with him.

"Favorite color?" She asked as she sipped her latte and they walked along the shore. They had been doing this for the past half hour as they tried to get to know each other a little better.

"Green." He said without hesitation. "Yours?"

"Purple." She smiled. "Um, let's see. First crush?"

His smile vanished and Brooke was about to ask another question when he answered. "Kate Reynolds. Second grade." He shook his head. "Who was yours?"

"Lucas Scott. Junior year."

Julian stopped walking and looked at her. "You're telling me you your first crush happened when you were in your junior year of high school?"

She nodded. "I wasn't really into boys before then."

"Ah," He grinned. "You were into girls?"

"No!" She laughed as she playfully hit his arm. "I was really invested with school. But he changed that one day in study hall."

"What happened?"

She sighed. "Long story short, we dated, he snuck around behind my back with my best friend, we broke up, got back together, he cheated on me again with her and we broke up for good."

"Wow," he said as he shook his head. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." She shrugged. "It was a long time ago."

"Whatever happened to him?"

"He married my best friend."

Julian made a face. "That must have hurt."

She nodded. "It was painful to watch but Lucas and I were never meant to be. They're so happy and in love. They had a little girl shortly after they got married and Peyton's pregnant with a boy now. This is the way things are supposed to be."

He admired her selflessness. "Was he your first love?"

She shook her head as she tried to hide the tears that were forming in her eyes. "No." Her voice cracked and that was when he noticed her tears. "I didn't mean to make you cry." He whispered as he wiped them from her face.

She melted into his touch as she rested her head against his chest. Caught off guard, he carefully wrapped his arms around her and rubbed soothing circles on her back. He listened to her cries as he wondered what had made her so emotional. He now knew that the man in the picture wasn't Lucas, she wouldn't keep a picture of her and her best friend's husband when they were so in love. The man had to be her first love, he thought, but what had happened between them and who was he? Suddenly, as if she became aware of what she was doing, she pulled away from him. "I'm sorry." She said as she continued to back away from him and head toward the car.

"Brooke!" He called after her but she kept running. "Wait!"

He unlocked the car and she slid into the passenger seat without saying a word. He started the car and began to head home unsure of what he should say. "It's okay." He finally said. "You don't have to be embarrassed. I didn't mind." In all honesty he loved the feeling of her in his arms but that scared him to death. He didn't want to ruin her like he had done with all the rest.

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When they returned home, they found Olivia doing her homework. Brooke noticed that Diane had stuck to the schedule and another one had been posted on the fridge. Diane kept Olivia busy and out of the way while Julian helped Brooke carry her things up to her new room.

When Julian opened the door to the room in which Brooke would call her own, her jaw dropped. It was easily four times the size of her apartment. "Are you sure you don't mind me living here?" She asked as she placed a box down on her bed.

"No," He replied as he made his way toward her. He took her small hands into his and squeezed. "If you need someone to talk to, I'm here." He said softly.

She nodded. "I know. Same goes for you."

She watched as he walked out of her room and listened as he went down the stairs. When she couldn't hear him anymore she took her jeans and sweatshirt off to change into something more comfortable.

"Brooke?"

She jumped at the sound of the voice and hurried to hide her body.

It was no use, Diane had seen everything. "Sweetie, what happened—"

"I'm fine." She said as she quickly pulled her sweatpants up. "Please don't tell anyone." She begged.

Diane nodded. "I won't." She said, the image burned in her mind.

Brooke could tell Diane was nervous and now uncomfortable after what she had seen moments ago. "I'm okay, really." She assured her.

She smiled weakly. "I actually need to talk to you about Julian."

Brooke nodded as she sat down on the edge of her bed. Diane sat in an oversized chair opposite the small brunette. "I don't want you to get hurt, Brooke." She said quietly. "Olivia has not stopped talking about you from the moment I picked her up today at school. She _never_ did that with her previous nannies. She absolutely adores you and I don't want to think about what would happen if you left her—"

"I'd never do that." Brooke assured Diane. "Never."

Diane nodded before continuing. "Do you know why Olivia has had ten nannies within the past five months?"

Brooke shook her head.

"Julian ruins them. He's broken inside and he needs to feel wanted so he'll use the woman he hired as Olivia's nanny for sex. The women always want more from him but he doesn't want to commit, all he wants is to use them for sex. So, they leave. I don't want you to get your heart broken by my son, Brooke."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because this is what he does. He asks them to move into the house so that they can be closer to Olivia but it's really for him. He'll sneak into your room and romance you. He'll flirt and make you think he's falling in love with you and then one day you'll be blind-sighted. You'll realize he never really cared about you, just the sex. He's broken, Brooke, and I don't want to see him break you too."

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"What are you cooking?" Olivia asked as she walked into the kitchen.

"Dinner." Brooke replied as she stirred a pot.

"What are we having?"

"You and I are having spaghetti and homemade meatballs with garlic bread." She smiled.

"What about my daddy?"

"He's having brussel sprouts, beets and liver."

"Gross!" She exclaimed. "Why does he have to eat that?"

"Because your daddy wasn't very nice today so he doesn't get to enjoy a nice meal like the one we're going to eat."

"What did he do?"

Brooke shook her head. "Nothing you have to worry about. How was school?"

Olivia filled Brooke in on what had happened at school while she finished making dinner. She wasn't sure where Julian was but she really didn't care. She sat down next to Olivia and the two of them began to eat. Halfway through, Julian walked into the kitchen.

"Daddy!" Olivia squealed.

"Dinner smells great." He said as he looked down at their plates. Brooke hated that he had completely ignored Olivia. "Spaghetti and meatballs is my favorite."

Brooke stood up and brought her plate to the sink. She rinsed it and put it in the dishwasher before getting Julian's plate out of the fridge. "Enjoy." She said as she tossed it onto the counter.

"Brooke," He said warily. "What's wrong?" He looked down to see what she had made for him and he grimaced at the sight of the liver.

"You were naughty." Olivia explained.

Julian looked at Brooke. "What did I do?"

She folded her arms across her chest and turned her attention to Olivia. "You almost done, sweetheart?" She asked. Olivia nodded. "Okay, well it seems as though you got more of your food on you than in you." She laughed as she looked at all the spaghetti in Olivia's lap and on her face. "Let's go clean you up."

Julian watched as Brooke picked his daughter up and carried her up the staircase. He looked around the kitchen to see if she had made extra spaghetti but she hadn't. He noticed that all the food she had made the previous two nights had been thrown out leaving him with his brussel sprouts, beets and liver to eat. As he sat down at the table he wracked his brain trying to figure out what had made Brooke so angry and for the life of him he couldn't figure it out.

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She couldn't find it. She realized she must have left it at the apartment and panic set in. She grabbed her coat and raced down the stairs only to bump into him.

"Whoa!" He exclaimed. "Where are you going?"

"Back to the apartment, I forgot something." She said hurriedly.

"Brooke, it's late. Whatever it is can wait until tomorrow."

"No it can't." She said as she fought back tears.

"What is so important?"

"It doesn't concern you." She replied harshly.

"Would it happen to be a picture of you and some man?"

She stopped and turned to look at him. "How did you know?"

"I saw it on the table while you were packing up your room. It's in the box with your cookbooks and magazines." He told her. He followed her up the stairs and stayed outside her bedroom and listened as she rummaged through the box. She exhaled deeply when she found it and began to cry even harder. He sank down against the wall outside her room and ran his hand down his face. She had been so emotional all day and he wanted to know why; he wanted to help her get past whatever was making her suffer but he couldn't because she, for some reason, had shut him out. He was going to change that because he wanted to get back to the man he used to be and he knew that with her help he'd be able to.

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Review please!


	4. Enchiladas

Chapter Four: Enchiladas

She couldn't get over how he had ignored his daughter the previous evening. Olivia had been delighted when she saw her dad walk into the kitchen but he couldn't give her the time of day. As she lay in bed, she realized it was Saturday and smiled. She was done being emotional, she hadn't meant to be and she didn't like being vulnerable. Especially, in front of a man she had only met three days prior. She swung her feet over the edge of the bed and stretched her arms before getting up and putting her bathrobe on. At her apartment she never had to worry if the part of her body she hated the most was showing but here she did. She glanced in the mirror and was glad to see that what Diane had seen the day before was fully covered.

The aroma of fresh coffee, pancakes, bacon and eggs filled his nose causing him to stir from his sleep. He smiled at the thought of her in the kitchen making so many delicious foods. He swung his legs over the side of his bed and stretched his arms before getting out of bed. He tiptoed by his daughter's room and peeked in to see her still sound asleep clutching the stuffed elephant his dad had gotten her for her birthday.

"Do I get to eat the good food this time or do you have something nasty for me again?" He asked as he walked into the kitchen.

She ignored him completely as she continued to make scrambled eggs.

"Brooke, come on." He pleaded as he sat down at the counter. "Tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it."

She looked at him for the first time. "I'm not doing this for me, I'm doing it for your daughter," She said glancing down before continuing. "You're not going into work today."

He raised his brows. "Why not?"

"Because it's Saturday and you don't need to be there. I called your dad and even he takes weekends off, Julian. He told me that the entire office is closed on Saturdays and Sundays but you go in there just so you don't have to spend time with your daughter. I'm not allowing you to do that anymore." She said as she placed her hands on her hips. "She needs her dad in her life."

"You're not allowing me to go to work on the weekends anymore?" He asked. "Last time I checked you weren't my mother."

"Oh, that reminds me." She said. "She told me about you and the previous nannies."

He paled about three shades. "Brooke—"

She held up her hand. "I don't want to hear it. You might want to wake Olivia up, you two need to be out of the house in an hour."

"For what?"

"You're taking her to see a movie and then out to lunch and then shopping for a new outfit."

"No," Julian said as he shook his head. "I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"Because I've never spent time alone with her before."

She stared at him. "You're kidding, right?"

He shook his head.

"Julian, she's five years old! What kind of father are you?"

"A shitty one!" He yelled. "I know, Brooke! I know how bad of a father I've been to Olivia and I hate it! But I don't know how to change."

Brooke looked down at the eggs. "I'll go with you." She said softly.

He stared at her. "Seriously?"

She nodded. "Like I said, I'm doing this for Olivia."

He reached for a piece of bacon. "Okay." He said quietly. "About what my mom said—"

"Why'd you lie to me?" She asked as she angrily threw the spatula down. "I'm clearly not the first nanny to move in with you so why'd you say that I was?"

"I wanted you to feel special and not like you were just another girl I hired to take care of my daughter—"

"Is it true that you use them for sex?"

"Brooke, I don't think—"

"Is it?" She pressed.

He nodded shamefully.

"Did you ever love any of those women?"

"No, but—"

"Did you make them think you did?"

He really didn't like her constantly interrupting him but he figured he deserved it after lying to her. "Yes." He replied.

She reached for the spatula again and continued to move the eggs around in the pan. "Well, I just want you to know that I will not be one of those girls, I refuse to be. I'm not going to be the girl you use because you need a release; I'm saving sex for the one man I'm going to spend the rest of my life with." She said sternly.

He eyed her curiously. "You're saving yourself for marriage?"

"Do you have a problem with that?" She asked.

"No, not at all." He replied quickly. "Are we okay now?"

She shook her head. "You lied to my face. This isn't something that is easily fixed, Julian. It's going to take time but for right now, I'm going to get along with you for Olivia's sake."

Just then Olivia sleepily walked into the kitchen. "Good morning, Brooke." She smiled as she rubbed her eyes. Julian was standing right next to Brooke but Olivia acted as if he wasn't standing there.

"Aren't you going to say good morning to your daddy?" Brooke asked.

Olivia shrugged. "Hi." She said meekly.

Brooke watched as Julian hung his head. It was breaking her heart to see the two of them interact. "Guess what, bumblebee? Daddy took the day off from work to spend with you!" She tried to sound as excited as possible.

Olivia looked at her dad and then back at Brooke. "Are you coming with us?"

She nodded. "We can do whatever you want to do."

Her eyes lit up. "Can we go to the zoo?"

Brooke laughed. "Of course! The whole day is up to you."

Julian sat back and watched Brooke interact with his daughter. She was so natural with Olivia. It was obvious that Olivia craved a mother figure and while it comforted him that she would see Brooke as such it scared him because what if he found another woman to spend his life with? How would Olivia cope with that? How would Brooke?

A short while later, they had eaten, showered and dressed and were on their way to the zoo. Brooke could tell Julian was nervous but she could only imagine what things would be like if she wasn't with him and Olivia. "Ask her about school." Brooke whispered as Julian drove.

He glanced in the rearview mirror and saw his daughter talking to herself quietly as she looked out the window. "How's school going?" He asked, his voice sounded different to Brooke. He sounded scared.

Olivia didn't respond.

"Sweetie, your daddy asked you a question." Brooke said gently as she turned around to face her. "Why don't you tell him about all you're learning in Spanish and French?"

"I'm learning Spanish and French." Olivia said quietly.

Julian groaned in frustration. "This was a bad idea." He mumbled to Brooke.

Thankfully, the ride to the zoo was short. Brooke helped Olivia out of her car seat and Julian watched as his daughter reached up to hold Brooke's hand instead of his own. "What do you want to see first?" Brooke asked once they were in the zoo. Olivia shrugged. "Ask your dad what he wants to see." She suggested.

Olivia looked up at Julian and then back to Brooke. "Can you ask him?" She whispered.

This was absolutely killing Brooke. It didn't make sense how scared and timid Olivia was of her father. She could see that Julian was breaking just as much on the inside as she was but she didn't know what to do to fix it. Without thinking she let go of Olivia's hand who looked up at her when she did so. Brooke locked eyes with Julian and he understood. Warily, he walked toward Olivia and reached down for her hand. It was so small in his large hand; it felt foreign and familiar all at once.

"Why are you crying, daddy?" Her small voice asked.

He hadn't realized he was doing so as he wiped his eyes. He didn't respond, instead he bent down and picked her up. Brooke could tell by the expression on Olivia's face that she was surprised and a little freighted but that look quickly disappeared and was replaced by a large grin that resembled Julian's. "What do you want to see first, Olivia Rae?" He asked.

She shrugged. "What do _you_ want to see, daddy?"

He thought for a moment. "The zebras."

Olivia's eyes lit up. "Miss Danielle just taught us about them! Do you think they are black with white stripes or white with black stripes?"

He laughed as he began walking toward the zebras only to stop when he realized Brooke was not beside him. He turned to see her with her hand over her heart and tears in her eyes. "Come on," He said as he waved toward him and Olivia. "The zebras are waiting for us."

She trotted toward them and listened as Olivia started to open up more to Julian. She definitely wasn't as talkative as she usually was with Brooke but she wasn't being a mute, either. Brooke knew it would take time for Julian and Olivia to forge a relationship but she was glad that they were finally on their way.

Olivia stood on her tiptoes calling at the zebras trying to get them to come closer. Brooke was by his side one moment and gone the next. He glanced around trying to figure out where she had gone when he heard his daughter's laugh. Brooke was holding Olivia in her arms as a zebra licked his daughter's hand. She was trying to get Brooke to let the zebra lick her hand but Brooke refused. He couldn't help but feel blessed to have her as Olivia's nanny. None of the others had ever cared about her as much as Brooke did. None of them had ever refused sex from him. He couldn't see a future with any of them until now. As he watched Brooke with his daughter he felt his heart surge with emotion. It scared him to death because he had only known her for three days but there was just something about her. He could see her five years from now helping Olivia with homework while cooking dinner with a baby on the way…their baby. He shook his head. She had made it clear this morning that she wanted nothing to do with him, that this was for Olivia not him.

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Olivia emerged from the dressing room and struck a pose. Brooke couldn't help but laugh. They had been in the department store for close to an hour and Olivia was having a ball trying on all sorts of different outfits. "That's cute," She said. "Try this on."

Olivia took the outfit from Brooke before shutting the door to change. "So," Julian said as he shuffled through a rack of little girl's jeans. "Are we okay yet?"

"You're seriously asking me that question again?" She asked. "It's been less than five hours since the last time you asked!"

He shrugged. "I don't like feeling like I've disappointed you."

"Well, it's too late for that." She replied.

"Brooke," He said as he stepped closer. "If I could, I'd take back everything I said yesterday if it would make what I'm feeling go away."

"Guilt." She said matter-of-factly. "What you're feeling is guilt and that's a pretty selfish reason if you ask me."

"I didn't." He said defensively. "I don't get you."

"I'm really not that hard to figure out." She said honestly.

"You are." He argued. He found it cute the way she placed her hand on her hip and sighed in annoyance when he argued her point. Olivia emerged from the dressing room in her own clothes and looked up at her dad. "Did you decide on an outfit?" He asked.

She nodded.

"Which one will it be?"

"All of them." She said earning a laugh from Brooke.

"Olivia, the agreement was to pick out one outfit, not fifteen." Julian said as he folded his arms across his chest. "But, I guess you do need new clothes since you've been growing like a weed lately."

Olivia's eyes lit up and she began to jump up and down. Brooke knew that was not the case, he had just been consumed by guilt again and he knew that if he bought Olivia what she wanted all would be forgiven. It sickened her to think that he thought he could buy his daughter's love and forgiveness and that it was perfectly okay to do so. She waited for Julian to pay and watched as Olivia's eyes grew wider and wider as she watched each piece of new clothing be placed into a bag that was bigger than her.

"Thank you, daddy!" Olivia squealed as she struggled to carry the oversized bag to the car.

"You're welcome, princess." He replied, grinning to himself.

Brooke shook her head in annoyance and scoffed causing Julian to stop short. "Olivia, why don't you hop in the car? I need to talk to Brooke for a second." He said as he unlocked the car. Olivia did as she was told and climbed into her car seat while keeping her eyes on her dad and her nanny.

"What was that about?" He asked referring to her scoff.

"I just think it's a little ridiculous." Brooke replied.

"What? That I bought my daughter new clothes?"

"Six hundred dollars worth is a bit much, don't you think? Especially for a girl who still fits in all of her clothes at home."

"Again, last time I checked you weren't my mother. And FYI it's my money and I can spend it however I damn well please." He shot back.

"Do you really think you can buy her forgiveness for how shitty of a father you've been to her the past five years? Do you honestly think that new clothes can erase all the damage you've done to her?"

He pointed to the car where his daughter was watching with wide eyes. "She seems pretty damn happy to me! I haven't seen her this excited in a while."

"When do you ever see her, Julian?" She challenged. "You're never around!"

He knew it was the truth but for some reason he felt like he had the wind knocked out of him when he heard those words come from her mouth. "Get in the car." He grumbled.

She stayed put while he sunk down into the driver's seat. "Brooke, get in the damn car." He demanded as he rolled the window down.

"No." She said simply. "I think I'm going to walk."

"The house is ten miles from here," He told her. "You're insane if you walk."

She ignored him as she began walking. She could hear Olivia crying from the backseat and she almost walked toward the car but she couldn't do it. She couldn't get in the car with Julian and let him think that he'd won.

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They walked into the house and were met by the enticing aroma of Mexican food. Olivia wandered into the kitchen, still dragging her shopping bag, and Julian followed.

"What are you doing home?" He asked when he saw her laying plates of food down on the table. "How did you get home?"

"Dinner's ready." She smiled as she pulled out Olivia's chair and helped her settle in. "I made enchiladas, I hope you like them."

"Marco always made them for me on my birthday!" She giggled. "They're my birthday food!"

Brooke smiled. "I know. And I figured since I wasn't here to celebrate your birthday last week, we could celebrated it again tonight."

Olivia nodded ferociously as Julian stared at Brooke. How did she know? He sat down in between his daughter and Brooke and the three began to eat their meal. Neither of them talked to each other, only to Olivia. When they finished, Brooke cleared the table and retrieved an ice cream cake from the freezer.

"Did you make that?" Julian asked.

Brooke nodded as she began to light the candles.

He stared at it in amazement. The cake was three tiers and pink with white polka dots and had _Happy Birthday Olivia!_ written in silver icing. Olivia devoured her piece of cake and asked her dad if she could have another one to which he said she could.

"Here you go, bumblebee." Brooke said as she handed Olivia a wrapped package.

She instantly tore the butterfly wrapping paper off and stared at her present. "What is it?" She asked.

"It's a CD and coloring book to help you learn German. I know you said you don't like it as much as Spanish and French but maybe if I help you, you'll learn to like it."

"You're going to help me?" She asked.

Brooke nodded. "Of course."

Olivia wrapped her arms around Brooke and squeezed tight. "Thank you."

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The dishes were washed, the kitchen was clean and Olivia was fast asleep. Julian had walked by her room to hear the German CD talking to a sleeping girl. He smiled as he quietly tiptoed into her room to turn it off. The bag of clothes was in the corner of her room, untouched.

"Julian?"

He poked his head in her room to see her sitting in the middle of the floor playing solitaire. "I'm sorry for today." She said softly.

"I am too." He replied as he sat down beside her. "Do you know how to play Go Fish?"

She couldn't help but laugh. "I think so." She said as she scooped up the cards and began to shuffle. "Favorite season?"

He grinned. "Spring."

She began to deal cards. "Mine too."

As he sat in the middle of her room watching her deal cards to play Go Fish he knew they were going to be okay. The question brought him back to the day before when they were walking on the beach getting to know each other. Tonight, she wanted to know more about him just like he wanted to know more about her.

"Best teacher?" He asked as he laid down a match of 3s.

"Mrs. O'Brien."

"What'd she teach?"

She smiled. "German."

He shook his head and laughed. "Are you going to tell Olivia you know a little German?"

"A little?" She asked as she laid down two kings. "I'm fluent."

"Tell me something, then." He challenged.

"Ich glaube, ich konnte in dich verlieben."

"You're not going to tell me what that means, are you?"

"Not a chance." She smiled. "Got any aces?"

"Go fish."

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Review please!

Happy Birthday Jordan! You're the best :)


	5. Cookie Dough

**Wow. The number of people who have read and reviewed this so far has floored me! I still can't get over how many reviews I have gotten and I'm only four chapters in…it's unreal. Thank you to each and every single one of you I appreciate more than you'll ever know! I hope everyone enjoys this chapter as much as the previous ones. **

**P.S. : I'd love to hear any ideas anyone might have for future chapters!**

Chapter Five: Cookie Dough

Monday everything went back to normal. Julian got up at the crack of dawn to leave for work leaving Brooke alone in the house with Olivia. The past two days had been great, he and Olivia had made progress but Brooke knew that Olivia was going to start expecting Julian to be there for her. She padded down the stairs as she rubbed her eyes thinking about what to make for breakfast. She was pleasantly surprised to see Diane sitting in the kitchen with Paul sipping a cup of coffee.

"Hi." Brooke greeted as she opened the fridge to retrieve some eggs. "Will you guys be joining us for breakfast this morning?" She noticed the somber looks on both of their faces and her smile quickly vanished. "What's wrong?" She asked warily.

"I know you said not to tell anyone, Brooke but—" Diane shook her head unable to continue.

"She's been struggling with what she saw, dear." Paul said gently. "She's worried about you."

Brooke's heart ached at Diane's concern. "I'm okay." She assured them. "It happened six months ago."

She could see tears in Diane's eyes. "What happened?"

"It was an accident." Brooke shrugged it off. "I'm sorry, but I really don't like talking about it because it brings me right back to when it happened and it's too painful."

"Have you told Julian?" Paul asked.

Fear flashed in her eyes. "No. He doesn't need to know. You didn't tell him, did you?"

Both of them shook their heads. "You need to talk to someone about what happened, Brooke." Diane said softly. "I can tell that it's eating at you and you're not going to get better if you just suppress your feelings—"

"Please," Brooke begged. "I talked to someone after it happened and it didn't help."

Diane nodded as she looked worriedly at Paul. "If you need anything—"

"I know where to find you." She smiled.

"Grandma and grandpa?" Olivia squealed when she saw them. "What are you doing here?"

Paul smiled as he lifted his granddaughter up into his lap. "We wanted to have breakfast with you today, is that okay?"

Olivia nodded and turned her attention to Brooke. "What are you making?"

"Just some eggs, toast and turkey bacon," she said as she cracked an egg into the frying pan. "Is that okay?"

Olivia nodded. "I love when you make eggs."

Paul couldn't help but smile at his granddaughter's interaction with Brooke. Never before had he seen Olivia act this way with a nanny; she was the little girl he knew and loved. He looked over at his wife and grinned. He knew she was thinking the same thing as him and he realized in that moment that he would do anything it took to protect the relationship Olivia and Brooke had forged so quickly.

Paul and Diane left shortly after breakfast so Olivia could get ready. Brooke helped her bathe and get dressed into her uniform before packing her lunch and backpack for the day. Olivia reached for Brooke's hand and smiled as they headed for the front door to head to school.

"What does it feel like to have a mommy?" Olivia asked as Brooke drove.

She was caught off guard. She glanced in the rearview mirror to see Olivia staring back at her waiting for an answer. "Well, sweetie, I really couldn't tell you. Mine wasn't really ever around."

"But you said when she _was_ around it was the best."

Brooke nodded. "It was, and I think that was because I never got to spend time with her so when I did I tried to make the most of it."

"All my friend's mom's read them stories at night and bake their favorite cookies for them for no reason. They build forts in the living room with blankets and chairs and stay there all day pretending to be camping in the woods. How come I don't have a mommy to do that kind of stuff with?" Olivia wondered.

Brooke rubbed her forehead and sighed, she didn't know what Julian had told Olivia about Kate and she didn't want to say something she would regret. "I don't know sweetie," She answered. "But I do know that you have a lot of people who love you. You have your daddy and grandma and grandpa and—"

"You?" Olivia smiled.

"And me." Brooke confirmed.

"What if…" Olivia trailed off and shook her head.

"What if what?"

"Nothing."

"Bumblebee," Brooke laughed. "What is it?"

Olivia looked out the window and was thankful to be at school. "Thanks for the ride!" She chirped as she unbuckled her car seat. "See you at three!"

Brooke scurried out of the car. "I'm supposed to walk you in, remember?" She asked reaching for the little girl's hand. "What were you going to ask me?"

"Nothing!" Olivia insisted as she dragged Brooke toward the building. "I'm here safely, you can go now."

She bent down and gave Olivia a hug before heading back to the car. She glanced back at the five-year-old on her way back and shook her head. Olivia was waving back with a smirk on her face. She was dying to know what she had wanted to ask moments earlier but doubted she'd ever find out.

He scared her when she walked into the house. "Don't you have a big important job?" She asked as she placed her purse down and took off her coat.

He nodded as he walked over to help her.

"So, aren't you supposed to be at work?"

"I haven't taken a sick day in five years; I have plenty of sick time saved up." He grinned.

"But you're not sick."

"I'm the boss, I make the rules."

"I thought your dad was the boss?" She asked as she raised an eyebrow.

"Well," He sighed. "Technically he is but I run everything. He's turned it all over to me so he can enjoy more time with my mom."

"Don't you want to turn it all over to someone so you can spend time with your daughter? She's not going to be young and forgiving forever, you know? There's going to come a time where she's going to hate you and resent you for always choosing your job over her."

"I don't choose my job over her!" He quickly defended.

"Really?" She asked as she placed a hand on her hip. "You're really saying that to me right now? I've been here a week and you've only spent a few hours with her at the zoo."

"We all went to the park yesterday." He argued.

"Yes, but _I _was the one who pushed her on the swing. _I _was the one to help her on the monkey bars. _I _was the one to go down the slide with her. You sat at the picnic table and read over a script. You didn't spend any time with her, Julian."

"I don't know how." He sighed as he followed her into the kitchen. "For the past five years I've pawned her off to my parents or the nanny I hired to care for her. I don't have any fatherly instincts. I don't know what the hell I'm doing."

"I'm willing to help you but you have to make an effort to want to be with her. She's dying to spend time with you, Julian; she loves you more than anything in this world."

He laughed. "I find that hard to believe."

"She's told me multiple times how much she loves you. She just doesn't understand why you don't love her back."

He stared at her. "She said that to you?"

Brooke nodded.

Julian sank into a chair at the kitchen table and ran his hand down his face. "How do I change that?" He asked.

"Spend time with her. Show her how much you love her, stay home on the weekends, come home early from work for dinner and tuck her in at night before reading a story." Brooke replied as she sat down across from him.

He looked up at her. "I know this is going to sound strange but I'm terrified of her."

"I know." She nodded.

"When I brought her home from the hospital she was just so small that I was scared I was going to break her. Then Kate left and I was so depressed that I wanted nothing to do with Olivia because she reminded me so much of Kate. I'm scared that if I get close to her I'll resent her for being so much like her mother and I know that's not Olivia's fault but I can't help it."

"I know I've never met Kate but I think Olivia looks just like you." Brooke offered. "You both have the same eyes, and she has the same adorable grin as you and—"

"You think I have an adorable grin?" He smiled.

Her cheeks reddened. "No, I um—I—"

He continued to smile and watch as she struggled to regain her composure. "Anyway," She said. "She's your daughter and you have to start making an effort."

He nodded. "Okay."

She stared at him in surprise. "You're not going to fight me and say that you already do like you usually do when I suggest quality time with Olivia?'

He laughed. "You think you're funny, don't you?"

"Hilarious, actually."

"Well, you're right."

She placed the measuring cup down and shook her head. "I'm sorry, can you say that again?"

"You are right." He repeated slower. "I need to spend time with her. I want to spend time with her."

"Good." She smiled. "You can start by helping me bake cookies."

"Why?" He asked as he retrieved a mixing bowl.

Brooke sighed. "She's craving a mother figure in her life, Julian. Today, on the way to school she asked what it's like to have a mom and I didn't know what to say."

He eyed her curiously. "What did you say?"

"I told her that mine wasn't really around but when she was it was the best. I didn't know what you had already told her about Kate and I didn't want to say something if you hadn't talked to her about her mother at all yet."

"I haven't." Julian replied. "So, thank you."

She nodded as she cracked an egg into the bowl. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know." He shrugged. "What am I supposed to do?"

Brooke couldn't help but laugh a little in disbelief. He had been a father for a little more than five years and he had no clue what he was doing. He constantly had to ask what he should do and that broke her heart because she knew how much Olivia was struggling but Julian was clearly struggling even more. "She has questions that need answers. You're going to have to sit down and talk to her about Kate at some point and I think it would be easier now because she's so young and innocent. All she's going to want to know is why she doesn't have a mom like the rest of her friends."

He watched as she dumped a bag of chocolate chips into the bowl and began to stir. "How are you so good at this?" He asked.

"Cooking? It's just came naturally for me, I guess." She shrugged.

He shook his head. "I meant with Olivia."

"She makes it easy."

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She could hear them laughing in the kitchen when she entered the house. She was just there to apologize for earlier in the day and she wasn't expecting her son to be home from work. She stood in the foyer, out of sight, and listened. She hadn't heard her son laugh so loudly and purely in over five years…she had thought he had forgotten how.

"I cannot believe you just did that!" She heard Brooke shriek. Diane moved to see what had happened. She smiled to herself when she saw cookie dough smeared in the young girl's hair.

Diane watched as Brooke grabbed the bag of flour off the counter and dumped it all over her son. He blinked through the fine dust and shook his head causing flour to go everywhere in the kitchen. Brooke squealed again as she tried to run away from him but she wasn't fast enough. Diane watched as Julian wrapped his arms around Brooke's waist and tossed her over his shoulder while she squealed and playfully swatted at him. "Put me down!" She begged.

He reached into the fridge and pulled out a container of chocolate syrup before putting her down. She hadn't seen what he had in his hands so when he squirted the brown liquid at her she shrieked. After he had emptied the container he placed it down and smiled. She looked down at her soiled clothes and shook her head. "This was my favorite sweatshirt."

"I'll buy you another one." He shrugged. "This was my favorite tie."

She looked at the tie that only had a dusting of flour on it. She reached for the bottle of vanilla on the counter, unscrewed the cap and walked toward him. To her surprise, he didn't back away. Instead, he smiled at her and held out his tie. She poured the entire bottle of vanilla all over his tie and smiled contently once she had finished. "Don't worry, I'll buy you another one." She said huskily as she started to walk out of the kitchen.

Diane panicked and quickly exited the house before she was caught spying. As she walked down the front steps she couldn't help but smile and be thankful that her son had hired Brooke. She had transformed him into a different man in a week…a man she was happy to call her son.

"Where are you going?" Julian called after her.

"To take a shower."

"Aren't you going to clean up this mess?" He asked as he looked around the dirty kitchen.

She turned and smirked at him. "You started it. You get to finish it."

He watched as she climbed the stairs and couldn't help but smile. He was falling for her and while it excited him it also scared him to death. The last time he had given his heart to a woman she had handed it back in a million little pieces. He listened to the water start as he cleaned up the mess they had made in the kitchen. As he tossed what was left of the cookie batter into the trash he got an idea and quickly got to work.

"Brooke?" He knocked twice before entering. "I made—"

"Get out!" She shrieked as she tried to cover her body. "Get out!"

He stood in the doorway with his mouth open. He wasn't able to turn away. "Brooke—"

"Go away!" She cried as she wrapped her arms around her body. What he had seen was covered by her bathrobe and was no longer visible but the image was still vivid in his mind.

She was crying and backing further and further away from him. He couldn't help himself. He continued to move toward her until she was up against the wall. She begged for him to leave, to go away, but he couldn't. He couldn't leave her like this. He wrapped his arms around her small frame and together they sank down against the wall. She cried in his arms while he rubbed her back and whispered in her ear that it was okay.

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She needed to get out of the house. As she drove toward Olivia's school she couldn't help but replay the moments in her head. He wasn't supposed to have seen her like that. He wasn't supposed to know. She was mad at herself for not locking the door, for not learning her lesson after Diane had walked in. Olivia tore her from her thoughts when she got into the car.

"How was your day?" Olivia asked as Brooke buckled the seatbelt.

"Good." Brooke lied. "How was yours?"

"Sehr gut." She giggled. "That's German for very good."

"I know." Brooke smiled. "Did you learn that today?"

Olivia nodded.

The ride home was filled with Olivia's voice as she told Brooke all the German words she had learned earlier in the day. She was still talking when the entered the house but stopped suddenly. Brooke looked up to see why and saw Julian standing in front of them.

"Daddy!" Olivia squealed as she let go of Brooke's hand and ran toward Julian. "What are you doing home?"

Julian enveloped his daughter in a hug and smiled up at Brooke. "I wanted to spend time with you." He replied. "Is that okay?"

Olivia nodded. "Why don't you go get yourself a cookie? They're fresh out of the oven." Olivia's eyes lit up as she ran into the kitchen. Once she was out of earshot, he turned toward Brooke. "I'm sorry—"

Brooke shook her head and held up his hand instantly silencing him. "I don't want your pity. I don't want you to look at me like you are right now, like I'm some sort of helpless victim. I don't want you to be sad for me because I can't handle that. It happened six months ago and I'm _finally_ coming to terms with what happened so I can't have you looking at me like you are because if you do all the progress I've made will have been for nothing."

He nodded but the look still remained in his eyes. He couldn't pretend he hadn't seen anything but he was going to have to try because it was what she wanted.

"Daddy? Did you make these cookies?" Olivia asked.

Julian nodded.

"They're disgusting!" She giggled.

"What do you mean?" He asked as he reached for one off of the plate. The moment he took a bite he knew what his daughter had meant. Olivia handed him a napkin in which he spit out the cookie.

"I think you mixed up the sugar and salt." Olivia said before tuning to Brooke. "See? I told you he was a bad cook!"

Brooke couldn't help but laugh. Julian watched as her face lit up but the moment his eyes locked with hers she faded. He worried that things would never be the same between them after what he had seen when he walked in. He wanted to go back in time to right before he knocked on her door. He should have waited for her to say it was okay for him to come in. But, he thought, if he hadn't he wouldn't have been able to comfort her and hold her in his arms. He couldn't help but think that she fit so perfectly in his embrace, almost as if she was meant to be there all along. Maybe, she was his missing piece; with her by his side he would finally be complete…_they_ would finally be complete.

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Review please!


	6. Chicken Noodle Soup

**I know this chapter is super short and I'm really sorry for that. I thought about adding on to it but then I figured that I'd rather let what is discussed in this chapter stand alone. I didn't want to ruin it by adding anything else. Hope you enjoy! **

Chapter Six: Chicken Noodle Soup

He paced back and forth in front of her door. She had dropped Olivia off at school earlier in the morning and had been locked in her room ever since. It had been three days since he had walked in on her and they had yet to talk. He had come home every evening for dinner and the two of them had awkwardly made eye contact several times while Olivia talked about school. He had had enough.

He knocked on the door. He heard her muffled voice beg him to go away. "I'm coming in." He said through the door and waited a moment before entering. She was cuddled in bed with her back to him. "Brooke?" He said warily as he made his way toward her. When he got closer he noticed the silent tears falling down her face and that she was clutching the picture of the man Julian had yet to learn the identity of.

"I told you to go away." She mumbled.

He sat down on the floor across from her side of the bed and looked up at her. "I can't do that." He said quietly.

She remained quiet for a little while and he didn't say anything in fear that he would say the wrong thing. "I lied to you." She finally whispered.

He squinted up at her. "When?"

"I told you that I had finally come to terms with what had happened. I haven't. I struggle with it everyday. It used to be the only thing I'd ever think of but ever since I've been here it hasn't been so bad. When your mom saw me she—"

"My mom knows?"

Brooke nodded. "She walked in on me a few days before you did. I begged her not to say anything to you because I didn't think you had to know, she wasn't even supposed to know. Nobody was supposed to know." She sat up and the picture she had been holding fell to the floor. Julian picked it up and handed it back to her locking eyes with her the entire time.

"Who is he?" He asked softly. The moment the question left his mouth he regretted it. He didn't mean for it to come out but he was curious, he prayed he hadn't scared her into not saying another thing.

"His name is Owen." She replied as she rubbed her finger over the glass that protected the picture. "He was my boyfriend."

Julian nodded unsure of what to say next.

"Shortly after Lucas got together with Peyton for the second time, I met Owen. He was just what I needed then. He got my mind off what had happened with my best friend and my boyfriend. We started out as friends but as time went on we grew into something more." She looked down at Julian and bit her lip unsure if she should continue. She knew if she did there would be no going back. He'd know everything about her and why she was the way she was. That scared her to no end but she also found if comforting that she wouldn't have to deal with her past by herself anymore. She patted the spot beside her on the bed and within moments Julian was in bed beside her. "He worked as a bartender at a club my best friend owned. I worked down the street from him at a restaurant where I was the head chef. We always planned to one day open up our own restaurant where he'd bartend and I'd cook." She smiled at the memory before shaking her head.

Julian tensed at the thought that she was beginning to close herself off. He wanted to reach over and hold her hand. He wanted to wipe the few tears that had fallen from her face. He wanted to hold her in his arms again. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to." He said quietly as he looked at her. She looked away from the picture she was holding and up at him.

"We were together almost seven years. At eighteen when I first met him I never imagined I'd spend the next seven years with him. I was scared he was going to hurt me like Lucas had but he didn't. He was the kind of man who would do anything to protect the ones he loved and that was why I loved him so much. I could see him out in the yard playing with our kids, I could see him reading bedtime stories and making different voices for all the characters. A year ago we bought a house together. It wasn't anything special, it needed a lot of fixing up but that was how we spent out weekends. I loved that house," She said quietly. "I loved it until that night."

Julian furrowed his brow. What night? What had happened? He watched as she placed the frame on the nightstand and repositioned herself on the bed. "Tell me about Kate." She said as she now faced him.

"What about you? What about Owen? What happened that night?" He asked.

"I'll tell you." She said. "But I'm not going to be the only one discussing my past. If I let you in you need to let me in."

He nodded as he stared down at the comforter. "I first saw her in first grade. It took me a whole year to get the nerve up to go and talk to her. We were inseparable growing up. In high school I saw her differently. I didn't see my best friend anymore, I saw a pretty girl who I wanted to date and keep to myself. I didn't want another guy to be with her because I was certain I wouldn't be able to handle that. Both of our parents always joked while we were growing up that we'd end up together. Sophomore year we did." Brooke noticed the smile on his face as he talked about his first love. "We planned to go away to college together, we got an apartment near campus and things were great. We found out she was pregnant with Olivia in January. Our parents weren't happy since we had just started college and had our whole lives still ahead of us but they eventually came around. Kate was beyond excited at first. She was always giddy and she'd talk to her belly all the time, I could watch her for hours. I remember how her face lit up that October night when she realized she was in labor and that it was time to meet our daughter. Olivia was born eighteen hours later." He glanced up at Brooke who was smiling at him. "Ten days later, Kate left me alone with Olivia and never came back." He watched as her smile disappeared. "What happened that night at the house?" He asked.

She looked at Owen's picture before speaking. "I woke up in the middle of the night because I was so hot I could barely breathe. I opened my eyes to see that flames were everywhere…the house was on fire. I screamed and Owen immediately woke up—" Julian watched as she slowly began to break down. Tears were pouring out of her eyes and he knew what she was about to say wasn't going to be good. Ignoring his better judgment, he wrapped his arms around her shaking form and pulled her into his embrace. "We were trapped in the room because the windows in our room were painted shut. Th-that was the next thing on our list to take care of." She cried against his chest.

Julian shook his head. "You don't have to tell me anything else." He whispered in her hair. He didn't want to put her through the agony of reliving what had happened six months prior.

"He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the room. I thought he was crazy as he pulled me over the threshold through the flames but I knew we had to get out of there. We were at the top of the stairs when he told me he'd be right back. I remember screaming at him to come back but he didn't. Flames were everywhere and I couldn't leave him. I ran after him." She itched her side and her shirt rode up allowing Julian to see her damaged skin again. He stared down at it, unable to look away. "The next thing I remember is waking up a few days later wrapped like a mummy in the hospital. Peyton and Lucas were there and so was my other friend Haley and her husband Nathan."

"What happened to Owen?" Julian wondered aloud as he continued to hold her in his arms.

"He died." She whispered quietly against his chest.

He felt his heart shatter into pieces upon hearing her words. He gently rocked her back and forth in an effort to comfort her when he heard her small voice again. "He ran back into our room because he needed to get something." He heard her say. "The paramedics found him with the ring box clutched in his hand when they discovered his body."

"Oh, Brooke," He whispered into her hair. "I am so sorry." He felt her nod at his words and he fought back the tears that were trying to escape his own eyes.

"And now, every time I look at myself in the mirror all I'm reminded of is that night. I should have screamed louder because then he would have turned around. I should have gotten to his side quicker. I should have made him take care of the windows in our room first. I should have checked the wiring in the house to make sure it wasn't faulty. I should have—"

"Shh," He hushed. "You did all you could have done—"

"But it wasn't enough!" She cried as she pulled out of his embrace. "I spent weeks in the hospital in complete agony because third degree burns covered 65% of my body and that pain didn't even compare to the emotional pain I was feeling. I spent hours contemplating how to end my own life so I could be with him. He was going to propose to me! I was supposed to be his wife! We were supposed to raise a family in that house!"

He watched as she began to spiral out of control. It was evident to him that she hadn't talked about the night of the fire since it had happened. She had gotten out of the bed and had begun to pace around the room all while screaming at him. As he listened to her he wondered if she would be able to move on from Owen, if she would be able to put Owen in the past and allow herself to be happy with a different man. With him.

"Stop!" She begged as he made his way toward her. "I don't want you to touch me!" He ignored her as he wrapped his arms around her for the second time that day. To his surprise, she latched on to him and buried her face in his neck. He could feel her hot tears trickling down his skin and soaking through his shirt. She picked up her head and stared into his eyes while tears continued to flow down her face. The next moment completely took him by surprise; her lips collided with his.

"I-I'm sorry." She stuttered as she pulled away from him. "I-I didn't mean to."

He stood, unable to move, and watched as she darted from her bedroom. The sound of the front door slamming brought him out of his trance. He raced down the staircase and out the front door to see her pulling the car door open.

"Brooke!" He yelled as he ran toward her.

She slipped into the driver's seat and fumbled with getting the key in the ignition. When she looked up, he was standing in front of the car preventing her from going anywhere.

"Don't run away from me," He pleaded. "Please."

She wiped her tears with the back of her hand. She was a mess. Her eyes were puffy and red from crying while little black rivers of mascara ran down her face.

"Ich glaube ich konnte in dich verlieben zu." He said slowly as he looked down at a piece of paper he had pulled from his pocket.

She stared at him through the windshield of the car. He had repeated what she had said to him days before although he had butchered a few words. Her hand shook as she opened the car door and her knees felt like jell-o as she walked toward him. "Do you know what you just said?" She asked.

"I hope I said 'I think I can fall in love with you, too'." He grinned.

"You did." She nodded. "How did you figure out what I had said?"

He stepped toward her. "Once we finished playing Go Fish I looked it up." He took her hands into his own and smiled.

"There's still a lot you need to know about me." She said as she looked down at her feet. "And, I'm in no way ready to jump into a relationship with you. I've only known you for ten days and—"

"Shh," He smiled as he brought a finger to her lips. "We'll take it one day at a time, okay? Whenever you're ready, I'll be here."

She nodded before turning on her heel and walking back toward the house. As she pulled out a pot to begin making chicken noodle soup for dinner she got to thinking. Owen had died six months ago. Part of her felt like she was moving on too quickly but the other part felt like it was about time. Owen wasn't coming back. He would want her to be happy and she could see herself being happy with Julian. They still had a lot to learn about the other and their pasts but what she had seen of Julian already, she loved. The way he ignored her pleads to go away. The way he wrapped his arms around her and rubbed her back when she cried. The way he didn't pressure her into talking about the night of the fire. The way he looked at her as if she was the most beautiful girl in the world despite the burn scars that covered most of her body. Maybe, she thought, she had lost Owen for a reason. Maybe he wasn't supposed to be the love of her life…maybe Julian was.

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	7. Chili

Chapter Seven: Chili

He had to get back to work. He hadn't been in the office much at all since Brooke came into his life. As he sat at his desk, he couldn't concentrate. His mind was on the brunette who was probably at his house waking Olivia up for school at that very moment.

x-x-x-x-x-x

"Wake up, sleepy head." Brooke said softly as she sat down on the edge of Olivia's bed. She watched as the little girl stirred slightly from her sleep. "Good morning."

Olivia grinned as she stretched her arms. "Good morning."

"Did you sleep well?" Brooke asked.

Olivia nodded. "Did you?"

"Great." Brooke lied. She hadn't been sleeping for the past two nights since Julian had told her he'd wait for whenever she was ready. She was constantly replaying what had happened out in the driveway in her mind. "What do you feel like having for breakfast this morning?" She watched as Olivia suddenly catapulted out of bed and ran into the bathroom. "Olivia!" She yelled as she ran after her. She found her getting sick and crying. "It's okay, sweetie." She said softly as she gathered Olivia's hair and held it back as she continued to get sick.

"I'm sorry." Olivia whispered when she was finally done.

Brooke wrapped her in her arms and began to soothingly rock her back and forth. "You have nothing to be sorry about, bumblebee."

Olivia slightly grinned at her nickname. "Do I have to go to school today?"

Brooke shook her head. "You get to spend the day with me."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"Julian."

He turned to see his father standing in the doorway to his office. "What's up?" He asked.

Paul shut the door behind him before walking toward his son. "What's going on with you?"

Julian furrowed his brow. "What do you mean?"

"Today's the first day in two weeks that you've actually showed up to work on time and stayed longer than an hour but you're still distracted. I'm not paying you to stare out the window at the Los Angeles skyline, you know."

He nodded. "I know about Brooke. She told me."

Paul ran his hand through his hair. "What happened? Your mother tried to ask her but she wouldn't say anything."

"There was a house fire and her boyfriend died after he ran back to get the engagement ring he had bought for her." Julian sighed.

Paul sank down in a chair. "Oh my god," He whispered as he shook his head. "How can she be okay?"

Julian shrugged. "She said that she constantly thinks about it but since I hired her it's been better because Olivia has taken her mind off of everything."

"You have, too." He grinned.

He shook his head. "I'm pretty sure I ruined everything with her."

Paul cocked his eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"She kissed me and then ran away. I knew she was vulnerable but I couldn't help it, I told her things I should have kept to myself. I told her that I think I could fall in love with her and no matter how long it takes for her to be ready to be in a relationship, I'll wait."

He stared at his son waiting for more. When he didn't say anything, Paul couldn't help but laugh quietly.

"This isn't funny, dad!" Julian exclaimed.

"What is so wrong with what you told her? Sounded pretty damn good to me."

He sighed. "This isn't a movie though, dad. It's not like the scripts we read and put into production. Things aren't going to work not perfectly, we're not characters in some storyline and I'm not granted a happy ending. I mean it's been two days since we talked and every time she's near me I can tell how uncomfortable she is and I know what I said to her is the reason. I don't know how to fix it."

"Who says there's anything to be fixed?" Paul asked.

"Dad," Julian sighed. "You're really not helping."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Olivia had told her she'd be okay long enough to take a shower. After standing outside the bathroom for about five minutes, Brooke was finally convinced. She went downstairs and began moving some of the furniture around in the living room. If Julian were to come home and see her moving his furniture around, she knew he would have a fit but she really didn't care. When she heard the water stop, she finished moving the ottoman and then darted up the stairs to help Olivia get dressed.

"I didn't get sick at all while I was in the shower!" Olivia said proudly when Brooke entered her room.

She couldn't help but smile. "Good girl." Her smile quickly faded when she saw Olivia cover her mouth and dart back toward the bathroom. She held her hair and rubbed her back while the little girl got sick.

"Why do I keep throwing up?" Olivia asked once she was done.

"You just have a little flu bug. It should be gone in the next couple of days."

"Flu bug?" Olivia exclaimed. "Is it inside of me? How did it get in—"

"It's just a saying, you know like has anyone ever said that they have a frog in their throat?"

Olivia shook her head.

"You just have the flu which is when you don't feel good and you get sick but the good thing about having the flu is that you get to drink yummy ginger ale and get pampered until you get better." Brooke smiled as she helped Olivia into a clean pair of pajamas.

She wrapped her little arms around Brooke's neck. "Well, I'm glad you're here because if you weren't nobody would take care of me."

"That's not true," Brooke said as she shook her head. "Your daddy—"

"He wouldn't know what to do. He never does."

Brooke fought back the tears she could feel in her eyes. "He loves you a lot, Olivia." She said as she looked into her eyes. "I know that he's not really around a lot but when he comes home at night he always kisses you goodnight and in the mornings he kisses you goodbye before whispering in your ear to have a good day. He loves you; he just doesn't know how to show it."

"I wish he did." Olivia said sadly.

Brooke rocked her in her arms. "One day he will."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

He groaned in frustration as he chucked his red pen at the wall opposite from him. He had been hunched over the same script for the past three hours and was only on the second scene. Brooke was on his mind instead of his work making it impossible to concentrate on the script in front of him. All it took was one glance at the top desk drawer and before he knew it he was dialing her number. He knew what he was doing was wrong and that he'd regret it in a few hours but he didn't care.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

"This is so cool!" Olivia shrieked as she and Brooke sat in the fort they had constructed out of blankets.

Brooke smiled. "Does it feel like you're camping?"

"You remembered?"

She nodded. "I remember everything you tell me."

Olivia snuggled in closer to Brooke as she pressed play on the portable DVD player they had brought into the fort. Olivia was exhausted despite getting plenty of sleep the previous night. Not even fifteen minutes into Finding Nemo and Olivia was out cold in her arms. She stared down at the sleeping girl in her arms and smiled before dozing off herself.

He was confused when he walked into his house. The living room had been transformed and he could hear nothing but the voices of Lightning McQueen and Mater. He knelt down and peered inside the fort to see Olivia cuddled in Brooke's embrace. It was one o'clock in the afternoon and Olivia should be in school. He carefully nudged Brooke making sure not to disturb Olivia. Brooke woke with a jolt and it took her a second to remember where she was. When she saw him she was even more confused. She carefully moved Olivia making sure to wake her before crawling out of the fort.

"What is she doing home?" He asked once they were in the kitchen.

"She has the flu."

His demeanor instantly changed. "Is she okay? Did you give her Tylenol? Ginger ale for her stomach—"

Brooke nodded. "Don't worry, I've got everything covered."

He smiled. "You know, you're the best nanny Julian's ever hired."

"Olivia makes it easy." Brooke shrugged.

Paul nodded. "Seeing you with her, I just, I can see…"

Brooke cocked her head to the side when he shook his head and trailed off. "You can see what?"

"Nothing." He replied as he shook his head. "It's nothing."

"Paul," She smiled. "Tell me."

"I have never seen Olivia as happy as I've seen her since you've come into her life. She's a completely different person now, one that Diane and I can't get enough of and watching her with you sometimes takes my breath away. I feel as though you are mother and daughter and—"

"I never meant to overstep that boundary, Paul—"

He placed his hand on top of hers. "I know you didn't but I am so glad you did." He smiled. "Watching her grow up without a mother for the past five years has been heartbreaking but it was all worth it because I can see how happy she is now and that's what matters. I know that you are nowhere near ready to become romantically involved with my son but just know that he will wait forever if he has to."

"Why would he do that?"

"That's for me to know and you to figure out." He winked.

Brooke sighed in frustration. "What if when—if we do, something happens and we break up? How am I supposed to continue being Olivia's nanny? What if he falls for someone else while he's waiting for me? What if he—"

"You can't live your life thinking about all the what ifs because while you're doing that, life is passing you by. There's always a chance that you could get hurt but there's also the chance that everything will work out and you'll get that happy ending you always see in the movies. You never know what's going to happen and I know that can be scary but I also know taking a chance can change your entire life for the better." Paul said softly as he cupped his hand over hers once again.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Brooke had made Paul lunch and they had talked a bit more before he returned to the office. He had promised not to say anything to Julian about their little talk. Olivia had slept for most of the day; she woke up a few times to drink some ginger ale and take more medicine. She had been up in bed for a little bit while Brooke was down in the kitchen cooking up a storm. She looked up and was surprised to see him standing in front of her. He looked a mess, she thought to herself, as she stood awkwardly behind the counter waiting for him to make the first move.

"I did something today that I can't take back." He said in a voice that didn't sound like his own.

She placed the mixing bowl down on the counter and wiped her hands on her apron. "Okay," She said warily. "Do you want to talk about it?"

He nodded and then shook his head. "I can't." He said as he sank down at the table and buried his head in his hands.

She ladled some chili into a bowl for him before carefully sitting down across from him. She pushed the bowl toward him but he didn't look up. "Julian," She said softly.

He suddenly stood up. "I shouldn't have done it, I know that!" He exclaimed.

"What did you do?"

He shook his head. "I can't tell you."

"Why not?" She asked as she cocked her head to the side.

He began to pace. "Because I don't want to hurt you."

Her head was spinning. She didn't understand what he meant and his vagueness wasn't helping. She wanted to know what he was talking about but she knew better than to press him for information he wasn't ready to share. She stood up and walked out of the kitchen and up the staircase toward her bedroom leaving Julian alone in the kitchen.

When he heard her door close he reached for the bowl of chili and chucked it across the room. When the porcelain bowl came into contact with the wall, it shattered into several pieces and he watched as the red substance slid down white wall. He sank down at the table, buried his head in his hands and for the first time that day he allowed himself to cry.

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Review please!


	8. Pancakes

**I know it's been forever since I updated and I'm so sorry for that! Hopefully this long review makes up for the lack of updates! Also, if anyone has any ideas for future chapters let me know! I'm really interested in what you guys want to see! Enjoy!**

Chapter Eight: Pancakes

She really didn't want to have to go back downstairs and face Julian but Olivia needed more medicine. She took a deep breath before descending down the staircase. He was crying softly, she noticed, at the kitchen table with his head in his hands. She hoped that she could sneak into the kitchen and he wouldn't notice because he was crying. Her plan didn't work.

"Brooke," His voice cracked as he tried to wipe his eyes. "What are you doing down here?"

"Olivia needs more medicine."

He stood up. "Is she okay? What's wrong?"

Brooke poured some juice into a cup before measuring out the medicine. "She has the flu so she stayed home from school today. She's okay, she's just throwing up a lot and she has a fever that I'm trying to break."

He followed her up to Olivia's room asking her more questions about his daughter. He pushed the door open and ran toward a groggy Olivia. "She's burning up, Brooke," He said as he felt her forehead. "I think we should go to the hospital or something."

She shook her head. "It's just a fever, Julian." She said as she sat down on the edge of the bed. "Here sweetie," She said as she handed Olivia the cup of medicine. They both watched as Olivia downed the pink liquid making a disgusted face before reaching for the cup of juice Brooke had brought up. "Good girl." Brooke smiled. "Now why don't you get some rest bumblebee and we'll see you in the morning, okay?"

Olivia nodded as Brooke tucked her in before leaning down to give her a kiss on the forehead.

"I love you, mommy."

Brooke's eyes immediately locked with Julian's before she looked down at the sleeping girl. She didn't know what she was saying, she was sick, and tired, and out of it. Olivia didn't mean it. Brooke snuck out of the room while Julian was staring at his little girl. She walked into the kitchen and saw for the first time the mess of the chili all over the wall and floor.

"You don't have to clean that up." He said.

She turned at the sound of his voice. "All you had to do was toss it in the trash if you didn't like it. I won't make it again, don't worry."

"I didn't throw it because I didn't like it. I was mad. I'm still mad." He said as he bent down to help her clean up his mess. "I'm sorry."

She stopped picking up the broken porcelain pieces. "What could possibly make you this upset? Throwing a bowl of chili? Crying in the dark at the kitchen table? What did you do, Julian?"

Tears were forming in his eyes and he tried his hardest not to let her see but she did. "I hate myself, Brooke."

She knew better than to push him but she had to. He was clearly struggling and she wanted to help him more than anything. "Why?"

He locked eyes with her. "I slept with someone today." He said in a voice barely above a whisper.

She stared at him for what seemed like forever before she stood up, tossed the broken porcelain pieces in the trash and walked out of the kitchen. He listened again as she walked up the stairs and shut her bedroom door. He squeezed the porcelain pieces in his hand so tight that the edges dug into his skin causing him to bleed. The physical pain he felt didn't compare in the slightest to the emotional pain that was tearing him up inside.

She didn't let herself cry until she closed her bedroom door. She braced herself against her dresser and stared at herself in the mirror as she watched the tears fall from her eyes. She was angry at herself for believing that he would wait. He had told her that was who he was from the very beginning so why had she expected him to change for her? Diane had warned her. Paul had warned her. Julian had warned her.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

He left early the next morning. He popped his head into Brooke's room to see her sleeping soundly before checking on his daughter. Her forehead wasn't hot anymore which made him breathe a sigh of relief. All he could think about as he looked at his daughter was what she had mumbled last night to Brooke. He cursed himself under his breath knowing he had screwed everything up by sleeping with a girl from his past. Although he and Brooke were far from anything there was the possibility that they could have become a family. Not anymore; not after what he had done the day before in a moment of weakness.

She did what she did best when she was upset. She cooked. Olivia came down to see the kitchen full of breakfast foods. Her eyes bulged as she raced to the kitchen counter.

Brooke smiled when she saw her reach for a fork and start eating. "Looks like you're feeling better." She said.

Olivia nodded. "I only threw up once last night but I feel all better now!" She exclaimed. "Can I go back to school?"

"Let's see what your temperature is first." She replied as she held up the thermometer. Olivia opened her mouth and lifted up her tongue allowing Brooke to put it in place. "98.6 degrees." She said after the thermometer beeped.

"Is that good?"

Brooke nodded. "You're back to normal."

Olivia squealed and began to jump up and down in the middle of the kitchen. She stopped suddenly and looked up at Brooke. "What are you going to do today? Will you be lonely?"

She shook her head. "I'll be fine." She assured her. "I have some things to do around the house anyway."

Olivia nodded as she continued to eat the pancakes Brooke had made. The doorbell rang which confused both of them. "I'll get it while you finish eating. We have to get moving if we want to get to school on time." Brooke said as she made her way toward the front door. She opened it and saw two people she hadn't expected. "What are you doing here?" She asked as her voice cracked.

"We're worried about you, Brooke." Haley said as she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around her friend.

Brooke wiped her eyes. "I'm fine."

Peyton hugged Brooke before stepping back and placing her hands on her hips. "You are not fine. Calling us in the middle of the night and leaving a message full of nothing but hushed cries and deep breathing is a cry for help. What's going—"

"I finished all the pancakes!" Olivia announced proudly as she ran into the foyer to see Brooke, Haley and Peyton. "Hi." She said shyly.

"These are some of my friends from back home, Peyton and Haley." Brooke explained as she bent down to Olivia's level. "Why don't you go start the shower and I'll be up in a few minutes to help you get ready for school, okay?"

Olivia nodded before bounding up the staircase to get ready. While Brooke watched her, Peyton and Haley watched Brooke in confusion. "I made breakfast so why don't you guys go eat before it gets cold while I help Olivia get ready for school? She ate all the pancakes so I'm sorry if you wanted—"

"Brooke." Haley cut her off. "What is going on?"

She shook her head. "It's a long story and I'll explain later." She said as she led them toward the kitchen. "Enjoy and I'll be back down in a few."

Haley and Peyton reached for plates as they watched their friend head upstairs toward the little girl. "What the hell?" Peyton asked as she shook her head. "She has a kid now? And lives in a mansion? When did this all happen and how?"

Haley shrugged. "I'm sure she's going to explain once that little girl is at school. What do you think happened?"

"I have no idea." Peyton replied as she munched on a piece of bacon. "But she's clearly upset because she cooked enough for a small army." She said as she motioned around the kitchen. "We haven't talked in almost a month because I've been so busy I haven't been able to return her calls."

Haley nodded. "I know I have too. I feel terrible, maybe if we had returned her calls we would know what's going on and how and why her life has changed so much." She squirted ketchup onto her eggs. "I miss her, Peyton."

"I do too."

Before Haley and Peyton knew it, Brooke and Olivia were back downstairs. "Do you guys want to come with me while I go to drop her off? I'd let you stay here but if Julian were to come home and find two strange girls in the house—"

Peyton grabbed her purse. "Of course we'll come." She smiled as she and Haley followed Brooke out of the house.

Olivia was wary when Peyton sat down beside her in the backseat of the car. It was clear to Peyton that she was avoiding eye contact but she just shrugged it off as shyness on Olivia's part. "Brooke?" Olivia's voice was laced with apprehension.

Brooke looked through the rearview mirror. "Yes, bumblebee?"

"Are you leaving me?"

She shook her head. "Of course not; why would you think that?"

Olivia shrugged. "Your friends are here now. I don't want you to go back home with them and leave me here all by myself."

She pulled the car off to the side of the road and put it in park before turning around to face Olivia and Peyton. Haley eyed Peyton out of the corner of her eye unsure of what was transpiring before them. Brooke placed her hand gently on Olivia's leg. "I'm never going to leave you. I love you way too much to ever do that to you. You're my little bumblebee—"

"And you're my mommy!" She finished.

Brooke glanced at Haley and Peyton who both had wide eyes and were staring back at her. "I'm not your mom, sweetheart." She said gently. "I'm—"

Olivia shook her head. "Yes you are. You love me, you make me yummy foods, you spend time with me, and you tuck me in at night. You do all the things a mommy does!"

Brooke inhaled deeply. "You're right, I do all that for you but that doesn't make me a mom. I care about and love you more than you will ever know but I'm not your mom, I'm your nanny." It killed her to say that to Olivia but she had to, she wasn't her mom no matter how badly she wanted to be.

"Why are you crying?"

She hadn't noticed she was doing so and quickly wiped her eyes. "You know I love you, right?"

Olivia nodded. "To the moon and back."

Brooke turned around and put the car in drive. The ride was quiet until they were almost at the school. Olivia's voice was small but full of hope.

"What if you married daddy? Thenwould you be my mommy?"

Brooke caught Peyton's eye as she looked in the rearview mirror. She knew Olivia had trapped Brooke. She slowly nodded.

A smile spread across Olivia's face and Brooke was thankful to be at the school. She got out, unbuckled Olivia and reached for her backpack.

"Why'd she shut the door?" Haley asked as she and Peyton peered out the window of the car.

Peyton laughed. "She probably doesn't want us eavesdropping."

"She's going to tell us everything anyway so what does it matter?"

"Sweetie," Brooke said as she crouched down to Olivia's level. "I didn't mean to upset you in the car it's just—"

"It's okay." Olivia smiled. "You may not be my mommy now but you will be someday."

Brooke nodded unsure of what to say. "C'mon," She said as she stood up and reached for Olivia's hand. "I don't want you to be late."

She could see her two best friends laughing in the car as she walked back toward them. She missed them so much and although she would never admit it aloud, she was so glad they knew her as well as they did and that they had come. She needed them.

"So," Haley said as she watched Brooke slide back in the car. "You have a lot of explaining to do."

Peyton nodded in agreement and Brooke smiled. "I know." She said quietly.

A short while later they were at the beach. It was pretty empty considering how early it was and the fact that it was mid-November. Brooke had purposefully driven to the beach instead of back to the house in case Julian was to come home. She doubted he would given how they had left things the previous evening but she couldn't be sure.

"How'd you know where to find me?" Brooke asked as the three of them walked along the shore.

"We went to your old apartment expecting to find you there but you obviously weren't so we asked the landlady and she gave us your forwarding address." Peyton answered. "We were sure we had the wrong address when we pulled up to the house, I mean given where you were living before to where you are now, it's insane!"

Brooke laughed. "I know, everything has changed so fast." She proceeded to explain how she had come across Olivia in the park that one morning and how they had bonded so quickly. She told them about how cold and rude Julian had been that first day and how he had offered her a job since Olivia no longer had a nanny. "He made me feel comfortable and he's the first man since Owen that I've had feelings for."

Haley and Peyton stopped walking. "Seriously?" Peyton asked. "That's great, Brooke!"

Brooke shook her head. "And I thought that he felt the same way based on the way we flirted and whatnot but I was so wrong."

Haley furrowed her brow. "What do you mean?"

Brooke sank down in the sand and stared out at the vast ocean in front of her. "He saw my scars." She said quietly. Haley and Peyton glanced nervously at each other before sitting down on either side of their best friend. "I told him about Owen and what happened and how the only thing I wanted for days after the fire was to die so I could be with him. He's the only person besides you guys and Nate and Luke who knows what happened. I trusted him. I thought that by letting him in like that we'd become closer but I should have known. His mom and dad both warned me, _he_ even warned me but I didn't listen." She said as she shook her head. "I should have never kissed him in that moment of weakness after I told him about Owen. He said he'd wait no matter how long it took for me to be ready to be with him."

Haley reached for Brooke's hand. "What happened?"

"He slept with someone yesterday."

Peyton wrapped her arm around Brooke and rubbed her back as Brooke cried. Haley looked at Peyton who shrugged slightly. Neither of them knew what to do. Brooke pulled away and wiped her eyes. "Maybe I scared him off when I told him that I was saving myself for marriage. He clearly has a lot of experience; I mean he slept with every nanny he hired to take care of Olivia. What if he thought I wouldn't be good in bed so he purposefully sabotaged the idea of us one day getting together?" She rambled.

"You told him you haven't had sex?" Peyton asked with wide eyes. "How exactly did that topic come up?"

Brooke shrugged. "His mom warned me to be careful with my heart and she told me about his past with the previous nannies so I confronted him. I told him I wouldn't be just another girl to sleep with and that I was saving myself. I never planned on telling him; it just sort of slipped out."

Haley took a deep breath. "You know better than anyone that Nathan was a bad guy when I first met him but he changed. I know how scary it can be thinking that when you're finally ready that he's going to compare you to the people he's slept with before. I don't know Julian but based off what you've told me I feel like he is very similar to whom Nathan used to be. But I changed him and I think you can change Julian. It won't be overnight and at times you're going to just want to walk away but in the end you'll realize it was worth it. I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you—"

"Haley," Peyton scoffed. "You know that's a bunch of bullshit."

Haley shook her head. "That's who he has been his entire life. He's the guy that sleeps around and is afraid to make a commitment because he doesn't want to get hurt. But now, after he did what he did, I'm sure he's kicking himself because he's realized what he could potentially lose. The fact that he was down in the kitchen crying proves it because I doubt he ever did that after sleeping with girls before you walked into his life."

Brooke nodded against Haley's shoulder. "So where do I go from here?"

"You continue to care for and love Olivia. Whatever happens or doesn't happen with Julian happens. That little girl loves you more than you'll ever know, Brooke." Peyton smiled.

"I know." She agreed. "When do you guys have to go back?"

"Our plane leaves in three hours." Haley frowned.

"Seriously?"

Haley and Peyton both nodded.

"I feel so stupid for calling you guys and making you fly all the way across the country for a day—"

"You didn't make us do anything." Peyton corrected. "You're our best friend and you needed us. We'd do anything for you, Brooke." She got up and walked down to the edge of the water leaving Brooke alone with Haley.

"Things aren't so great with her and Lucas." Haley said quietly. Brooke stared in disbelief. "I think that's why she hasn't been as caring as she could have been today, she's doesn't really believe in love anymore."

"Are they getting divorced?"

Haley shrugged. "Not yet but I wouldn't be surprised if they did. He spends a lot of time up in New York with his publisher and editors while she's at home trying to raise Abby and he wasn't there for her like he should have been when they lost the baby."

"She had a miscarriage?" Brooke could barely get the words out.

Haley's eyes went wide. "She didn't tell you?"

Brooke shook her head. "I haven't seen her since I left and I just assumed she had given birth to him already—I—I should have called and checked in. I should have—"

Haley wrapped her arm around Brooke's shoulder. "She was ashamed and embarrassed and heartbroken. She probably didn't want to burden you."

"But I'm her best friend. She shouldn't have felt like she was going to burden me that's what I'm here for; her problems are supposed to be my problems and vice versa."

Haley nodded sadly. "We've all kind of drifted apart."

"It wasn't supposed to happen."

"I know."

"Do you ever wish you could go back to when we were eighteen and didn't have a care in the world? When everything seemed so much easier and anything was possible?"

"At times." Haley said softly. "But then I look at Nathan interact with Jamie and I think about how far we've come and I feel a sense of accomplishment. Anything is still possible and I have a feeling the world doesn't stand a chance against you, Brooke."

Brooke nodded. "I've really missed you."

"I've missed you too."

Peyton walked back toward Haley and Brooke and the three of them started back toward the car so Brooke could drop them off at the airport. Haley pulled out her phone and called Nathan so Brooke could have a moment with Peyton before they had to leave. "You know that even though I live on the other side of the country you're still my best friend, right?" Brooke asked.

Peyton nodded. "I know."

"Don't give up on your marriage; you and Luke are better than that. Abby deserves better than that, Peyton." She said as she stepped closer and wrapped her arms around her one final time. "He's up there watching over you, P. Sawyer." She whispered in her best friend's ear.

Peyton pulled away with tears in her eyes and nodded. "I'm know."

Haley made her way toward the two of them and gave Brooke one final hug. "Give him a chance. He made a mistake and he knows that. For all you know he could be the one you were meant for and it's your turn for happily ever after."

Brooke watched as Peyton and Haley walked into the airport and sighed. She missed them more than they'd ever know. While their visit had been just what she needed it also reminded her just how alone she was.

Olivia helped her make dinner and when she had set the table Brooke told her to only set two places. Julian wouldn't be home for dinner. Just as she was bringing the mashed potatoes to the table she heard the door open. He stopped in the doorway and smiled when he heard Olivia squeal and jump to her feet. He locked eyes with Brooke who surprisingly smiled at him. Olivia began talking a mile a minute about her day and Julian watched as Brooke retrieved another place setting from the cabinet and set it on the table. She sat down and he and Olivia followed suit. Olivia didn't stop talking. She told him about Peyton and Haley who had visited which caused Julian to glance curiously at Brooke. He knew that they had a lot to discuss but he had hope. She hadn't shut him out like he had expected and that made him that much closer to getting the happily ever after he never thought he deserved until now.

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	9. Omelets

Chapter Nine: Omelets 

The previous night had gone better than he had expected. After dinner, Olivia went to change into her pajamas while Brooke started to clean up the kitchen. Julian had debated on going up to help Olivia or to stay and help Brooke clean up. He had chosen to stay. At first she was reluctant and avoided eye contact with him but when he made it clear that he wasn't leaving she started to let her guard back down. They hadn't talked at all while cleaning the kitchen but she at least allowed him to stand close to her again. As he lay in bed the next morning, he couldn't help but smile to himself. It was Saturday and he planned to stay home and spend the day with his daughter and Brooke. He was going to prove to her that he wanted to be with her and he would do whatever it took until she realized that.

He knew he wasn't the best cook but he wanted to do something so Brooke wouldn't have to when she woke up. He stretched before getting out of bed and heading downstairs. Out of habit he glanced into the living room and was surprised to see her sitting on the couch sipping a cup of coffee while reading the newspaper. She hadn't looked up yet so he stared a few seconds longer. Her hair was in a messy ponytail and she didn't have a trace of make-up on. Her pajamas didn't match but he could care less. This was when she was her most beautiful, he thought, when she wasn't trying.

"Morning," He greeted as he walked toward her. "How'd you sleep?"

She put the paper down beside her on the couch and placed her coffee mug on the table. He realized it wasn't coffee but tea rather and smiled. "Okay," She replied. "Do you want breakfast?"

He held up his hand as she started to get up. "Don't worry about it. I've got it covered."

She looked at him suspiciously but didn't say anything. He had noticed that she was keeping the talk to a minimum this morning. The doorbell rang which caused Julian to smile and Brooke to look even more confused. From where she was in the living room it was impossible to see who was at the door but within seconds Julian closed the door and held up a brown take-out bag.

"Did you seriously have breakfast delivered?" She asked in disbelief.

"Well," He shrugged. "The last time I tried to cook something it didn't turn out so well so I figured it was better to be safe than sorry."

"I _can_ cook, you know." She said as she followed him into the kitchen. "I don't mind doing it either. It helps calm me down and—"

"I just wanted to do something nice for you." He said cutting her off. "Is there something wrong with that?"

She looked at him skeptically before shaking her head. "No, I guess not."

Olivia came running down the staircase just as Julian finished pulling out the last of the food. "I'm ready!" She exclaimed.

"Ready for what?" Julian asked as he took into account the overnight bag she had slung over her small shoulder.

"To go to grandma and grandpa's house, remember?" She asked as she placed her hands on her hips. "You forgot, didn't you?"

Julian glanced at Brooke who shrugged. Both of them had obviously forgotten that Paul had offered to take Olivia for the weekend a few days earlier. Julian reached for his keys and smiled at his daughter. "Let's go, Olivia Rae."

Olivia smiled and reached up for her father's hand. She saw Brooke standing in the kitchen as they made their way toward the front door she stopped short. "Aren't you coming with us?" She asked.

The ride to Paul and Diane's house wasn't bad because Olivia was there acting as a buffer. She had no idea that her dad and Brooke were uncomfortable around each other. The ride home on the other hand, Brooke was dreading. She would be stuck in the car less than two feet away from Julian with nowhere to run if she became uncomfortable. As she waited in the car for Julian to return from dropping Olivia off she contemplated walking home. She knew she was being ridiculous but she was not looking forward to spending the weekend alone with Julian. Why this weekend of all weekends had Paul and Diane offered to take Olivia? She sighed heavily when she saw Julian reappear. She ran a hand through her messy hair and turned so that her back was to the driver's seat and gazed out the window. She heard him open his door, slide in and sigh. "I know you're upset." He said softly. "And I am so sorry for being the reason you are so angry."

"I'm not angry, Julian." She said. "I'm hurt. There's a difference."

He placed his hand on her lower back. "Look at me, Brooke." He pleaded.

"Can we please just go home?" She asked with her back still toward him. "Please."

He didn't want to push her anymore so he gave in and started home. The ride was silent, Brooke was grateful and Julian was kicking himself. When he pulled into the driveway before he even got a chance to turn the car off she darted out and ran toward the house. Clearly, he thought, things were worse than he had originally thought. The only reason she had seemed okay last night was because Olivia was around, she didn't want his daughter to think anything was wrong. Surprisingly, he found her in the kitchen packaging up the omelets he had had delivered. "We could heat those up." He said as he stood in the doorway.

"I'm not that hungry." She replied.

"Brooke," He said as he made his way toward her. "We need to talk."

"It's fine." She said as she placed the containers in the fridge.

He shook his head. "No, it's not. We need to get past this so that we can move forward, we need—"

She slammed her fist down on the counter. "You want to talk? You want to understand why I'm feeling the way I am? Why I'm trying to avoid you? You really want to get into this, Julian?"

He nodded. "I do."

She left him alone in the kitchen and began walking toward the living room. He was unsure if he should follow but when he saw her turn around and look at him and motion her hand toward her he made his way into the living room. She waited for him to sit down first and when he sat down in the armchair she sat on the couch opposite him; the small coffee table being the only thing that separated them. "So," Julian sighed as he leaned forward and began nervously squeezing his hands. "Where do we start?"

"Who was she?"

"Who was who?"

Brooke groaned. "The girl you slept with, don't play dumb."

"Sarah Collins. She was the previous nanny."

"The one who left Olivia in the park?"

Julian nodded.

"Unbelievable," Brooke scoffed as she rolled her eyes.

"It's who I am, Brooke!" He exclaimed as he jumped to his feet. "I don't know how to change it but I want to!"

"Why?" She challenged. "Why now all of a sudden?"

"Because I know if I keep doing it I'm going to lose you and I don't want to."

"How many other girls have you slept with?"

"In my whole life?"

Brooke nodded.

He shrugged. "I don't keep count but if I had to guess I'd say probably around forty or fifty."

She wasn't sure why she had asked the question because when she heard his answer she felt like she couldn't breathe. Julian must have noticed something was wrong because before she knew it he was by her side, rubbing her back and telling her to breathe. "I'm scared." She said softly.

"Of what?"

"Of you and the way you make me feel."

"Why?"

She sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. "I should really hate you. I should want nothing to do with you because of what you did but I don't. I can't. There's something about you that puts me at ease. When I'm lying in bed I crave the feeling of you next to me, rubbing my back and holding me. I shouldn't want that but I do. I want you and that scares me to death."

He looked at her and furrowed his brow.

"I've told you things that nobody besides my best friends know, I trusted you. I told you about Owen. I let you see the scars from the fire. I told you that I was saving myself for marriage and you said that you would wait for however long it took. You told me that you think you could fall in love with me. You flirted with me. You made me fall for you and what do you do? You go and sleep with a girl from your past. You screwed everything up."

It killed him to see her cry. It destroyed him to know that he was the reason she was crying. He pressed his forehead against hers and held her face in his hands. "I wish I could take it back. I never meant to hurt you, Brooke."

She pulled away and looked him in the eye. "If you never meant to hurt me you wouldn't have slept with Sarah in the first place. Thinking about being with intimate with someone scares me because I will have no idea what I'm doing when the time comes. You took advantage of that. You said you'd wait but then you go and screw some girl—"

"It's what I do when I get scared."

Brooke stared at him. "What?"

"What I feel for you scares me. You haven't even been here a month and I have already fallen so hard for you. Seeing you with Olivia only makes me more attracted to you." Brooke could see tears starting to form in his eyes but he refused to let them fall. "When Kate left me I changed for the worse. I couldn't look at my daughter and I buried myself in work because I thought that would fill the void Kate left in my life but it didn't. I didn't realize that until you came into my life. I know I still have a long way to go with Olivia but I'm so much more involved in her life today than I have been for the past five years. I'm happier and I feel like I have a new lease on life and that's all because of you. I dread leaving in the mornings but I look forward to coming home in the evenings because I know I'll get to see my two favorite girls." He smiled when he saw Brooke blush. "What I did was wrong, I never should have done it and I know I shouldn't make excuses but I want you to know why I did it. I hurt people before they have a chance to hurt me. It's something I started doing right after Kate left me. I do it because I don't want to feel the way I did after she left. I don't want to be left alone again—"

"I'm not going anywhere, Julian." She said softly as she cupped his face with her hand.

He nodded as he pressed his forehead against hers. "Promise?"

"I promise."

"Good because I don't know what I'd do if you ever did."

"You need to earn my trust back." She said.

"I know."

"No more sleeping around either."

He shook his head. "I'm done with that."

"We have to take things slow; we can't just jump right into a relationship. You have to woo me and—"

He couldn't help but laugh. "Woo you?"

She nodded. "What's so wrong with that?"

"I don't know what that is or how to do it."

"You've never wooed a girl?" She smirked.

"Never." He grinned. "What am I supposed to do?"

She shrugged. "That's for you to figure out."

He thought for a moment before leaning in close to her. "Go take a shower and put on something nice." He whispered in her ear as a grin spread across his face.

"What are we doing?"

"We're going on a date." His grin grew even bigger.

Her smile matched his as she jumped to her feet and raced up the stairs. He watched her and shook his head. How had he gotten so lucky? She was still there and willing to give him a second chance. He wasn't going to screw it up this time. There was nothing to be afraid of anymore, she wasn't going anywhere and neither was he. He knew they had a long way to go but he was willing to go the distance if it meant having Brooke by his side for the rest of his life.

x-x-x

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	10. Chef Salad

Chapter Ten: Chef Salad

Starting over was scary for her. She hadn't been on a first date in almost seven years. As she stood in front of the mirror applying the last of her makeup she couldn't ignore the feeling of butterflies in the pit of her stomach. Once she finished, she looked down at her outfit and took one final glance in the mirror before smiling to herself and heading back downstairs where she knew he was waiting.

He paced in the living room unable to get his nerves in check. He had gotten a second chance when he knew he didn't deserve it and he was not going to blow it this time. It scared and comforted him that he could see a future with Brooke. He hadn't felt that way about someone since Kate and he didn't want to get his heart broken again. The sound of heels clacking down the staircase brought him out of his trance and he looked to see her making her way toward him. His eyes bulged and he thought his heart had stopped beating for a few seconds. She looked stunning.

"It's too much, isn't it?" She asked self-consciously when she saw his reaction. "I can go change if—"

He reached out and squeezed her arm gently preventing her from going anywhere. "You look beautiful." He told her. The purple dress she had on hugged her body in all the right places and hit just above her knee. Her perfume was intoxicating and Julian could not get enough of it.

"So," She smiled. "Where are we going?"

He reached for her hand before leading her out of the house. "You really thing I'm going to tell you?" He grinned.

He pulled into an abandoned lot and he smiled when Brooke turned to look at him with a confused look on her face. "Can you tell me now where you're taking me?"

"You'll find out soon enough." He replied as he slowed the car down.

It came into view and her jaw dropped. "No way." She said as she looked out her window, at Julian and then back out the window.

He put the car in park, swung his door open and trotted over to her side of the car where he opened up her door and offered her his hand. She squeezed tighter as they approached the dock but instead of following him down the plank she stopped short. "C'mon," he encouraged as he held his hand out for her to take hold of again.

She shook her head. "I can't." She said as she stared down at the teal colored water.

"Don't worry, it's my boat. I didn't steal it." He joked but when he saw the seriousness in her eyes he stopped laughing. "Brooke, what's wrong?" He asked as he made his way back up the plank.

She shook her head and folded her arms over her chest as she looked anywhere but at him.

"Brooke," He pressed.

"It's embarrassing." She said quietly. "I feel so stupid."

He placed his hand on either side of her face forcing her to look at him. "You're not stupid, tell me what's wrong and I can fix it."

"I'm scared of the ocean." She said after a few moments of debating on whether or not she should tell him.

"You are?"

She nodded. "Yeah, ever since I was a little and a kid in my swimming class jumped off the dock and never resurfaced. It just swallowed him up."

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a tight embrace. "How come you didn't mention this before? We've been to the beach together."

She stared at the yacht. "That was different. Being safe on the shore and being on a boat in the middle of the ocean in deep water are two completely different things. What if I had to jump off the boat because something happened? What if I don't come up like that little boy? I'm scared to—"

"We don't have to go out on the boat." He said wrapping his arms tighter around her. "There are plenty of other things to do."

"No, you went through so much trouble of planning this. I'll be okay."

He didn't believe her. "It was no trouble at all. We can go down to the beach and have a picnic if you'd rather. I don't want to do something that is going to make you uncomfortable."

She looked at him and then at the boat. "Maybe it's time that I get over my fear, though. I mean, it's been 20 years."

"You're sure?" He asked skeptically.

"Only if you promise to keep me safe and let me squeeze your hand when I get scared which will probably be every ten seconds."

He grinned as he extended his hand to hers which he gently squeezed when she took hold. She was counting on him to protect her and keep her safe and he wasn't planning on letting her down. They neared the boat and he watched as she inspected it out of the corner of her eye. When she saw the name of the boat written elegantly she smiled and somehow felt safer. _Olivia Rae._ She squeezed his hand when the boat slightly rocked as the captain and crew got on. "It's okay." He said softly as he led her to the bow.

"And you said you went through no trouble at all." She laughed when she saw a table set elegantly for two at the bow of the boat. His yacht was massive, she had thought to herself as he led her through it. He could easily fit a hundred people on it comfortably yet she doubted he ever had more than a couple friends on at a time. "Brooke?" She shook her head at the sound of her name. "What are you thinking about in that pretty little head of yours?" He smiled.

"Have you brought the previous nannies onto your yacht?"

Her question had completely caught him off guard. He stared at her for a few seconds and contemplated on whether he should buy himself some time or just be upfront and honest with her. "Yes." His voice was low and shameful.

She let go of his hand and stood up but instantly regretted doing so. The reality of being on the boat hit her and she started to panic. "I need to get off!" She yelled. "I'm going to drown! Get me off!" He was by her side within seconds and even though he knew it was the last thing she wanted, he picked her up and carried her down to his cabin where she wouldn't be able to see the ocean anymore. "I can't breathe!" She cried as she began gasping for air. He instantly reached for the paper bag he kept by his bed in case of seasickness and held it up to her face and told her to breathe into it as he rubbed soothing circles on her back. Her breathing took a few minutes to return back to normal but when it did he couldn't help but smile at her and breathe a sigh of relief.

"What just happened?" She asked as she took in her new surroundings. "Where am I?"

He saw the panic return to her eyes. "You had a panic attack and you hyperventilated." He explained as he placed his hand on top of hers. "I brought you down into the cabin so you'd be away from the water. It's okay now. You're okay now."

She nodded at his words as she started to remember what had happened a few minutes earlier. She remembered why she had begun to panic and it was his fault. "How many?" She asked.

He eyed her. "How many what?"

"How many of them did you bring here?"

"All of them." He replied sheepishly.

She buried her head in her hands and the sight nearly broke his heart. "This isn't a game to me, Julian. What I feel for you is real and if you don't feel the same way about me then just let me go. Don't let me fall even harder just so you can rip the rug out from underneath me in a couple weeks or months when you get bored. I don't want to be just another nanny you bring onto the yacht that you wine and dine and romance. I'm not that kind of girl and—"

He pressed a finger against her lips, instantly shushing her. "You want the truth, right?" He asked softly. She nodded. "I brought them onto the boat because I wanted to show it off; I wanted them to see that I had more money than God, I wanted them to envy me. But with you, it's different. I know you could care less about how much money I have or don't have; you're not interested in any of that…you're interested in me and that's what scares me. No girl has ever been into just me and not me _and_ my money. I wanted to do something special because I think you deserve it. I've never had Pierre make dinner to be served out on the bow at a table set for two. I've never been so nervous to take a girl onto the boat until tonight because I've never had so much to lose."

She had never seen him so sincere before; the way he spoke to her made her realize how much he cared about her. There was so much conviction in his voice. So what if he had brought the previous nannies on the boat? That was his past and she wanted more than anything to be a part of his future. "I'm sorry." She said softly as she rubbed her thumb against his.

"For what?" He grinned.

"For constantly bringing up the past," She replied as she shrugged. "I know I shouldn't because it doesn't do anything but put us at odds but sometimes I just can't help myself."

He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "It's okay. I'd be curious too if I were you."

"You would?"

He nodded. "Are you okay here by yourself for a couple seconds?" He asked as he stood up.

"Yeah," She said from her spot in the middle of his bed. "I should be okay."

He smiled before heading into an adjoining room. "Julian?" She called a few moments later. "Do you have any Chap Stick I could use?"

"Yeah," He called back. "Top drawer next to the bed."

She leaned over careful not to lose her balance as the boat rocked back and forth slightly. She pulled the drawer open just as Julian returned. He saw her paled skin and he looked down into the drawer where her eyes were fixated. He felt his stomach flop and he silently cursed himself. The date was turning into a disaster all because of him and his stupid past. "Brooke, I can explain—"

"I don't think you have to." She replied as she looked up at him for the first time. "It's pretty self-explanatory." The Chap Stick may be in the drawer but there was no way in hell that Brooke was going to fish through the dozens of empty condom wrappers to find it. He leaned down and closed the drawer before looking at her. To his surprise she didn't look angry or upset, instead she was staring at something else.

"You ready to go back up to the bow?" He asked as he offered her his hand.

"Only on one condition." She smirked.

Ten minutes later they were seated at the table on the bow of the boat looking out at the ocean waiting for Pierre to serve the first course. "Are you going to take that thing off?" He asked as he reached for his beer.

"No way!" She exclaimed.

"Brooke," He laughed. "You look ridiculous."

"It's keeping me safe. You should have one on too, you know."

"The boat is keeping you safe not the lifejacket. The only time the lifejacket will keep you safe is if we have to jump into the ocean because, god forbid, something happened to the boat." He explained.

She shrugged. "I haven't freaked out yet, have I?"

He shook his head and couldn't help but laugh. He had thought she was joking when she had asked if she could put on the bright orange lifejacket down in his cabin but she had been dead serious. "You're something else, you know that?"

Brooke nodded proudly. "So," She said after taking a sip of her wine. "Does Olivia know that you named your yacht after her?"

He shook his head. "She doesn't even know I have a boat."

Brooke raised her brows. "She doesn't?"

"No, believe it or not we really didn't have much of a relationship before you showed up."

"You don't say," Brooke teased.

The sun was setting and Julian couldn't help but notice the glow the setting rays cast on Brooke. She looked like an angel and he felt like the luckiest man in the world as he sat next to her holding her hand. He squeezed it gently. "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay. I feel safe."

He smiled. "Because of the lifejacket?"

"No, because of you."

He couldn't resist her any longer, especially after the way she had just looked at him. He let go of her hand and cupped her face before leaning in to kiss her softly. Her hands snaked up to his face and he smiled into the kiss as she began to deepen it. When they finally pulled away from each other, they were surprised to see their chef salads sitting in front of them. He reached for her hand and squeezed it gently which made her smile.

The boat suddenly lurched forward which caused Brooke to cry out in fear. The look on her face was pure panic as she reached for Julian. "You're okay," He assured her as he wrapped her in his arms. Gary, the captain's right hand man, quickly made his way toward the couple. "You need to get downstairs!" He yelled.

"What's going on?" Julian asked. The sky suddenly changed; the sun had disappeared and black clouds took its place. Thunder boomed overhead and it smelled like rain.

"We're headed into a storm, choppy seas and high winds." Gary responded.

"Can't you tell Alan to turn around?"

Gary shook his head. "We're too far in. We're just going to have to ride it out, we'll probably be back to shore sometime tomorrow morning."

"Tomorrow morning?" Brooke repeated. Julian could feel her body starting to tremble. "It's going to be okay." He whispered into her ear before kissing the top of her head. "Let's get down to the cabin."

The rain started to come down in sheets. Within seconds they were both soaked and Julian quickly stood, scooped Brooke into his arms and headed toward his cabin. "What are we going to do?" She asked once they were out of the rain. "Are we going to crash?"

He shook his head. "We're in the middle of the ocean, there's nothing to crash into."

"What if the boat flips over? The wind and choppy seas could do that, couldn't they?"

"Brooke," He said as he placed both of his hands on her shoulders. "We are going to be fine. Alan is one of the best captains and he's not going to let anything happen to us. Everything is going to be okay."

He handed her a pair of his flannel pajamas and an oversized t-shirt which she took uncertainly. "You're soaking wet, you need to change." He explained. He led her to the bathroom where she struggled to maintain her balance and she cried out to Julian several times. He opened the door to see her sitting on the floor with her back against the wall and her face in her hands. She looked adorable in his pajamas even though she had that damn lifejacket strapped on over them. This was by far the worst first date ever, he thought to himself, as he bent down and picked her up. Carefully, he laid her down on his bed before walking to the other side and climbing in. "I'm scared." She cried as she moved closer to him.

"I know." He whispered as he looked at her. She snuggled up against him but the lifejacket made it uncomfortable. "Do you trust me?" He asked and smiled slightly when she nodded. "Do you think you could take the lifejacket off? I promise you'll still be safe." He waited and smiled even more when she unclasped the buckle. He tossed it onto the floor as she scooted closer to him, eventually settling in with her head resting on his chest and her arms wrapped around his muscular body. He held her tight as the boat continued to rock hard from side to side. "Favorite movie?"

"Pretty Woman." She whispered as a smile spread across her face. The question put her at ease and brought her back to the day on the beach when they first started asking each other different questions in order to get to know the other better. Ever since then it had become their thing, it had functioned as an icebreaker, a truce, and now a distracter. "Favorite holiday?"

He smiled down at her in his arms. He would ask her questions all night if he had to in order to keep her mind off of what was happening with the boat and the storm. Seeing her as vulnerable as she had been ever since they had gotten on the boat made him fall even more in love with her. Ever since he had met her, she had been strong and independent but today was different. She had to depend on him to keep her safe, she had to trust him. She had showed him a different side of herself, a softer side, a side he found to be incredibly human and surprisingly irresistible. "Julian?" Her voice brought him back. "Sorry, Fourth of July." He grinned. "Favorite class in high school?"

She suddenly sat up. "Nothing's going to happen tonight." She motioned toward the top drawer that was full of open condom wrappers. "I may be scared and vulnerable and in your bed holding onto you for dear life but I'm not—"

"I know." He said as he sat up and rubbed his hand down her arm. "Holding you in my arms and knowing you're not going anywhere is more than enough for me." He pulled her into a hug and felt her warm tears fall onto the back of his neck. "I will never pressure you into having sex, Brooke." He said as he looked into her eyes. "I know how important it is that you save yourself for marriage and I would never make you sacrifice that."

"Thank you." She smiled through the tears.

They settled back into bed, her cradled in his arms, and picked right back up with their questions. The boat continued to rock back and forth and at times he would feel her whole body tense up. When that happened, he pulled her closer and rubbed circles on her back. "Favorite season?" When he didn't hear her respond he looked down to see her sleeping peacefully against his chest. He smiled at the sight before gently kissing the top of his head. Being with her was easy; he didn't have to pretend to be somebody he wasn't. He didn't have to put on an act. He didn't have to impress her with lavish things. She could care less about that kind of stuff; all she cared about was him and the man he was on the inside. Maybe, he thought as he started to doze off with her in his arms, this wasn't such a bad first date after all.

-x-x-x-

Review please!


	11. Tomato Soup

Chapter Eleven: Tomato Soup

She was confused when she woke up. It took a few seconds for her to register where she was but as she looked around the darkened cabin, the previous night flooded back. She was still wrapped up in his arms and as she looked at his peaceful sleeping form she couldn't help but smile. Waking up in his arms was something she could see herself doing for the rest of her life. She felt so safe and protected, she felt loved. The boat, she noticed, wasn't rocking as badly as it was before. She figured the storm had passed which made her breathe a sigh of relief. The previous night had been a disaster. She had been so weak and vulnerable; two traits she despised. But, on the upside, he had taken such good care of her and had proved to her that he would be there as long as she let him. She nudged him gently and watched as his eyes fluttered open. It took him a few seconds to recognize where he was but when he looked down and saw her in his arms, he smiled. "Hey, beautiful," He said softly. "How'd you sleep?"

"Surprisingly well," She replied. "What about you?"

"Great." He squeezed her against his body. Feeling her skin against his made his heart beat a little faster. "How do you feel about having breakfast up on the bow?"

She eyed him. "Is it safe to do that?"

He leaned over and pulled the curtain towards him revealing a bright blue morning sky. "I'd say so." He grinned.

She placed her hand on his chest and began drawing lazy circles. "Could we stay like this a little bit longer?"

He nodded and leaned down to kiss her, his grin growing as the kiss intensified. They remained in bed together for a few minutes longer before they reluctantly got out and headed up to the bow. Brooke stumbled at bit at first, struggling to find her sea legs but with Julian's help she made it up in one piece. When they reached the top, she squeezed his hand and he soothingly rubbed her back as she looked around her and saw that they were still in the middle of the ocean. "You okay?" He asked.

She nodded. "I'm getting used to it."

He knew she was lying as he pulled out her chair and waited for her to sit before he did. Pierre appeared almost instantly with a plate of fresh fruit and two forks which they quickly devoured. "So," She grinned. "What are we going to do today?"

He shrugged. "Whatever you want to do."

She looked around and saw that there was no land in sight. "When exactly are we going to be able to get off the boat?"

"We're about half an hour away from the port." He replied. He saw the relief in her eyes which he found incredibly cute for some reason. "We have to pick Olivia up by six; my parents have a dinner party."

She nodded but then suddenly looked up at him. "What are we going to tell her?" When she saw the confused look on his face she elaborated. "How are we supposed to explain us to her?"

"What's there to explain? We're taking it slow, she won't even notice, Brooke." He assured her as he placed his hand on her knee.

"She's a lot more observant than you think." Brooke replied. "She was also dead set on getting us together."

Julian's eyes widened. "Seriously?"

Brooke chuckled. "Yeah, the day Peyton and Haley came to visit and she called me mommy. I set the record straight with her and told her that I was just her nanny and she seemed to understand."

"But?"

"But then she asked if I would be her mom if you and I got married."

Julian couldn't help but laugh. "What did you say to her?"

"I just nodded. What was I supposed to do, lie?"

He couldn't stop laughing.

"I don't get why you think this is so damn funny!" She exclaimed. "She's a smart girl, Julian and she's going to put things together and what happens if something happens between you and me? She's going to latch onto the idea of me being her mom the moment she finds out we're together and then if for some reason we don't work out she is going to be heartbroken. I can't do that to her. I can't—"

"Nothing is going to happen between us, Brooke." He assured her as he squeezed her hand.

She shook her head. "You can't promise that."

"Yes I can." He challenged. "I'm not going anywhere and I'll be damned if I lose you. I'm done acting stupid, I'm done hiding behind my work, I'm done being an absent father. I want us to work more than I've ever wanted anything in my life."

"Okay." She said simply.

His face lit up. "Don't run from this, Brooke."

"I won't." She assured him.

Half an hour later the boat was docked and Julian was collecting the last of their things. He looked out of the corner of his eye to see her staring out the small porthole window. She was still in his pajamas and he yearned to see her in them every morning for the rest of his life. "You ready?" He asked.

She turned and nodded. "Yeah." She said softly.

"Jump on." He said as he crouched down.

She giggled. "You can't be serious."

"I don't joke about piggybacks."

The sound of her laugh was like music to his ears. She couldn't stop laughing and when he glanced over his shoulder and caught sight of her dimples as she tried, but failed, to push her bangs out of her eyes he only smiled wider. He ran down the dock toward the car while she shrieked and continued to laugh. Today, he thought, was going to be a good day.

-x-x-

An hour and a half later, they had both showered, changed and were ready to go. She still had no idea what they were going to do. When she had asked him what to wear all he had said was something comfortable. She had slipped into a pair of jeans, put on a simple white shirt and pulled her hair back into a ponytail. "You look great." He told her when he saw her for the first time.

"Thanks." She grinned as her hand found his. "So, are you going to tell me what we're doing?"

As he reached for the car keys he nodded. "I have something to show you."

Ten minutes later the car came to a stop and Brooke was even more confused. "You really need to stop bringing me to abandoned places." She said as she looked around their surroundings. "It's starting to get predictable."

He laughed before opening his car door. "C'mon," He said.

"Where are we going?" She asked again as he pulled her down the street. She suddenly felt him place his hands over her eyes. "Julian!" She squealed. "What are you doing?"

"It's a surprise." He insisted. "Just trust me."

She did. He had proven himself the night before and she had fallen even harder for him during the hours they spent on the boat. She felt safe in his arms; like that was where she belonged. But she still couldn't shake the feeling that they were moving way too fast. She had only met Julian a month and a half earlier yet she had fallen for him and could see herself spending the rest of her life with him. It was comforting yet scary.

"Okay," She heard him whisper and felt him remove his hand from her eyes. "You can look now." She kept her eyes shut, scared to see what might be in front of her when she finally did. "Brooke," He laughed. "C'mon."

He watched as her eyes fluttered open and a look of pure confusion appeared on her face. "Where are we?" She asked, her voice was small and unsure.

He reached for her hand. "We," He smiled. "Are in your restaurant."

She stared at him in bewilderment. "What?"

"This," He said as he gestured around the abandoned building. "Is all yours."

"How?" She could barely get the word out.

"It used to be an Italian restaurant but the owner ran into a bit of money trouble, so when the bank foreclosed on it I bought it as a future business investment awhile back waiting for the right thing to come along." He grinned.

She shook her head as she looked around them. "I couldn't—I can't accept this Julian. It's too much."

"You're a great cook, Brooke. You even said yourself that you wanted to one day have your own restaurant. Today is one day, Brooke."

Yeah, she thought, I wanted it but that was back when I had Owen. She was supposed to cook and he was supposed to bartend. She wasn't supposed to do this alone. It was _their_ dream, not just hers. "It was just a dream I had." She said softly.

He knew exactly what she was thinking about. "Owen would want this." He said softly after a few moments of silence between them.

She stared at him. "How do you know?" She asked, her tone a bit harsher than she had intended. "How could you know what he would want? You didn't know him."

"I know that he would want you to be happy and this will make you happy, Brooke." He said as he moved toward her. "I know it's a lot to take in right now but just know that I believe in you and what this could be." He said as he gestured around them.

She looked around slowly. There was definite potential. Sure, the wallpaper needed to be taken care of and the tables, chairs and booths needed a modern update. The windows needed a good cleaning and the light fixtures needed a dusting badly. This could be her dream come true, this could be her big break, and she could finally be who she always wanted to be. But without Owen was it really worth it? Did she know how to do this on her own? He was the one who had drawn countless sketches and picked out tables, chairs, light fixtures…everything. "What if I fail?" Her voice was small and came out in a whisper but he heard her loud and clear.

"You won't." He insisted. "There's no possible way you could fail. You were born to do this."

She smiled at his kind words. Her reaction was not what he was expecting, she knew, and she felt terrible but he had to know this was hard. He knew that this was her dream with Owen. But he's gone, she told herself, and Julian is here. "There's a lot of work to be done." She said as she looked around.

He smiled. "I know."

"Are you willing to help?"

He nodded as he wrapped his arms around her waist. "Are you willing to take a chance on this?"

She nodded. "It's scary."

"I know."

Starting a restaurant without Owen when it was what they had always dreamed to do together was going to be difficult. There was no denying that, but she had Julian and he was going to be with her every step of the way. "So, you want to cook something?"

She looked back at the kitchen. "Is it safe to do that?"

He nodded. "The ovens and stoves still work."

After a quick trip to the grocery store down the street, they were back in the kitchen cooking. Brooke was doing most of the work while Julian leaned against the counter and watched her. "You know," She laughed. "You could help me."

"Remember the last time I tried to cook something? Those cookies tasted terrible."

"Yes," She said as she reached for a tomato. "But you didn't have me there to help you. I can teach you how to cook."

"If you do that though you may have some competition," He grinned as he began to juggle three tomatoes. "And I wouldn't want your ego to suffer if the critics liked my restaurant more."

"I think your ego would be the one that would suffer," She replied as she reached in to grab one of the tomatoes he was juggling. "Unless of course people enjoy eating salty chocolate chip cookies."

He put down the two tomatoes before he walked over to her and snaked his arms around her waist. She giggled as she turned around and draped her arms around his neck. He leaned down to kiss her and smiled as she intensified the kiss. "So," He said after reluctantly pulling away. "When is the tomato soup going to be ready?"

"In a little bit." She replied quickly before pushing up on her tiptoes to kiss him.

The smell of something burning tore them away from each other. "Damnit!" She exclaimed as she ran over to the stove. He watched as she pulled the large pot off the burner with ease and began to stir. "Ow!" She suddenly jumped back. He had seen the boiling liquid bubble up and land on her hand and within moments he was by her side. "I'm okay," She insisted. "It's just a little burn."

He held her hand under the stream of cold water that was pouring out of the faucet. "That's not a little burn, Brooke." He said as he looked down. The entire top of her hand was red and he knew it was only a matter of time before it began to blister.

"Things like this happen all the time." She told him. "It's part of the job."

He removed her hand from the water and proceeded to wrap it in paper towels.

"I'm sorry I ruined the soup." She said as she watched him.

He laughed. "It wasn't your entire fault. I'm half to blame."

She shrugged. "What are we supposed to do now? I'm starving."

"Are you okay?" He asked as he motioned toward her wrapped hand. She nodded. "Wait here for a couple minutes, then."

He was out the door before she could even ask where he was going. She sat in the kitchen and looked around once more. She closed her eyes and started to imagine what everything would look like six months from now; not only with the restaurant but also with Julian. Where would they be then? Dating? Engaged? Broken up? She thought about Olivia and how no matter what happened with Julian, her relationship with Olivia would not change.

"What are you doing, beautiful?" His voice interrupting her thoughts.

"Just thinking about the future." She said simply. "What did you get?"

"Lunch." He smiled as he walked into the kitchen. "I hope you like Chinese."

She nodded before jumping up onto the counter, folding her legs Indian style and motioning for him to join. He sat across from her, the spread of Chinese food between them.

"I don't understand how you eat with these." She said as she struggled to pick up a peapod with her chopsticks.

He had been laughing at her ever since she had taken the chopsticks out of the paper wrapper. "It's easy," He said as he effortlessly picked up a bite of stir-fry.

"Not it's not!" She argued.

He picked up the peapod she had been trying to get before leaning over and feeding it to her. She smiled and he alternated between taking bites himself and feeding her until there wasn't much food left. He got down and went out front only to return with a bottle of wine and two glasses.

"Where did you get that?" She asked as she tossed the remnants of their meal into the trash.

"Out front." He answered.

She rolled her eyes in response before heading out of the kitchen.

"Where are you going?" He asked as he followed her.

"I can't believe you had this all planned." She said as she shook her head in disbelief. "Weren't you listening when I told you that I'm not that kind of girl who you can wine and dine and—"

"I planned this because I care about you, Brooke." He said as he placed the bottle and glasses down. "I thought that after we ate we could enjoy a glass of wine and talk before we have to go and get Olivia."

"Really?" She asked skeptically.

He nodded. "Really."

"I'm sorry." She said softly as she sunk down in a chair at the bar.

He poured some wine into her glass. "You really need to start trusting me."

"I know," She sighed. "I do but then I have moments where I start to freak out because things are going way too well and—"

"Brooke." He said sternly. "Just stop."

"It's not that easy."

"It is." He argued.

She sighed and figured she should just drop it before they ended up fighting and saying things they didn't mean. "I have a question."

He eyed her and watched as she swirled her wine. "About?"

"Kate."

He inhaled deeply before sitting next to her at the bar. "Brooke—"

"I have questions, Julian and I feel justified in having them because she's Olivia's mom and your first love and I know basically nothing about her while you know practically everything about Owen."

He smiled and placed his hand on her knee. "You're right."

"I am?" She was clearly surprised.

He nodded. "What do you want to know?"

"What if she comes back? What if one day she shows up on your doorstep asking for a second chance? Not only with Olivia but with you too; she was your first love and I know she hurt you but they say you never get over your first love and…" She trailed off fearing she had said too much. "I'm sorry." She said as she shook her head. "I shouldn't have—"

"She's not coming back." He said. "She left and I haven't heard from her in five years. She turned her back on Olivia when she was a week old. I can forgive her for what she did to me but I can't forgive her for what she did to Olivia. She was her mother and she left without even saying goodbye. You have nothing to worry about because even if by some chance she did show up on my doorstep one day, I want nothing to do with her. She may be a part of my past but you are my future, Brooke."

She nodded, satisfied with his answer, before reaching for his hand and squeezing it. "That's enough for today," She said softly. "The rest can wait for some other day."

x-x-x

Olivia had been so excited to tell Brooke and Julian about her weekend with Paul and Diane that she didn't notice the loving looks they gave each other during dinner. Or, the way they smiled when their skin came into contact while they helped Olivia take a bath. They had all crammed into Olivia's bed to read a bedtime story and within minutes the little girl had fallen asleep in between Brooke and Julian. He hadn't noticed since he was reading the book, but when he had finished he saw that Brooke had also fallen asleep. He smiled at the sight and thought about how much his life had changed in the past month and a half. He hadn't seen himself being a husband before he had met Brooke but lately that was all he could think about. He could see his life five years from now; stopping by the restaurant during his lunch break to have a quick meal with his wife, coming home in the evening to find her helping Olivia with homework while cooking dinner and tending to a fussy baby, cuddling at night with her in his arms thinking about how lucky it was that Brooke had found Olivia in the park that one day because if she hadn't his life wouldn't be what it was and he couldn't imagine it any other way. Nothing, he thought, as he reached for Brooke's hand, was going to get in the way of that.

-x-x-x-

Review please!


	12. Honey Glazed Ham

Chapter Twelve: Honey Glazed Ham 

Olivia still hadn't picked up on Brooke and Julian's relationship. While Julian didn't see an issue with it, Brooke grew more frustrated as each day passed. She felt bad hiding something as big as their relationship from Olivia but at the same time, once Olivia knew there was no going back. It had been a week and a half since Brooke and Julian had spent the night together on the boat and the feelings between them had only intensified.

"Are you excited to come to the restaurant after school today?" Brooke asked Olivia as she drove her to school.

Olivia nodded from the backseat. "Does it look any different than when I saw it Saturday?"

"That was two days ago." Brooke laughed. "How much work do you think your dad and I can get done in that amount of time?"

She shrugged. "A lot?"

"If your daddy wasn't so talkative we could get a lot more done," She replied. He also constantly distracted her by kissing her which wasn't so bad but she wanted to open the restaurant by March and that was only five months away. Today, though, she would be able to get a lot done since Julian was back at the office.

"Do you think daddy's been acting different?" Olivia's voice was sweet and naïve.

Brooke peered at the little girl through the rearview mirror. "What do you mean bumblebee?" She asked cautiously.

Olivia smiled at her nickname before shrugging. "I don't know. He's happy all the time now and he actually likes spending time with me. He comes home early for dinner and even helps you! He never did that before. It's weird to see him all smiley all the time."

She wanted to tell Olivia, tell her that she was dating her dad and then she could stop trying to hide their relationship but she couldn't do it. If anyone was going to tell Olivia what was going on it was going to be Julian. He was her father. "Do you like that he's so happy all the time?"

Olivia nodded fiercely. "I love it." She answered truthfully. "Thank you."

"For what?" Brooke eyed her.

"Changing him." Olivia said simply as Brooke pulled into the school parking lot. She unclasped her seatbelt and opened the door before Brooke had even put the car in park.

"Slow down," Brooke insisted as she scrambled to get out. "Why are you in such a rush?"

Olivia reached for Brooke's hand and pulled her toward the school building. "I want you to meet someone." She said and they suddenly stopped in front of a boy who looked to be Olivia's age. "Brooke, this is Tyler. My boyfriend."

Brooke couldn't hide her amusement. It took everything she had inside of her not to start laughing at the situation before her but she managed to compose herself as she knelt down to Tyler's height. "Hi Tyler," She said as she held out her hand. "I'm Brooke, Olivia's nanny."

Olivia scoffed before leaning in to whisper to Tyler. Brooke knew she had meant for it to be a secret but she heard Olivia loud and clear. "She says that all the time but she's really more like a mom than a nanny." The words made Brooke melt and if it weren't for Miss Ashley telling all the kids it was time to start school, Brooke would have blurted out that she was dating Julian. She watched Tyler reach for Olivia's hand and smiled to herself as they walked toward Miss Ashley. Julian, she thought, was in for quite the surprise.

x-x-x

She had been in the restaurant for a little over three hours and her thoughts had started to consume her. Not having Julian there allowed her to get a lot of work done but it also left her alone with her thoughts and they were running rampant. This was too much. She couldn't do this on her own. It was too much work. She wasn't supposed to do this without Owen. She shook her head and pulled the last piece of wallpaper from the wall. Steaming the wallpaper off was much harder than Brooke had originally thought. It had taken two full days to completely strip the walls of the ugly, outdated pattern and prep them for the paint. Julian had been helpful in the process of removing all the chairs and tables, and as Brooke looked around the restaurant she noticed how empty it was. It wouldn't be like this for long, she thought, as she started to picture what it would look like in five months. She had yet to decide on a name but the process had kept her lying awake in bed for the past few nights. As she was popping the top off of the paint can she heard the door open. "You're supposed to be at work." She said without looking up.

"I hate being away from you though," He whined as he made his way toward her.

"I do too but both of us have work that needs to get done and we aren't very productive when we are together." She said as she looked up at him, smiling at how handsome he looked in his suit. "How'd the meeting go?"

"Good," He nodded. "Production starts next week. It's going to be a huge hit at the box office next summer." He bent down to give her a kiss. "That's the color you're going with?" He asked as he peered down at the paint can.

"It's too bland, isn't it?" She sighed as she stared down into the bucket. "I should have gone with something fun like aqua or tangerine. Instead, I chose sand."

"I like it." He shrugged.

She looked up at him. "You do?"

"It's neutral so you can do whatever with the décor." He reasoned. "You could do aqua or tangerine accents and then you get the best of both worlds."

She smiled up at him. "You're pretty smart."

"You're pretty." He replied as he leaned in to kiss her. "Do you need any help?"

"You have on a thousand dollar suit and you want to help paint?" She asked in disbelief.

"Twenty-two hundred." He corrected.

"For a _suit?" _Brooke cried. "You are crazy."

"Well then do you want to get lunch?"

She poured some of the paint into a tray. "I can't, I have so much to do if I want this place to open on time."

"Is an hour for lunch really going to set you back that much?"

"It's an hour here and an hour there that start to add up, Julian." She explained. "But I need to talk to you about something."

"Olivia knows?" He asked immediately.

She shook her head. "No but I think you should tell her. She notices that things are different and I don't want to continue hiding this from her."

"But you said—"

"I know but you told me last week that you weren't going anywhere and I'm telling you today that neither am I. I'm in this forever." Her voice was strong and sure.

He closed the gap in between them and slid his arms around her waist. "We'll tell her tonight at dinner." He said softly before kissing her.

She nodded as she pressed her forehead against his. The amount of love she felt for him was unreal. Never before had she fallen so hard and so fast for somebody. It had taken her a few dates and many weeks to fall in love with Lucas and Owen but Julian was so different. She was usually cautious when it came to love but it was as if she had thrown caution to the wind when it came to Julian. "I need to tell you something else and I hope you won't be mad at me."

He eyed her curiously. "What is it?"

"I don't want this to be a restaurant." She said quietly.

"Okay," He said slowly. "What do you want it to be?"

"I don't know yet," She answered honestly. "But I do know that with a restaurant comes a lot of work and time away from home and I don't want that. I want to be home cooking dinner for you and Olivia not twenty other families. This will be something, Julian, I promise, I'm just not sure yet what that will be."

"What are you going to do with all the kitchen space?" He asked.

"It might come in handy." She said with a small smile. "You should probably get back to work, though."

"You sure you'll be okay?" He asked.

She nodded. "I'll actually get some work done."

He kissed her one final time before heading for the door. "Tonight." He called over his shoulder.

She couldn't help but smile. Tonight Olivia would know and she and Julian would no longer have to hide their relationship. There was no way to know for sure how Olivia would take the news but Brooke had a feeling she would be elated.

x-x-x

Three o'clock came a lot faster than Brooke had expected. She was almost late in picking Olivia up from school but made it just in the nick of time.

"You almost forgot me." Olivia said as Brooke strapped her into her car seat.

"I did not." Brooke argued. "I knew I had to pick you up I just lost track of time. There's a difference."

"Tyler traded me his cookies for my apple today at lunch." Olivia smiled.

Brooke shook her head at how fast Olivia could change topics. "You wanted cookies instead of a healthy apple?"

Olivia giggled. "Who wouldn't?"

"Are you going to tell daddy about your new boyfriend?"

Olivia shook her head. "Avery told me that I shouldn't tell anyone for at least a week just in case it doesn't work out. She's had lots of boyfriends so she knows what she's talking about."

Brooke couldn't help but laugh at what had just come out of the five-year-old's mouth. "But you told me."

"You're different."

"How?" Brooke asked as she looked at her through the rearview mirror.

Olivia shrugged. "You just are."

"How long have you two been dating?"

"Since Friday at recess, he asked me to be his girlfriend under the slide." Olivia blushed.

"How romantic," Brooke swooned.

"I know." Olivia smiled contently.

"Have you kissed him yet?"

"No!" Olivia cried. "Avery says that you don't kiss until you're married!"

Ten minutes later Brooke was leading Olivia into the restaurant. The little girl looked around and nodded in approval of the paint color. Brooke set Olivia up at one of the tables to color while she finished painting. While Brooke painted, Olivia talked. She had so much to tell her about Tyler and about school in general. Brooke couldn't wait to get home, cook dinner and explain to Olivia that she and her father were dating which was why she started to clean up sooner than she had planned.

"Where are we going?" Olivia asked when she saw Brooke closing the paint can.

"Home." Brooke answered.

"But we've only been here for an hour."

Brooke shrugged. "I've been here all day and I got most of the paining done so I think we're good."

The whole time she cooked, she smiled. Olivia had scampered up to change her clothes the second they walked through the front door and hadn't returned since. They had stopped at the grocery store on the way home to pick up the ingredients Brooke needed to make dinner. She was basting the ham when she heard him walk through the front door causing her smile to grow even bigger.

"That smells delicious," He said as he bent down on the other side of the opened oven. "Almost ready?"

"In a little bit." She replied before closing the oven and leaning in to kiss him. "How was the rest of your day?"

"Okay," He shrugged. "I missed you."

She smiled. "I missed you too but I got a lot of work done today. The painting is done." She said proudly.

He nodded in approval. "Good, what's next on the agenda?"

"I'm going to go to the Home Depot tomorrow and look at tile." She said as she poured cream into the mashed potatoes. "That's going to be a tough project."

"You're going to hire someone to do it, right?" He asked as he stuck his finger in the bowl.

She swatted him away. "You're just as bad as Olivia!" She exclaimed. "Wait until dinner."

"I can't though," He complained. "I'm starving."

"It'll only be a little bit longer." She promised. "Are you excited to tell her?"

He smiled when he saw how much her eyes lit up when she asked the question. "I am," He nodded. "Are you?"

She nodded. "We can finally stop pretending around her."

Thirty minutes later, dinner was ready and on the table. Julian called up to Olivia who came running down the staircase at the sound of her father's voice. "Daddy!" She cried when she saw him. Julian knelt down on one knee and opened up his arms. Olivia ran toward him and giggled when he squeezed her tight. "I missed you!" She said.

"I missed you too, Olivia Rae." He said as he stood up with his daughter in his arms. "Did you have a good day at school?"

Olivia nodded after quickly glancing at Brooke and smiling. When Julian turned Olivia looked at Brooke and held her finger up to her lips. Brooke nodded as she understood what she meant.

x-x

"So," Julian said as he placed his glass of milk down on the table and reached for Brooke's hand. "There's something you should know." He said as he looked at Olivia.

Olivia put down her fork and finished eating her honey glazed ham. She looked at Julian with wide, waiting eyes.

Julian glanced at Brooke for reassurance and she smiled at him before looking at Olivia. He cleared his throat and Brooke found it adorable that he was so nervous. "I uh, you know how much I love you, right?"

Olivia nodded.

"And I know I haven't been a very good dad to you but—"

"You have been ever since Brooke started living here." Olivia interrupted.

Julian smiled at his daughter before looking at Brooke and squeezing her hand. "That's true." He agreed. "And I know you love her a lot but how would you feel if I told you that I do too?"

Olivia smirked. "You love Brooke?"

Julian nodded. "I do."

"I knew it." She said as she picked her fork back up.

Julian and Brooke looked at each other before turning their attention to the little girl who was eating her ham as if nothing had happened. "How?" Brooke finally asked.

Olivia shrugged. "The other night when you thought I was in bed I was actually sitting on the stairs. I saw you on the couch together cuddling and kissing. It was gross but I wasn't that grossed out because I thought it was cute at the same time."

Julian was baffled. "Why didn't you ask us about what you saw?"

"I figured you would tell me eventually if you were really dating." She reasoned. "Besides, you're not supposed to tell anyone your dating for a week anyway."

Julian furrowed his brow and Brooke smiled at his confusion. "You're really okay with this, sweetheart?" He asked.

Olivia nodded. "If she makes you as happy as she's made me then I'm happy for you. You deserve to be happy, daddy." She giggled. "Just please don't hurt her like you hurt all the other nannies. I don't want to lose her."

Brooke placed her hand on top of Olivia's. "This," She said as she motioned between herself and Julian. "Changes nothing between us, I will never leave you, bumblebee. I love you too much to walk away; you're stuck with me forever."

Olivia giggled. "Good."

The three of them continued to eat their dinner, laughing and talking the whole time. Julian found himself zoning out quite a few times wondering how he had gotten so lucky. His daughter was happy. His girlfriend was happy. He was happy. His life couldn't be better and he knew he didn't deserve it. He watched Olivia and Brooke interact and could easily see them ten years from now as mother and daughter. He knew that Olivia craved a mom and he could only imagine how hard it must be for her to see all the other kids in her class with their moms.

"Dad?" Olivia's voice brought him back. "Is Brooke my mom now?"

Brooke, who had taken a sip of water, started to choke. Julian pounded on her back as she coughed and Olivia watched in horror. Brooke had turned a light blue color as she struggled to breathe but the color disappeared as quickly as it came. She inhaled deeply when all the water had finally been coughed up. "Sorry," Brooke said, embarrassed, as she looked from Julian to Olivia.

"Are you okay?" Julian asked, unsure as he rubbed small circles on her back.

She nodded and took a small sip of water. "I was just taken aback by her question, that's all."

Olivia turned to Julian. "Well, does it?' She asked.

"No, sweetie." He said gently. "The only way she'd be your mom is if we got married and she filed adoption papers."

Olivia nodded and Brooke couldn't help but notice the sad look on her face. She was heartbroken as she took her plate from the table and placed it in the sink. Brooke and Julian listened as Olivia climbed the staircase and shut her door.

"Well," Julian said as he wrapped his arm around Brooke's shoulder. "That went well."

-x-x-

Review please!


	13. Cotton Candy

**Sorry it's so short! But an update is an update, right? Enjoy.**

Chapter Thirteen: Cotton Candy

"Go," Brooke said as she nodded in the direction Olivia had taken off in. "You need to talk to her."

"About what?"

"About us, you need to explain that it's not as easy as she thinks it is for me to become her mom. She's confused right now and you need to help her."

Julian looked terrified. "What am I supposed to say?"

Brooke shrugged. "Some things you can't rehearse. Just be honest and when you're with her the right words will come."

"What if I say the wrong thing?"

She knew he was stalling. "You won't." She promised as she got up from the table, taking their plates with her. She watched as he reluctantly pushed himself away from the table and stood. With heavy feet, he began his way toward the staircase and it didn't take long for him to reach Olivia's room. Brooke heard him knock before asking if he could come in and she smiled to herself as she began to wash the dishes.

-x-x-x-

Olivia sat on her bed, her knees pulled up to her chest and her arms wrapped around them. She didn't acknowledge Julian when he walked in and sat down at the end of her bed. He sighed deeply knowing that the conversation he was about to have with his daughter could go really well or really bad.

"I know you're upset and confused, Liv, so I'm here to answer any questions you may have." Julian started as he pulled a stuffed duck onto his lap. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Olivia nodded.

"I don't know how to talk about this with you if you won't talk to me." He said.

"I want a mom." She said in a voice so soft Julian had barely heard her. But he had.

He scooted closer to her. "I know you do."

"It's not fair, daddy!" She cried. "Everybody else has a mom but I don't because she ran away right after I was born. But then Brooke found us and I thought that I would finally have a mom but now you're telling me that she can't be."

"I never said that she can't be your mom," Julian said. "I said that she couldn't be your mom right now. It's a lot more complicated than you think for her to become your mom."

"How?"

Julian knew Olivia was too young to understand but Brooke had said to be honest. "Your real mom still has paternal rights."

Olivia furrowed her brow. "What does that mean?"

"It means that you can't have two mommies, the court won't allow Brooke to adopt you if your real mom still has the right to make decisions for and about you."

"Well can't she just give up the rights to me? I mean she hasn't made any decisions for me my whole life, she doesn't even love me—"

"That's not true." Julian insisted.

Olivia rolled her eyes at her father. "If she loved me she would have thought about how it would feel for me to grow up without a mommy before she left."

Julian shook his head. "You know, sometimes I forget that you're only five years old. You are so mature."

She smiled proudly before crawling over and settling in his lap. At first, he was surprised and felt uncomfortable but that feeling went away in seconds and was replaced by a feeling of love and familiarity. It reminded him how far he had come with Olivia in the past two months. "Even though Brooke can't legally be my mom until Kate signs over her paternal rights, is it okay for me to think of her as my mom?"

Julian was taken aback that Olivia referred to Kate as Kate. "I don't know—"

"Are you going to marry Brooke one day?"

Julian laughed nervously. "What's with all the questions?"

"You said you wanted to talk." Olivia shrugged.

"Your mom was the person I wanted to marry and then she left and I vowed to myself that I would never allow myself to get close enough to someone because I didn't want to be hurt again the way she hurt me. But then Brooke appeared and I can't see my life without her."

Olivia smiled up at her dad. "Good. Neither can I."

"So," Julian said as he interlocked his large hand with her small one. "Do you understand now?"

Olivia nodded. "We need to find Kate and have her sign the papers so Brooke can be my mom!"

Julian sighed. "It's not that easy, sweet pea."

Olivia didn't understand. "But you just said…"

He nodded. "I know but first I have no idea where to find her and second I don't think she'd be willing to sign over paternal rights so that another woman could raise her daughter."

"But I'm not her daughter!" Olivia exclaimed. "I'm _your_ daughter! She walked out on me when I was a week old and that's not what moms do."

When Olivia started crying, Julian had to fight back the tears that had formed in his eyes. It killed him to see her suffering so much and he knew there wasn't anything he could do to make her feel better. They had never discussed Kate in detail like this; he never knew just how much Olivia was struggling with growing up without a mother. He hated himself for not realizing it sooner. He did the only thing he could think of which was hold her in his arms and rock her back and forth while she cried. Eventually she stopped and Julian looked down to see her sound asleep. He carefully moved her off his lap and pulled down the covers as he gently laid her down. He kissed her forehead before standing up and walking out of her room, shutting her door behind him.

He knew he should go down and help Brooke clean up since she had gone through the trouble of making dinner. It wasn't fair for her to have to clean up too, but he couldn't face her, not in his current state. His eyes were red and puffy from crying, his skin was blotchy…he was a mess. He climbed into bed, pulled up the covers and turned on his side as he tried to fall asleep so he could forget about everything for a little while. A sliver of light disappeared just as quickly as it had appeared. Seconds later he felt her slide into bed and wrap her arms around him. He couldn't stop the tears from falling. She tried to soothe him as best she could but sobs wracked his entire body and it didn't seem like they would ever stop.

He had fallen asleep while Brooke lay wide awake with her arms still wrapped around him. He twitched suddenly and she watched as his eyes fluttered open. "Hey there," She said softly, her hand gently rubbing his jaw line.

He looked around, confused. "How long was I asleep for?"

"About two hours?" Brooke shrugged.

He ran his hand down his face. "Sorry."

"It's okay," She smiled. "You're cute when you sleep."

He grinned as he tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "You're always cute."

"So, I'm guessing it didn't go that well?"

"She's curious and doesn't understand that Kate still has paternal rights. I tried explaining it to her and I knew she was struggling but I didn't know it was this bad. All she wants is a mom like everybody else."

Brooke intertwined her fingers with his. "Do you know where you could find Kate? Maybe talk to her and suggest signing over her paternal rights?"

"I'd do that in a heartbeat if I knew where she was." He sighed. "I have no idea where to even start looking."

"Her parents?" She suggested.

"Her dad died in a car accident a few years back and her mom died of pancreatic cancer last May."

Brooke sighed. "Sorry."

"It's okay. We weren't really that close anyway." Julian groaned in frustration. "What are we going to do?"

"We'll make it through this. Tomorrow, you should spend the day with Olivia and let her know how much you love her and how that's never going to change."

"She has school—"

"She's five. She can afford to miss a day." Brooke shrugged.

"What about the attendance policy? It's pretty strict."

"Break the rules, have a little fun, she's only this age once."

He stared at her. "What are you going to do for the day?"

"Get things done at the shop." She replied. "I can entertain myself, you know."

-x-x-x-

He had decided on the San Diego Zoo. It dawned on him as he drove that this was the first thing he and Olivia had done just the two of them. The thought was sobering and when he glanced back at his smiling daughter he knew that this would be the first day of many that they would spend like this. He pulled into a parking spot and jumped out of the car to unbuckle his daughter. They walked hand in hand to the ticket booth, Olivia smiling the whole time.

"I think we should do this everyday!" Olivia exclaimed as she and Julian looked at the giraffes.

"Today is a special day, Liv. Tomorrow its back to reality and that means school for you and work for me."

"I don't really need school, though."

"Yes you do. You need to go to school so you can go to college so you can get a good job."

"I know." She sighed as she turned her attention back to the giraffes.

Julian was glad that Olivia hadn't mentioned Kate all day and it made him think that he was doing a good job distracting her. She had had a smile on her face all day and that made Julian grin from ear to ear.

He could tell she was getting tired as they looked at the elephants; she was beginning to get sluggish and had started to drag her feet so he had offered to carry her on his shoulders. "I can see everything up here!" She cried as she looked around. Julian smiled as he walked into the gift store, telling her to duck as he walked through the threshold.

"What do you think we should get for Brooke?" He asked as they looked around.

Olivia, who was back on the ground, immediately reached for a stuffed zebra and handed it to her father. "They were my favorite." She said.

He nodded in approval and reached in to grab another one for Olivia as well as a bag of cotton candy for after dinner. He paid and picked Olivia back up and she nestled her head on his shoulder as he began to walk back toward the car. "I don't want to leave, daddy," She yawned.

"We'll come back another day." He promised. Just as he had suspected, Olivia was asleep by the time he reached the car. He slipped her into the car seat but paused for a moment after she was buckled in. Today had been a good day, he and Olivia had grown even closer and he couldn't be more thankful for that. He had finally been the father he had always longed to be but didn't know how to be.

They were almost home when Olivia stirred in the backseat. "Daddy," She said, her voice was tired and groggy.

"Hey, sweet pea," He smiled as he glanced back at her. "How was your nap?"

"Not long enough." She yawned.

He laughed. "I know the feeling."

"Are we almost home?" She asked as she glanced out the window.

Julian nodded. "About fifteen minutes away. Do you want to stop by and see Brooke first?"

Olivia nodded enthusiastically. "How come she didn't come with us today?"

Julian exited off the highway. "Today was just a daddy-daughter day." He replied. "We can bring Brooke with us next time."

Olivia nodded. "I had a lot of fun with you, daddy."

He looked back at her through the rearview mirror. The smile on her face warmed his heart. "I did too, baby girl." He agreed. "We should do it more often."

"I'm free tomorrow." Olivia offered.

"Nice try," He grinned. "But you have school."

Olivia was about to reply but all that came out was a scream. She saw the truck barreling toward them before Julian did. She heard him yell but couldn't make out what he said. She heard the crunch of metal and the screech of tires but then everything went black.

-x-x-x-

Review please!


	14. Vanilla Pudding

**I know it's been over a month since I last updated and I am so sorry for that. I promise it won't take that long to update the next chapter, school is over next week and I will be able to update much more often! Also, if there is anything you would like to see now or in the future of this story, let me know! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter! **

Chapter Fourteen: Vanilla Pudding

She felt like she couldn't breathe. Her world had stopped spinning and she was moving in slow motion. As she drove to the hospital, she kicked herself for not picking her phone up sooner. Back at the restaurant, when she had heard it ring, she had pressed ignore when she didn't recognize the number. She ignored it when it rang a second and third time. But when the number called back a fourth time, she picked up. She had told them that they must be mistaken, it couldn't possibly be Julian and Olivia, but it was. The hospital wouldn't tell her over the phone the severity of their injuries, just that they had been involved in a car accident. She was surprised that she hadn't been pulled over, she was driving way over the speed limit, so when she pulled into the emergency room parking lot she was thankful she had gotten there in one piece.

Her clothes were covered in paint and she had managed to get some in her hair as well. Her eyes were red and black stains had dried on her face from crying. She looked a mess but none of that mattered as she ran toward the front desk. The receptionist took in her appearance and motioned a guard over who escorted her down a long hallway after Brooke asked to see Julian and Olivia Baker. She had no idea what she was getting herself into; all she wanted was to see were the two people that her world revolved around.

"Brooke!" He sprang out of his seat when he saw her. Within seconds, his arms were wrapped tightly around her and he had no intention of letting go. He buried his face in her neck and she felt his hot tears trickle down.

"What happened?" She whispered against his neck.

He lifted his head and it was then that Brooke fully took in his appearance. He had a piece of gauze on his forehead and she could see blood starting to leak through. He was in a pair of scrubs which confused her even more. He had a few more cuts and scrapes that were covered with gauze but considering he had been involved in a car accident he looked pretty damn good. "Where's Olivia?" She asked.

"In surgery."

"No," Brooke cried out as she shook her head. "No, she can't be." A fresh batch of tears poured from her eyes. "No!" she cried, over and over again as Julian held her in his arms in the middle of the waiting room. He was crying, too, but not for the same reasons Brooke was. He had seen Olivia after the truck had collided with her side of the car. He had seen the blood. There was so much of it. He was trying to stay positive but given what he had seen there was no possible way that his little girl could be okay.

"What happened?" Brooke asked for the second time as she pulled out of Julian's embrace.

He took her hand and led her over to a cluster of chairs. "A driver lost control of his truck at the intersection of Miles and DiNardo." Julian said, his voice cracking. "She saw it coming right at her, she screamed and the next thing I remember is seeing her covered in blood." He shook his head as tears poured from his eyes. "There was so much blood, Brooke."

Brooke wiped her eyes and inhaled deeply. She was scared as hell but Julian was in worse shape, she had to be the strong one, the one that held everything together when it was all falling apart, she had to step up like everyone had done for her after Owen had died. "She's going to be okay," She said as she squeezed Julian's hand. "She's a strong little girl; she'll make it through this."

He shook his head. "You didn't see the blood. You didn't see her limp body being pulled out of the wrecked car. You weren't there, Brooke!"

"I know." She said softly before she pressed her lips against his forehead. She wasn't sure what else to say. When she had been in the hospital, wrapped from head to toe in sterile gauze, with everyone around telling her it was all going to be okay, what she wanted to do most was punch them all in the face. How could everything be okay? So, knowing Julian probably felt the same way, she simply held his hand. She wanted to be closer to him but she was scared that he was sore from the accident so when he pulled her onto his lap, she was surprised. She rested her head on his shoulder as he leaned his against her chest, his tears cascading down onto her skin.

"I'm scared." His voice was so small yet raspy and hoarse.

She ran her hand through his short hair. "I am too."

She had thought that he had drifted off to sleep because he had grown quiet but she heard the quietest whisper and realized he was talking to her. "What did she do to deserve this?"

"Nothing," Her voice was strong and full of conviction as she lifted his head so he was looking her in the eye. "Olivia did nothing to deserve this, Julian. It was an accident."

"I should have seen it coming, I should have swerved to the left, I should—"

"Stop," She said. "Don't think about what you should have done because it's only going to make you angrier. I've been there, I've done that. I spent countless hours thinking that Owen would still be here if I had yelled louder at him to follow me, if I had insisted on taking care of the windows first but that did nothing for me. I couldn't go back and change what happened and neither can you. I know this isn't what you want to hear right now but everything happens for a reason—"

"No!" Julian exclaimed as he leaped out of his seat which caused Brooke to jump. "Don't you dare tell me this happened for a reason; that my baby girl was _supposed_ to be hit by a truck and fighting for her life while I stand here, unscathed. She's supposed to be running around chasing butterflies and riding her bike." He sank back down in the chair and rested his head in his hands. "I'm sorry." He said softly. "I didn't mean to scare you."

Brooke was about to respond but she didn't when she saw an older man in a white coat making his way toward them in a hurry. "Mr. Baker," He said which brought Julian to his feet instantly.

"How is she?"

"She just got out of surgery," The doctor said, his voice a consistent monotone. "There were a few complications, however once we had her on the operating table."

Brooke felt sick to her stomach and she watched as the color drained from Julian's face. She reached for his hand and squeezed it reassuringly, she wished that she could read the doctor's face but there was no way to tell what he was about to say.

"Her heart stopped twice due to the amount of stress her body was under but we were able to stabilize her and she did just fine for the remainder of the operation." The doctor paused briefly before continuing. "We also had to remove her spleen due to the amount of trauma it sustained in the accident." He paused again and Brooke could tell from the look on his face that what he was about to say next wasn't good. "We had to put her in a medically induced coma due to the shock her body went though this evening—"

"Coma?" Julian repeated as he ran his hand down his face. "My baby…" That was all he got out before he crumpled to the floor, his head in his hands and tears cascading down his face. Brooke smiled weakly at the doctor who took a few steps back in order to give the couple their space. Brooke, much smaller in size, sank down beside him and wrapped his large frame in her arms as she soothingly rocked him back and forth in the middle of the hospital waiting room.

"What are we going to do, Brooke?" He cried, his tears pooling on her shoulder.

She continued to hold him in her arms and inhaled deeply. "We're going to be strong and be there for her no matter what. She's going to be okay, Julian, I promise."

He let out a heart wrenching cry that made fresh tears spring to Brooke's eyes which she fought to keep at bay. "C'mon," She whispered in his ear. "Let's go see our girl."

He looked at her for the first time that evening, really looked at her. She had paint in her hair which was tossed up in a messy ponytail, his sweatpants hung loosely on her small frame and the t-shirt she had on looked like it had seen better days. In that instant he realize that she wasn't going anywhere; she had dropped everything to come to the hospital without a second thought. She had had tears in her eyes when she arrived. She cared about him and Olivia more than he ever thought possible and when he heard her call Olivia 'our girl' he found himself falling in love with her all over again.

"I love you."

His voice was weak and it cracked when he spoke those three little words. It had caught her by surprise, he guessed, because she stared at him for a long moment before replying. He hadn't planned on saying it but he couldn't stop himself when he felt the words bubbling up inside of him.

"Oh," She said as she placed her hands on either side of his face. "I love you, too." She said softly as she pressed her forehead against his. "So much." She whispered.

He lifted his lips to place a tender kiss on her lips and he felt their tears mesh together as they continued to fall from their eyes. "I'll be right next to you the entire time as long as you want me to—"

He cut her off by bringing his finger to her lips. "I want you to be right next to me for the rest of my life, Brooke. I'm never letting you go." He said as he squeezed her hand.

The doctor led them down the hallway and stopped outside a room in the pediatric intensive care unit. "She has quite a few cuts and scrapes and the bruises have begun to reveal their color. Don't let this alarm you; she's on medication that will help alleviate some of her discomfort." He paused briefly. "I'm on for the rest of the night so if you need anything I'm right down the hall."

Brooke watched the doctor leave and when she turned back to face Julian she found him sitting in a chair beside Olivia's bed, his hand wrapped around her tiny one. "I am so sorry, baby girl." He cried softly. "Open your eyes for daddy, Olivia Rae, let me see your pretty eyes again."

Brooke pulled another chair up beside Julian and reached for his free hand before squeezing it. "Don't blame yourself, this wasn't your fault."

He stared at her, bewildered that she knew that was exactly what he was thinking at the moment. "How isn't it? I was driving. I was—"

Brooke cut him off. 'You weren't the one driving the truck that ignored the stop sign. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time but that doesn't mean this was your fault." She assured him.

"We should have stayed at the zoo longer." He said as he shook his head. "I shouldn't have been so eager to leave, if I had parked in the back of the parking lot we wouldn't have been there because it would have taken us longer to get out and that truck would have already gone through the intersection. This whole thing could have been avoided had I just—"

"And I could be happily married to Owen with a baby on the way if I had insisted we take care of the painted-shut windows first instead of leaving them as one of the last things to do."

He stared at her. That wasn't what he was expecting her to say at all. "Brooke—"

"No," She said as she shook her head. "I know that it's hard to believe right now but things happen for a reason. That's what I've learned in the past six months, things happen for a reason and although you may not understand the reason the moment something like this happens, there's a reason you had to go through it. I lost Owen so I could find you and Olivia."

He wrapped his arm tightly around her, pulling her into his embrace. "I love you," He said into her hair. "I don't know how I'd get through this if you weren't here with me. I didn't register a thing the doctor said, I've been in a state of shock ever since the accident and I watched the paramedics pull her limp body from the car." His eyes started to pool with tears again. "I know you said that I can't keep thinking about things I did or didn't do leading up to the accident but why did I escape unscathed and she's lying here in a coma? Why do I have to sit here and watch my baby girl fight for her life and all I have is a scrape on my forehead? Why Brooke?"

She inhaled his scent, closed her eyes and for a momentshe had made herself believe they were sitting on the couch back at the house enjoying each other's company and Olivia was tucked safely up in bed. "I don't know why but like I said this happened for some reason."

An hour had passed without either of them saying anything. It wasn't an awkward silence that surrounded them but rather a comfortable one. She was still wrapped in his embrace; their fingers laced together, Olivia's machines keeping a steady rhythm. "Do you want anything to eat?" She asked realizing it was almost ten at night and neither of them had eaten dinner. "Some coffee?"

He looked down at her and smiled briefly but it vanished as quickly as it had appeared, Brooke figured he felt guilty for smiling. "What is it?" She asked quietly.

"Kate used to make fun of me because I absolutely love the vanilla pudding they have

here. I don't know what makes it so good but it's the absolute best and when Olivia was born I must have eaten fifteen cups of it." He smiled briefly again at the memory.

"Want me to go get you some?" Brooke offered.

"Would you mind?"

She shook her head. "Not at all."

She stood up and smoothed out her clothes before kissing the top of Julian's head and heading toward the cafeteria. When she stepped out into the hallway she leaned against the wall and sank to the floor, her head in her hands, and she let the tears spill from her eyes.

_This is it_, she told herself, _get it all out now because you can't do this in front of Julian. You need to be strong for him._

She let herself cry for a couple more moments before she stood up, wiped her eyes, and pressed on toward the cafeteria in search for some vanilla pudding. When she returned, she watched his eyes light up when he saw that she had three cups of it for him. She sat back in her chair and he wrapped his arm around her just like before as she nestled into position. "How is it?" She asked.

"Just as I remembered." He smiled as he scooped another spoonful into his mouth.

x-x-x

She stood in the doorway, watching as they interacted, and it only took a few seconds to realize they were in love. The way she patted his knee, the way he wrapped his arm around her, squeezing her small frame against his. The way they looked at each other, the way she rested her head on his chest, the look in his eyes when he felt her skin come into contact with his.

Her eyes moved to the small girl lying in the bed and took in her condition; her eyes still closed, a machine helped her breathe, the bandages wrapped around her head, the bruises that had started to surface as a result of the accident.

"What are you doing here?" Julian asked through clenched teeth, his voice was low and angry.

She suddenly realized he was standing right in front of her as she tore her eyes from Olivia lying in the bed. "I—I saw what happened on the news." Her voice was shaky and unsure. "I wanted to make sure you were both alright."

Brooke had gotten up and walked toward the doorway where Julian and the tall blonde woman were standing. She laced her fingers through his and looked at him nervously. "Hi," She said as she extended her free hand. "I'm Brooke."

"Kate." The woman answered curtly and ignored Brooke's waiting hand.

"You don't have a right to be here." Julian said harshly.

"I'm her mom!" Kate cried. "I have every damn right to be here!"

"You are _not_ her mom." Julian corrected. "A mom rocks her baby when she's crying. A mom is there for late night feedings. A mom bathes her baby. A mom knows her daughter's favorite color and her reason for not eating peas is because she doesn't like the fact that they explode in her mouth. A mom is there from the beginning. A mom doesn't leave her week-old daughter for no apparent reason with not so much as a goodbye. As far as I'm concerned you were just a surrogate who carried Olivia around for nine months."

Kate stepped back as if she had been burned. "You—you don't mean that." Kate whispered as she covered her mouth. Brooke saw the tears forming in Kate's eyes and although she knew what Kate had done she couldn't help but feel bad for her.

"Julian," Brooke whispered. "Maybe you could let her sit here for a few minutes. She just wants to make sure Olivia is okay."

Kate nodded. "That's all I want, Julian."

He sighed heavily and ran his hand down his face. "Five minutes." He said. "And don't pretend like you care about her because if you cared you wouldn't have left us five years ago."

Julian's grip on Brooke's hand was much stronger than before. He nervously tapped his foot as he watched Kate watch Olivia's chest rise and fall. As she watched them she couldn't help but feel out of place; Julian and Kate shared Olivia and Brooke suddenly felt very threatened by that. What if the reason for the accident was so that Kate could come back into Julian and Olivia's lives? What if this was their second chance at love and happily ever after? Brooke continued to watch Kate and Julian and she felt sick to her stomach. She jumped when she heard Julian's voice.

"Your time's up." He said curtly. "You can leave now."

Kate looked at Julian and hurried to her feet as she hastily picked up her purse which resulted in her spilling the contents of it all over the floor. She tried to pick it up but he saw it and scooped it up before she had the chance.

"You're married?" He asked in disbelief as he looked at the diamond ring in his hand.

"Julian—"

"And pregnant?" He asked as he held up the positive pregnancy test that was in a clear plastic baggie. "Well, you might want to let your husband know that you're going to run a week after you give birth so that he has time to prepare. You know, because that's what you do."

Tears fell from Kate's eyes as she ripped the bag out of Julian's hand and snatched the ring from his palm. She ran out of the room without a word but Brooke heard her cries in the hallway since the door hadn't shut all the way.

Julian began to pace the room and Brooke didn't know what to say. He hadn't been very nice to Kate but she hadn't been very nice to Julian five years ago when she left without saying anything leaving Julian on his own to raise a baby on his own at nineteen. Brooke got the feeling that things were about to complicated and all she wanted was Olivia to wake up so that Kate could see Olivia wanted nothing to do with her and then she could just go away. Brooke wanted to be the one to get the happily ever after with Julian and Olivia, Kate didn't deserve a second chance after turning her back on them. She had her chance; it was Brooke's turn now.

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	15. Roast Beef

Chapter Fifteen: Roast Beef

His mind was racing after Kate left. He knew he had been harsh but she deserved it, didn't she? She had left without saying anything and he hadn't heard anything from her in over five years. The fact that she came running when she saw the piece run on the evening news didn't sit right with him either. The news was local so that meant Kate had lived nearby yet she never told him and they had never run into each other. He didn't know whether to laugh or cry at that. She had been _this_ close the whole time and he never knew.

Brooke, however, was doing better than him, or so he thought. She had fallen asleep sometime after midnight and had slept through the night while he had been up pacing trying to figure out the exact moment when his life had spun out of control. He had been trying to get a hold of his parents but he knew that he wouldn't have any luck since they were vacationing in London for the next two weeks and hadn't brought a phone with them. He wished he could rewind his life to twelve hours before when he and Olivia were still at the zoo, happy as ever without a care in the world.

Brooke was still sleeping in the chair beside Olivia's bed when he returned with coffee from the cafeteria. He nudged her gently and watched as she stirred from the deep sleep she had been consumed in for most of the night. "How is she?" Her voice was scratchy and still full of sleep.

He leaned in to kiss her forehead before responding. "Same as last night, no change."

Brooke sighed heavily as she took the coffee cup from Julian. "Did you get any sleep?"

He shook his head. "When I close my eyes all I see is that moment before the truck collided with the car. Her fear-stricken face, her scream fills my ears—"

Brooke leaned her head against his chest and tried to comfort him by wrapping her arms around him. "She's going to be okay." She said softly. "She has a whole life ahead of her that she still has to live before she can be taken away from us."

He rested his chin on top of her head and stared down at his daughter who still wasn't breathing on her own. "Why don't you run home and take a shower?" He suggested.

She pulled out of the embrace and looked up at him. "I don't want to leave you alone—"

"I'll be fine." He assured her. "Besides, it'll give me time to think."

She eyed him skeptically.

"You have nothing to worry about, Brooke. I just need a little time to myself right now and I'm sure you're itching to get out of those paint-covered clothes." He said as he looked down at her.

Reluctantly, she let go of him, reached for her purse and placed a soft kiss on Olivia's forehead before walking out of the hospital room. Julian ran his hand down his face and sighed deeply knowing that he had just royally screwed up by pushing her away when he needed her the most.

x-x-x

"Can I talk to you?"

Brooke kept walking toward her car, unaware that somebody was following her.

"Brooke?"

Hearing her name, she stopped and turned around.

"Kate? What are you—"

"I need to talk to you." Kate said as she walked toward Brooke who took a few steps backward when she saw the blonde approaching.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Brooke said as she looked around, she was hoping Julian was going to emerge any second and tell Kate to back off.

"Please," Kate begged. "Just give me an hour of your time, that's all I'm asking for."

An hour was a lot of time to give somebody, especially somebody who had ruined the lives of the two people Brooke cared most about. She had hoped to be showered and back at the hospital in less than an hour but if she gave Kate what she wanted that wouldn't be possible. Brooke eyed Kate and she couldn't help but feel sorry for her. "One hour." Brooke said as she nodded toward her car. "And Julian can't know."

The ride was silent. Brooke didn't know what to say and Kate wasn't sure how to start the conversation she had been so eager to have. Brooke parked the car, got out and waited for Kate to follow. She hadn't brought her to the house; instead she had driven to the beach. The house was sacred to her, it was where she had shared many moments with Julian, the man she loved, and bringing Kate there would tarnish that.

"So," Brooke said softly as she and Kate walked along the water's edge.

"I loved him and I loved Olivia but I wasn't ready to be a mother at nineteen." Kate said as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Loved?" Brooke repeated.

Kate nodded. "How terrible is that? I can't bring myself to speak in the present tense about the father of my child and my own daughter." She shook her head. "Last night when I saw her lying there helpless and in pain the motherly instincts that I thought I had been lacking all these years came rushing in. That's why I left when she was a week old; I had no idea how to be a mother."

"Nobody ever does." Brooke replied. "It would be a lot easier if the hospital gave you a how-to guide when you left the hospital but they don't, you just have to figure it out along the way."

Kate smiled. "I was pretty reckless back then, that's how I ended up pregnant and I was so scared that I would do something to screw Olivia up and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did something wrong in a moment of weakness."

"Julian screwed up but now he's an unbelievable father to Olivia. He didn't know what Olivia's favorite color was or that she's allergic to walnuts until a just a few months ago—"

"What changed him?"

Brooke looked at a sailboat moving along the horizon. "I did." She said softly. "I forced him to take a greater interest in his daughter's life and to put work on the backburner for a little bit."

Kate shook her head. "I'm surprised he listened to you, he's the most stubborn person I know."

Brooke felt protective of Julian when Kate talked about him. Kate didn't know him the way Brooke did, she didn't get to talk about Julian that way after what she had done to him five years ago. "Why did you come to the hospital?" She asked, changing the subject.

Kate stopped walking and dug her hands into her back pockets of her jeans. "I honestly couldn't tell you. Something inside of me propelled me to get in the car and drive to the hospital." She sighed deeply. "I think I just wanted to make sure she was okay and that I made the right decision to leave."

Brooke looked up at her. "Did you?"

It took a few minutes for Kate to respond. "I don't know how much Julian has told you about our relationship but when we were good, we were great but when we were bad we were toxic. Deep down I knew we weren't going to last and I felt bad that the only reason he would stick around was because of Olivia. I'm not trying to portray myself as a saint or anything but the real reason I left when she was a week old was because Julian and I weren't meant to be together. I didn't want our daughter growing up in a household where she didn't feel safe because her parents were constantly screaming at each other. I didn't want her growing up thinking that's what marriage is." She paused as she wiped a tear from her cheek that had fallen. "I watched the two of you together for a couple minutes before I came into the hospital room. He never held me the way he holds you. He never looked at me the way he looks at you. And, he never ever loved me the way he loves you, Brooke. You helped a bitter man become an amazing father and you made him believe in love again. You were meant for Julian and Olivia, not me."

Brooke couldn't stop herself. She knew she had taken Kate by surprise when she wrapped her in a hug because it took a few seconds for Kate to respond and hug her back.

Brooke no longer felt threatened; it was never Kate's intention to try and lure Julian and Olivia back. As much as it had hurt Julian, Kate knew she had made the right choice in leaving him all those years ago. If she hadn't, they would be in a miserable, loveless marriage and Olivia would be suffering the most from it.

"Brooke," Kate said once they had pulled out of their hug. "I want you to know that after I left the hospital I went to the courthouse to waive my paternal rights to Olivia—"

"Ka—Kate," Brooke stuttered as she shook her head. "You—"

"Olivia may be my daughter but you're her mother and I know that you might not be ready to marry Julian right now but there's no denying that you two are destined to spend the rest of your lives together."

Brooke was speechless as she wiped her eyes. "I don't know what to say," She said as she looked at Kate.

"Just promise to take care of them and to love them more than anything in this world."

"I already do." Brooke said softly.

Kate hugged Brooke one more time before they both headed in the direction of the car. They were about halfway back to the hospital when Brooke broke the silence. "Are you ready to be a mom now?" She asked as she looked at Kate's still flat belly.

A smile appeared on Kate's face as she nodded. "I'm in a good place."

"How far along are you?"

"Just six weeks. I haven't even told my husband yet. I went to see the doctor two days ago and she confirmed what the home pregnancy test said. I've been trying to think of creative ways to tell Steve but I can't think of any!" She laughed.

"If it were me I'd just come right out and say it." Brooke offered.

Kate eyed Brooke. "Do you want kids?"

"Yeah," Brooke smiled as she pondered the question. "I want a big, crazy, loud family that makes people shake their heads and wonder why on earth somebody would want that many kids."

"Why do you want that many kids?" Kate asked.

"Because there will be so much love that we won't know what to do with it. It'll be so overwhelming that at times it will seem suffocating but it'll always be there to make you feel comfortable and safe." She replied as she stared out at the open road in front of her. "I just hope my kids never question how much I love them like I did growing up."

"They will." Kate whispered as she turned to look out the window.

Brooke hugged Kate one final time once they were back at the hospital. As Kate climbed into her car Brooke couldn't help but feel sad. Kate wasn't a bad person she had just made a decision that had hurt Julian more than she ever could have imagined. Had it been a different life, she and Kate could have been friends, best friends even, who drink coffee in the kitchen while the kids play in the living room. As Brooke drove back toward the house she shared with Julian she thought about Kate and Julian. If Kate had stayed, they both would have still ended up hurt. Their relationship was toxic, Kate had said, and no matter how great it was on the good days there weren't enough of them to make up for the bad days. So, she thought, was it better that Julian felt the pain he felt when Kate left him a week after Olivia was born? Or, would he hurt more had she stayed to help him raise Olivia and all they did was fight? Brooke pushed the thoughts from her mind because when it came down to it none of it mattered. Kate wasn't a part of Julian's life anymore and everything that happened in the past was responsible for getting them all to the place they were now.

x-x-x

She was happy to see that he was sleeping when she returned the hospital. Granted, he didn't look comfortable curled up in a chair that was too small for him, but at least he was getting some rest.

Brooke carefully sat down on the edge of Olivia's bed and gently patted the little girl's leg. "Bumblebee," She whispered. "It's time for you to wake up. I feel like I haven't seen your pretty eyes or heard your laugh in a very long time and that isn't okay. Your daddy is trying to be strong while you sleep but I can tell that inside he's falling apart." She paused as she looked over at Julian to make sure he was still asleep. "I know that all you've ever wanted is to have a mom. I also know that during these past couple of months you've referred to me as your mom and you don't really understand the adult world and how things work when it comes to technicalities like me actually becoming your mom. I hope that one day I do. Nothing would make me happier or bring more joy into my life than to call you my own someday. I promised you that I would never leave you no matter what. You need to promise that you'll do the same for me. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you, my little bumblebee. It's time to wake up, sweetheart. Wake up for mommy." She surprised herself when the word slipped out of her mouth. She hadn't meant to say it but it had come out so easily and it felt natural.

Julian started to stir and she hoped that he hadn't just heard what she had said to Olivia. "Hey," he said as he stretched. "How was that shower?"

She smiled. "It felt great but I was itching to get back to you two."

He patted his lap and opened his arms. She melted in his embrace as she buried her face in his neck. He squeezed her tight and inhaled the intoxicating aroma of the lemongrass shampoo she had used. "I'm sorry for pushing you away earlier." He whispered in her hair. "I didn't mean to."

"I know." She whispered, her breath was hot against his neck.

He felt something drip down the side of his neck, onto his shoulder and down his back. It took him a few minutes to realize that Brooke was crying. "Hey," He said softly as he pulled back so he was looking at her. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "Nothing."

"Baby," He said as he gently rubbed her cheek with his thumb. "What is it?"

"I love you so much, Julian," She cried as she looked up at him.

"I love you too." He replied. He was confused but didn't let on.

"I think I took your love for granted and I realized today how precious it is. I don't ever want to lose you—"

"I'm not going anywhere." He said, his voice was strong and sure. "I love you way too damn much to ever let you go."

She smiled up at him through her tears and felt her body explode with goosebumps when he leaned in to kiss her.

Awhile later, Brooke got up and retrieved two sandwiches from a small cooler she had brought with her. "I know it isn't much but I can't eat that cafeteria food much longer. I hope you like roast beef." She said as she handed him a sandwich. "It was the only meat left in the refrigerator that hadn't spoiled."

He smiled at her as he took the sandwich. "You're the best." He grinned.

She had sat back down in his lap and they were laughing as they fed each other bites of roast beef that they didn't see Olivia start to move. Her loud cry brought them out of their own little world and within seconds both of them were by Olivia's side.

Olivia was screaming as she tried to pull the intubation tube out of her throat. Brooke held Olivia's hands down by her side as Julian ran out into the hallway to get a doctor. "I know it hurts, baby," Brooke said as Olivia cried. "The doctors are going to take it out for you. Just hold on for a few more minutes." Tears fell from Brooke's eyes when she saw how scared Olivia was.

"Help!" Julian screamed as he ran down the hallway. "I need help! My daughter just woke up and she's still intubated!"

A flurry of doctors rushed toward Olivia's room and within seconds the tube was out of her mouth. Olivia gagged and coughed as she tried to breathe on her own for the first time since the accident. Julian watched from the foot of the bed in horror as the doctors tried to help his daughter. It was like he was frozen in place and everything that was happening around him was a blur. When Olivia's color returned back to normal and she was no longer struggling to breathe he let out a big sigh of relief before he wrapped his arms around his little girl.

"You scared me so much," He said into her hair. "I am so sorry for what happened in the accident."

"What accident?" Olivia asked innocently as she looked at her dad. "What happened to me? Why am I here?"

Brooke and Julian nervously looked at the doctor. "Olivia," the doctor said. "Can you tell me who this is?" He placed his hand on Julian's shoulder.

"My daddy." Olivia said matter-of-factly.

Julian, Brooke and the doctor smiled at Olivia. "Good job," The doctor grinned. "What about her? Can you tell me who she is?" He asked as he moved toward Brooke.

Olivia stared up at Brooke for what seemed like an eternity before shaking her head. "I don't know." She said sadly.

Brooke fought back the tears that were seconds away from falling. "It's okay," she said as she tried to smile. "My name is Brooke."

Olivia nodded and repeated her name a few times.

The doctor asked Olivia several other questions before excusing himself from the room and asking Brooke and Julian to join him in the hall. Julian had wrapped Brooke in his arms the second they exited the room and she let the tears fall that she had been holding back for so long.

"Why doesn't she remember Brooke?" Julian asked the doctor. "She remembers everything else."

"Memory loss is something that is extremely hard to understand. It's hard to study because it is different for everyone. The good news is though is that she remembers 99% of everything up until the accident." The doctor offered a weak smile. "It's not uncommon for those involved in a serious accident like Olivia to forget what happened to them, in fact it's better that she doesn't remember. She would most likely suffer from nightmares and refuse to get in a car because she's scared the accident will happen again."

"What are we supposed to do about Brooke? Will Olivia ever remember who she is?" Julian asked.

The doctor shrugged. "It's tough to say. Her memory may return out of the blue one day or she may never remember her life before the accident with Brooke. I'd recommend going about your lives as if nothing has changed. If Olivia spent a lot of time with Brooke, don't change that. By spending time together it may trigger her brain into remembering who she is." He glanced down at his chart. "We'll keep an eye on her for the rest of the day and night but I have a feeling you'll be heading home with your daughter tomorrow morning."

The doctor turned and walked away leaving Julian standing in the middle of the corridor with an inconsolable Brooke in his arms. "She'll remember who you are," He whispered in her hair. "You're impossible to forget." As he swayed back and forth with her he couldn't help but doubt his words. What if Olivia didn't remember? Would that change his relationship with Brooke? Would Brooke start to close him out? He didn't want to find out. He wouldn't find out. Olivia would remember who Brooke was.

x-x-x

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	16. Chicken Parmesan

Chapter Sixteen: Chicken Parmesan

"Julian," Brooke sighed. "It's going to be okay. Nothing is going to happen."

Julian shook his head. "You can't promise that."

Olivia had been discharged from the hospital thirty minutes earlier and Brooke and Olivia had been in the car ever since. Julian refused to get in. Olivia didn't understand why her father was pacing outside the car with tears in his eyes. "Daddy," She called through the open window. "Come on! I want to go home!"

Brooke could see Julian mumbling to himself which made her nervous. "Will you be okay for a few minutes while I talk to your daddy?" Brooke asked as she turned to face Olivia who was strapped in her car seat in the backseat.

Olivia nodded. "Tell him to hurry up! I want to get home!"

Brooke smiled. "I know, sweetie. We'll be there soon."

Olivia had taken to Brooke pretty easily. It was hard for Brooke to look at Olivia and remember the past five months they had spent together and know that Olivia didn't remember any of it. She though, surprisingly, had taken the news of Olivia's memory loss better than Julian. He had struggled all night to grasp the fact that his daughter had no recollection of who Brooke was. He had told Olivia that he and Brooke were dating but she didn't show any emotion which made his heart break even more. He remembered when he and Brooke had first told her a few weeks before and how excited she had been.

"Hey," Brooke said softly as she walked up to Julian who was pacing in front of the car. "Come here." She pulled him in to her arms and turned so Olivia saw her face instead of Julian's. She knew Julian was crying and if Olivia saw that she would start crying as well. "I know you're scared to get in the car but you're going to have to do it eventually. The house isn't that far away and I'll drive as slow as you want me to." She whispered in his ear. "I promise that nothing is going to happen to us."

"All I can hear is the crunch of the metal and the shrill of her screams. I can't get the noises out of my head, Brooke." He cried on her shoulder.

Brooke closed her eyes; she couldn't begin to imagine what he was going through. "Olivia needs her dad right now. She needs you to be strong for her while she recovers and tries to regain her memory. I know you're scared but that's why I'm here. When you're scared and vulnerable, I'm strong and steady and here to get you through. You need to get Olivia through, though. I'll be strong for you if you can be strong for her."

His voice was soft but she heard him loud and clear. "Okay." He whispered against her neck.

She pulled away so that she was looking him in the eye. "You can do this. Just squeeze my hand when you get scared or feel anxious. I'm here for you, Julian."

He leaned in to kiss her passionately. "I love you." He said as he pressed his forehead against hers. "More than you will ever know."

"I have a pretty good idea," She smiled up at him. "I love you, too."

Brooke slid in behind the wheel and waited for Julian to open the car door.

"Daddy!" Olivia called. "We're waiting!"

It took a few minutes but Julian eventually got into the car. He turned and smiled at his daughter before trying to get as comfortable as he could in the car. Brooke watched him close his eyes and noticed that he had begun to nervously shake his leg. She turned the key in the ignition which brought the car to life and he grew even more uneasy. She put the car in drive before reaching for Julian's hand. He interlaced their fingers and squeezed hard the moment he felt her skin come into contact with his. As he felt the car accelerate, his grip on Brooke's hand tightened and she didn't mind one bit.

x-x-x

Olivia unbuckled herself before Brooke had turned the car off after pulling into the driveway. The house looked bigger somehow to Brooke as she looked up at it. She felt Julian's hand on the small of her back as he led her toward the house. "Why don't you go shower while I start some lunch?" She suggested.

He nodded. "What about Olivia?"

"We'll be fine." Brooke assured him. "We're just starting over."

They could hear Olivia up in her room greeting all of her stuffed animals that she had missed so much. "How are you so okay with this?" He asked. "She forgets who you are and yet I'm having a harder time coming to terms with it than you."

Brooke shrugged. "I guess it's because I know there's nothing I can do about it. It is what it is and I'm not going to dwell on her memory loss when I could be making new memories with her. Yes, it's hard to look at her and think of all the things we've shared over the past five months but that's all it was…five months. It's not like it was five years of memories she forgot because _that_ would be something I would have a very hard time accepting. All that matters is that she's okay and so are you because I don't know what I would do if I didn't have both of you in my life."

"Okay, then." Julian smiled at her. "I'll be down in a little bit."

Brooke had started to pull out ingredients that she would need for the meal she was about to prepare. When she turned around after getting the chicken out of the refrigerator she jumped. "Olivia!" She exclaimed as she placed her hand over her heart. "You scared me!"

Olivia was standing before her, staring.

"What's wrong?" Brooke asked as she crouched down to Olivia's height.

"Am I supposed to know who you are?"

Brooke nodded. "It's okay that you don't, though. We only knew each other five months before the accident—"

Olivia tilted her head. "What accident?"

Brooke wished Julian wasn't up in the shower but instead by her side helping her explain what happened to Olivia. "The reason you don't remember who I am is because you and your daddy were in a car accident a few days ago. That's why you feel sore and have that cast on your arm," She said as she nodded toward Olivia's left arm.

Olivia paled. "How come I don't remember that either?"

Brooke could tell that Olivia was scared by the quiver in her voice. "Sometimes things happen to our brains that make us forget certain things or people for reasons we can't explain. I know it can be scary but that's why you have me and your daddy, we're here for you, bumblebee."

Olivia looked up at her. "Why'd you call me a bumblebee?"

Before Brooke could reply, Julian appeared in front of them, his hair still dripping wet.

"That was fast," Brooke said as she stood back up.

"I couldn't stand being away from my two favorite girls for very long." He said as he scooped Olivia into his arms. "What're you making for lunch?"

"Chicken parmesan," Brooke said as she turned the oven on. "I figured we haven't had much to eat the past few days so this will really fill us up."

Over the next hour, the three hung out in the kitchen while Brooke cooked. Olivia sat on Julian's lap and there were moments it was as if the accident had never happened. Those moments were few and far between, however.

"This is really good." Olivia said in between mouthfuls of pasta and chicken. "You're a way better cook than daddy."

Julian looked at Brooke. "That's because Brooke is a chef, sweetheart. It's her job to make good food."

"Do you have a restaurant?"

Brooke shook her head. "Not yet."

"Well, I think you should have one because you're really good at making food."

x-x-x

Olivia and Julian were exhausted after finishing their lunch. Brooke didn't blame either one of them; the medicine Olivia was on made her drowsy and Julian hadn't slept much since the accident. She offered to clean up the kitchen while Julian and Olivia napped for a little bit. As she washed the dishes, being in the house suddenly became too much. The memories she had made with not only Olivia but Julian as well began to suffocate her so she bolted toward the door, reached for her keys and ran. She drove, unsure of where she was headed, but somehow she ended up in front of the restaurant Julian had bought for her.

She had accomplished a lot in the few weeks she had been working on the interior. She looked around and couldn't help but feel proud of what she had done so far not only with the restaurant but with her life in general. It was times like these she felt embarrassed for thinking about ending her life right after Owen had died. Just because he died didn't mean she had to die too. As she sat down in an empty booth she began to think about her relationship with Owen. She loved him with every ounce of her being but she never loved him like she loved Julian. The two couldn't compare.

She began to wander around the empty restaurant thinking about what she could do with the place. Owning a restaurant would be a lot of work, it would mean a lot of time away from Julian and Olivia, at least in the beginning. Was her dream worth all of that? As she stood in the kitchen she thought back to the day she and Julian had tried to make tomato soup but ended up burning it instead. It was then that she discovered her dream. It didn't include measuring cups, chef hats and filet mignon but instead Barbies, bedtime stories and tea parties. A year ago it had been her dream to own a restaurant but Julian and Olivia had changed that; now all she wanted was for them to be a family. She hadn't known the love and satisfaction a man and child could bring to her life until she walked into Julian and Olivia's.

She could make this work, she thought to herself. She could have both dreams; the one she wanted before and the one she realized after spending the five most amazing months of her life with the two people that had become her world. With Julian's help the restaurant would be up and running in no time and she'd be able to balance work and play. She could do this.

x-x-x

She had stayed at the restaurant much later than she had intended but she had made lots of progress. New chairs, booths and tables had been ordered. The light fixtures were set to arrive on Wednesday and the plumber was coming on Thursday to take care of the bathroom. When she left, she was surprised to see that the sun had been replaced by the moon and stars. As she drove home she debated on calling the house but decided not to incase Julian or Olivia was still sleeping.

Brooke checked on Olivia when she got home and was happy to find her sleeping peacefully in her bed. She then peeked into Julian's room and discovered that he was sleeping as well.

"Brooke?" His voice was thick and full of sleep.

"I was just checking on you," She whispered. "Go back to sleep."

"Come here." He said as he patted the spot next to him.

She climbed into his large bed and scooted in close to him, she had missed the feeling of his body against hers. He wrapped his arms around her not wanting to ever let go. She closed her eyes but opened them when she heard his voice. "Tell me something about you that I don't know."

"What?"

"I need you to help me get my mind off of Olivia. Tell me something I don't know about you." He repeated.

"My parents died when I was twelve."

He pulled back so he was looking at her. "Oh, god, I'm so sorry." He said as he ran his fingers through her hair.

She shook her head. "It's okay. It happened a long time ago."

"Do you mind if I ask what happened?"

"They had a boating accident." She said softly as she began to lazily rub his arm. "We got caught in a storm, the boat capsized—"

"You were there?" Julian asked as his eyes went wide. "I thought you were scared of the ocean."

"I am. My dad had promised that nothing would happen and after an hour of coaxing I finally got on. We were incredibly close so I trusted him when he said that and that day I thought I had gotten over my fear until we hit the storm."

He could feel her body become tense against his. "How did you survive?" He asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

"My dad had dispatched to the coastguard and they were able to locate us. I was the first one they rescued and my mom was supposed to be next but the boat capsized before they could reach her. All I remember doing is screaming for the divers to go after them but they said it was too dangerous and there was no way my parents would have survived in the water for more than three minutes due to the force of the storm."

"They said that to you?"

Brooke nodded. "I screamed and fought and kicked as they tried to carry me down to the cabin of the boat. I refused to leave my parents behind but I had no choice. I was only twelve and I couldn't fight the men in the coastguard no matter how hard I tried." She paused for a moment before continuing. "Their bodies were never recovered."

"Baby," He whispered in her hair. "I am so sorry." He knew that it was trite but he couldn't think of anything else to say. He thought back to the day he took her out on his boat and how scared and frightened she had been when the storm hit. He couldn't even imagine what she was going through that night they weathered the storm together in the cabin of the boat. "Who took care of you?"

"I moved in with my best friend Peyton and her dad Larry. Most of the time is was just me and Peyton because Larry worked on a dredging boat and spent months away from home at a time." She paused to yawn. "When are your parents coming home, by the way? They must be concerned about Liv."

"I called them before I laid down for my nap. They're leaving London first thing tomorrow morning. I told them they didn't need to rush home because she's just fine but they refused."

"Good," Brooke said as she nestled closer. "I miss them."

"They miss you too." He replied before he kissed the top of her head. He began to tell her about everything his parents had done and seen in London but when he heard the soft sound of her snore he couldn't help but smile to himself.

x-x-x

The next morning Brooke woke to an empty bed. She wandered downstairs expecting to find Julian in the kitchen or in the living room with a cup of tea. He was nowhere to be found. As she neared the fridge she saw a note taped to the freezer.

_John picked me up early this morning; had to go to the office to get my mind off of everything. Don't know when I'll be back. _

_-Julian_

She read the note a dozen times and it still didn't make sense to her. He hadn't even signed it with _love…_just Julian. As she heard Olivia's small footsteps overhead, Brooke could only hope that Julian wasn't slipping back into his old ways when his work consumed his life.

x-x-x

Review please!


	17. Goldfish

Chapter Seventeen: Goldfish 

Nothing had changed much in the three weeks since the accident. Well, nothing and everything. Olivia still didn't remember who Brooke was but their relationship had grown leaps and bounds in the past twenty-one days. That was no thanks to Julian, however. He had poured himself into his work so much that it nearly consumed him. Brooke and Olivia hardly ever saw him since he was back to his routine of leaving before they were up and returning after they had gone to bed. Brooke had made more progress than she ever could imagine on the restaurant in such a short amount of time. Olivia had stayed out of school for a few days after the accident but since she had returned, Brooke spent nearly every waking moment in the restaurant.

She was unsure where she and Julian stood. She knew he still loved and cared about her because he'd sneak into her room late at night when he'd get home and when he held her in his arms it was as if nothing was wrong. The fact that he had slipped into his old ways was wrong, she knew, but she was scared to call him out on it. He was fragile and wounded and this was just his way of dealing with the accident he felt responsible for. He would turn around…or so she hoped.

x-x-x

Brooke leaned against the car as she waited for Olivia to get out of school. She had promised to take Olivia to the aquarium for being such a good sport with her cast the past couple weeks.

"Brooke!" Olivia squealed when she saw her.

"Hey you," Brooke smiled. "How was your day?"

"Good," Olivia shrugged as she started to eat the bag of Goldfish that Brooke had brought for her. "But all I could think about was the aquarium."

As Brooke drove, Olivia babbled on and on about school and how she and Tyler were still together. When Brooke came to a stop in front of the aquarium, she watched Olivia's jaw drop. "This place is amazing!" She shrieked from the backseat.

Brooke turned to face Olivia. "You've never been to the aquarium before?"

Olivia shook her head as she started to unbuckle herself. "C'mon!"

Olivia was in awe with everything in the aquarium. They had spent over a half hour watching the tropical fish swim with the large sea turtles as Olivia ran alongside the glass paneling trying to keep up with a fish. As they walked toward the penguin exhibit Olivia looked up at Brooke.

"Can I ask you questions?"

Brooke squeezed the little girl's hand. "Of course."

"How long before the accident were you and my daddy together?"

"I've only know you and your dad for about five months." Brooke replied.

"How did you meet us?"

Brooke sighed as she led Olivia to a bench in front of some freshwater fish. "You were left in the park by one of your nannies and I just happened to be in the right place at the right time. You and I clicked instantly and from there we sort of became a family, you me and your dad."

Olivia looked down at her lap. "I'm sorry I don't remember any of that."

Brooke wrapped her arm around Olivia's small body. "It's not your fault, sweetheart."

"My dad used to spend so much time at work that he never saw me but then something happened and it was the opposite. He was always with me and never at work but ever since the car crash he hasn't spent any time with me. Do you know what happened that made him stop working so much?"

"I did."

Olivia's eyes widened. "How?"

"I told him that you are the most important thing in his life and he better start making an effort to be in your life because a little girl needs her daddy more than anything."

"Do you think I did something to make him mad?"

Brooke shook her head. "Why would you ask that?"

"Because he's never home now. I did something to cause the accident, didn't I? That's why he spends so much time at work because he's mad at me for ruining everything."

"Olivia," Brooke said as she pulled her onto her lap. "You didn't do anything to cause the accident and neither did your dad. It just happened. Daddy's just having a hard time dealing with everything right now but he'll get better."

"I hope so," Olivia sighed. "I miss him."

x-x-x

Brooke sat in the kitchen tapping a pencil against a pad of paper as she waited for Julian to return from work. She had put Olivia to bed hours ago and was thinking about turning in herself but she couldn't. Julian needed to be confronted. She sighed as she looked at the digital clock on the microwave. 1:37. Where the hell could he be at 1:30 in the morning? She had been trying to come up with a name for the restaurant since that was the only thing she had left to do, well that, and hire a wait staff. For the past two hours she had stared down at the blank notepad in frustration.

"Finally," She murmured when she saw John's headlights through the front window. She stood up and took one last sip of the red wine she had been sipping on before she walked toward the front door.

"Holy shit," Julian exclaimed when he walked into the house and saw Brooke standing before him. "You scared me."

Brooke offered a weak smile. "Where have you been?"

"I didn't tell you?" Julian asked as he placed his briefcase down. "John and I had a movie premiere to attend and then we had to go to the after party because—"

"Enough." Brooke said as she held up her hand. "Just enough already."

He made his way toward her but as he tried to snake his arm around her waist, she stepped back. "Brooke, what's wrong?"

"I've given you your space. I've tried to understand why you'd rather spend time at the office than here with us. I've made excuses for you and I've lied to Olivia for you but I'm not doing it anymore. I can't Julian." She said softly.

Julian sighed as he sank down in a chair at the kitchen table. "I'm sorry," He mumbled as he ran his hand down his face. "This is just what I do. When things get hard I ignore them and turn to my work. I –"

"Don't use that excuse." Brooke said as she sat down next to him. "I might have let that slide five months ago but not today. You have me now and do you know how much it hurts when you don't talk to me? I want to help you through this but I can't if you're not willing to let me. I have no idea how to help you when you run away and refuse to deal with the problems that are plaguing you. You need to let me in, Julian, all the way in."

He nodded. "Can I tell you something?"

Brooke reached for his hand. "Anything."

"I want to move."

She furrowed her brow. "Why?"

He sighed as he leaned back in the chair. "When Kate came to the hospital, all I could think about was how did she know? And then it dawned on me. The accident aired on the local news. She lives around here, Brooke. Do you know how mad that made me? What if she watches Olivia? What if for the past five years she's kept a watchful eye on me and my daughter without me knowing? I can't live here knowing she could only be ten minutes down the street."

"I don't think you have to worry about that." She said as she squeezed his hand.

"Why would you say that?"

"This isn't the way I wanted to tell you but when I went home from the hospital to shower the day after the accident I kind of ran into Kate—well actually she kind of cornered me."

Julian sat up. "Did you tell her to go to hell?"

"Not exactly," Brooke said. "We went for a drive down to the beach and she explained things to me."

"What things?" Julian demanded as he stood up and began to pace back and forth.

Brooke shrugged. "Just why she left and how she feels about you and Olivia. She didn't leave to hurt you; she did it because she knew you two weren't right together and she didn't want Olivia growing up in a house where all you and Kate do is fight."

Julian stared at Brooke. "And you believe her?"

She nodded.

"After everything I told you about Kate you believe _her_?" Julian roared. "I can't believe you would even give her the time of day! You know how badly she hurt me when she walked out that door! You know the pain she caused me and how I couldn't even look at Olivia! You knew all of this yet you had no problem chatting her up and falling for her bullshit!"

"It wasn't bullshit." Brooke snapped.

"Don't defend her." Julian yelled.

"Don't tell me what to do!"

Unbeknownst to them, Olivia had awoken due to the yelling and she sat, paralyzed, at the top of the staircase listening to Brooke and Julian scream at each other. Olivia wasn't sure when, but suddenly the conversation had shifted to her.

"All that little girl wants is for her dad to pay attention to her," Brooke yelled as she pointed above her. "She thinks the reason you're never home is because you're mad at her for causing the accident."

"That's ridiculous," Julian scoffed.

"Maybe to you but when you're five years old and daddy isn't around anymore but he was before the accident, it's really not that far-fetched of an idea." Brooke pointed out. "I spend every waking moment with her while you're off gallivanting—"

"I'm working!" Julian yelled. "And nobody asked you to spend every waking moment with her!"

"Newsflash!" Brooke screamed. "You did! You pretty much begged me to be her nanny that night you came home to find me cooking in your kitchen!"

"Well I never asked you to become her mother!" He yelled as he slammed his fist down on the granite countertop.

Brooke stepped away as if she had been burned. "Neither did I but somewhere along the way I feel in love with her and you."

"Well, maybe that was a mistake."

"Which part?"

"All of it." Julian said as he shook his head. "We were fine the way we were before you sauntered into our lives and fixed everything. You must feel like the biggest hero; you think you saved us. Well, newsflash, you didn't."

Brooke struggled to keep her tears at bay; she refused to let him see her cry, to let him think that he had won. "You were fine the way you were?" She asked in disbelief, her voice a whisper. "I'm sorry that you feel like this was a mistake," She said as she gestured around her. "I'm sorry that you feel like the family we created wasn't supposed to be and I'm sorry I fell in love with you if you feel the way you do about us but there is one thing I will never be sorry for. I love Olivia so much it hurts and I know you never asked me to be her mother but neither did I. It just happened and it's absolutely killing me that she has no idea who I am but you wouldn't know that because you're never around. You don't see the tears I cry when she's not around because neither are you." She said as she struggled to maintain her composure. "That little girl has so much life and love inside of her that you were lucky to witness at one point but then you screwed it up by turning your back on her when she needed you the most. She's not always going to be naïve enough to forgive you every time you screw up. There's going to come a day when you do something to her that she won't be willing to forgive and I won't be there to put the pieces back together."

"What are you saying?" Julian asked afraid of what her answer might be.

Brooke shrugged. "I think I just need some time to figure things out." She turned to go upstairs and was surprised when Julian didn't say anything to stop her.

x-x-x

He sat at the kitchen table with his head in his hands. When he heard movement upstairs, he scampered to his feet and made his way toward the stairs. The sight before him nearly took his breath away. "Whe-where are you going?" He asked when he saw her with a suitcase.

"I need to get away for a little while."

"Where are you going to go, though? A hotel? Can I visit—"

"I'm going home. To Tree Hill."

Julian felt his knees buckle as he held onto the railing for support. "What about Olivia?"

"What about her?" Brooke sighed. "She doesn't know who I am and I doubt she's ever going to remember. I'll keep in touch with her but for you and me this is goodbye."

"Goodbye?" Julian repeated. "Goodbye means your never coming back. What about the restaurant?" He asked. "What about us, Brooke?"

"You just told me that we were a mistake," She said as she began to wheel her suitcase toward the door. "Where do you think that leaves us?"

He knew he should have said something, anything, but he couldn't. So, instead, he watched her walk out of his life without a word. As he sank down against the door she had just walked out of, he let the tears fall that he had been holding in ever since they had started screaming at each other. He suddenly paused for a moment and listened.

He held her in his arms as she cried. He wasn't sure just how much Olivia had heard, but he figured enough to know that Brooke had left. He had no idea where to go next or what to say when Olivia started asking the questions he knew she would ask. He had screwed up many times before but this time it was different…this time he didn't know how to fix what he had done.

x-x-x

Review please!


	18. Turkey Burgers

Chapter Eighteen: Turkey Burgers

Her flight had been miserable; there was a baby who cried the entire five hours, the man next to her smelt like a ham sandwich and the plane had to circle the airport in North Carolina for about an hour because of a thunderstorm in the area. None of that mattered now, though, as she was on her way to the place she knew she could always go no matter what and she knew that the moment she saw them that they'd make everything better.

She knocked twice before opening the front door. "Hello?" She called throughout the house.

"Aunt Brooke!" Jamie exclaimed in disbelief as he charged toward her. "I missed you!"

Brooke smiled when she felt Jamie wrap his arms around her. "I missed you so much, bud," She said as she hugged him. "You've gotten so big!"

Jamie smiled proudly. "I grew an inch and half since the last time my dad measured me."

Brooke looked around the house. "Speaking of your dad, where are he and your mom?"

"Out by the pool with Lydia, they're teaching her how to swim." He said as he took hold of Brooke's hand and led her to the back deck.

When she saw Nathan and Haley smiling and laughing in the pool while helping Lydia, she couldn't help the twinge of jealousy she felt. She had that with Julian and Olivia at one point and now that she didn't she felt lost.

"Momma!" Jamie called out. "Look!"

Haley looked over at her son for a moment but did a double take when she saw Brooke standing beside him. "Brooke! Oh my gosh! What are you doing here?" She exclaimed as she walked toward the steps in the pool. As Haley wrapped a towel around her, Nathan scooped Lydia up and made his way out of the pool as well.

All it took was to be wrapped in Haley's embrace for the tears to fall. She hadn't cried since she left Julian standing in the foyer of the house. Haley looked at Nathan who shrugged as he toweled Lydia off. As Haley tried her best to console Brooke, Nathan ushered Jamie and Lydia into the house toward the playroom so he could help Haley.

Nathan returned to find his wife and Brooke sitting on the edge of the pool with their feet dangling into the water. He sidled up on the other side of Brooke and wrapped his arm around her. "Hi Nate," She sighed as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"What's up?" He asked as he eyed Haley, unsure if Brooke had said anything yet.

"Julian and I got into a pretty big fight."

"Big enough for you to fly all the way across the country?" Haley asked.

Brooke nodded. "He told me that we were a mistake and that we never should have happened in the first place."

Nathan hadn't met Julian but based on what little Brooke had said, he didn't like him. Brooke was like a sister to him and watching her suffer after Owen had died was one of the most difficult things he had to live through. He wanted to take her pain away, he wanted to protect her but there was nothing he could do.

He and Haley listened as Brooke told them what had happened the night before. She started with the accident and how Olivia didn't remember who she was, about how Julian had begun to retract into his old habits and the fight that had them screaming at each other while Olivia slept overhead.

"I don't know why I left," Brooke said as she shook her head. "I shouldn't have. I shouldn't have left Olivia like that. She's going to be even more confused when she wakes up and discovers that I'm gone. I've been the most consistent thing in her life ever since the accident and I just left her."

"It's going to be okay," Haley assured her. "You can call Olivia and tell her that you'll be back in a little bit."

"Julian made it pretty clear that we were a mistake—"

"He didn't mean it, Brooke." Haley said.

Brooke looked up at Nathan. "What do you think?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I've never met him so I have no basis on which to judge him but the fact that he hurt you so much that you came running home doesn't sit well with me."

Brooke nodded. "I want to go back because of Olivia and because I thought what Julian and I had was something that rivaled the fairytale stories I was told as a kid…"

"But?" Haley prodded.

"But how am I supposed to rekindle a relationship the man I love thought was a mistake in the first place?"

Nathan and Haley were at a loss for words; they didn't know how to make this better for Brooke. They sat in silence at the pool's edge for a while before Brooke finally broke it.

"I'll be okay." She said softly. "I mean, did I see myself married to Julian and raising a big family? Yes. But I also saw that with Owen and that didn't work out either. Maybe there's another man out there that I'm meant to spend the rest of my life with." She looked behind her where she heard Jamie and Lydia laughing from within the house. "I have to believe that."

x-x-x

Olivia hadn't said anything all day. Julian had called his parents and asked if they could watch Olivia while he took care of a few things at the office. They had happily obliged. Before Julian had left for work he had tried his best to explain that Brooke needed some time away from him for a little bit. He assured his daughter that she had nothing to do with why Brooke left, it was his fault not hers.

Paul had just gone up to check on his granddaughter who had fallen asleep on the ride back from the grocery store. "She hasn't said a word all day," Paul said as he shook his head. "Should we be concerned?"

Diane stopped chopping celery. "I think she's just a little confused as to what happened last night."

"You know what happened last night?" Paul eyed his wife.

She shook her head. "I don't know the specifics but I think it's pretty clear that something big happened between Brooke and Julian and she had enough and left."

Paul sat down at the kitchen table. "Do you think she's going to come back?"

Diane shrugged. "I don't even know where she went, Paul. For all we know she could be right up the street at the Hilton or she could be back in San Francisco at her old apartment."

x-x-x

Julian sat at his desk staring at the Los Angeles skyline. He hadn't accomplished anything in the six hours he had been at the office. All he could think about was Brooke and he had replayed what had happened the night before ad nauseam. He kicked himself for not going after her, for not professing his love for her in the middle of the airport right before she was to board her flight. He knew it was his entire fault; that Brooke had been right with everything she had said but he didn't want to believe it at the time.

He swiveled his chair around and looked at the picture he had on his desk. Olivia was looking at the camera and smiling while Brooke's eyes were closed since she was laughing so hard. The picture had been taken on the front lawn on Saturday afternoon when they had planted some shrubs. The picture reminded him of how much he had lost in the past twelve hours and the ache in his heart grew larger. He hadn't meant what he had said about his relationship with Brooke being a mistake; it was actually the best thing that had ever happened to him. He suddenly stood up and walked out of the office, the picture clutched in his hand.

x-x-x

After Brooke showered and unpacked, she returned to the kitchen to find Haley and Nathan cooking dinner. She had been so grateful when they told her she could stay for as long as she needed as she didn't have anywhere else to go.

"So," Brooke said as she leaned against the counter. "How's Peyton?"

Nathan eyed Haley. "You really want to know?"

Brooke nodded.

"She and Luke worked things out about a month or so after she and Haley got back from visiting you." Nathan said. "Turns out all they needed was a weekend away, just the two of them, to figure things out."

"They should be here anytime," Haley added. "I invited them over for dinner."

A few minutes later the door bell rang before Lucas and Peyton made their way into the house with their daughter Abby in tow. "Brooke!" Peyton exclaimed when she saw the brunette. "You're home!"

Brooke ran toward her best friend and the two of them nearly fell over in excitement as they jumped and hugged in the living room. "I've missed you so much." Brooke told her.

"What are you doing home?" Peyton asked. "Is Julian here? What about Olivia?"

Nathan stood behind Brooke trying to get Peyton's attention but he had failed. Brooke's demeanor had changed drastically since she had arrived and he worried that she would become sad again at the mention of Julian and Olivia. Much to his surprise, Brooke seemed fine.

"Julian and I aren't together anymore." She said. "I left last night."

Peyton's jaw dropped. "Oh, sweetie," She said as she pulled Brooke into a hug. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," Brooke replied. "I'm going to be fine."

Peyton didn't believe her. She had seen how hard Brooke had fallen for Julian in such a short amount of time. She had seen the mother-daughter relationship Brooke had forged with Olivia. Peyton knew Brooke was just putting on a strong façade for everyone but when no one was around, the walls would fall and she would be a crumpled mess of tears.

"Well, I feel really bad but I have something I've been dying to tell you," Peyton said as she reached for Lucas' hand. "You're going to have another baby to spoil rotten in couple months." Peyton was beaming as Lucas placed his hand on his wife's flat stomach.

Brooke was overwhelmed with emotion. Tears spilled from her eyes as she hugged Peyton and Lucas. "I'm so happy for you guys," She said. "When are you due?"

"I'm only six weeks along so not until the end of November." Peyton replied. "But we can't stop smiling ever since we found out. We told Nathan and Haley yesterday and I was going to call you today to let you know but telling you in person is so much better."

As they all settled in at the dining room table for dinner, Brooke could help but feel content. She was home and no matter how much she loved her life in LA she missed Tree Hill more than she would ever admit.

"Are you home for good?" Lucas asked as he passed Brooke the mashed potatoes.

"I'm not sure," she shrugged. "The way Julian and I left things makes me think that I might be but I miss Olivia so much."

"Who's Olivia?" Lucas asked. Nathan knew she was Julian's daughter but other than that he was in the dark.

"She's Julian's daughter." Brooke replied. "She's five years old and the smartest, funniest and kindest little girl. Her mom left when she was a week old and she's had more than a dozen nannies care for her. Somehow we just clicked."

"She calls Brooke 'mom'." Haley informed Nathan and Lucas to which they raised their eyebrows.

"She does?" Nathan asked.

"She did," Brooke said softly. "But only a few times and each time she did I set the record straight with her."

"Did you like when she did?" Lucas asked.

"Guys," Haley sighed. "Don't do this to her right now. It's been a rough twenty-four hours for her—"

"It's fine, Hales," Brooke interrupted. "Yeah, Luke, I did. I thought of her as my daughter and it killed me when she woke up from her coma and didn't remember who I was."

Nathan had stopped eating and opened his mouth to ask a question he needed to know the answer to. "More so than when you woke up in the hospital to find out that Owen hadn't made it?"

"Nathan!" Haley chided. "Why the hell would you ask her that?"

The room went silent and Brooke knew they were waiting for her answer.

"You don't have to say anything," Peyton said softly. "We don't—"

"Yes." Brooke said, her voice strong and sure. "It absolutely wrecked me to find out that Olivia had no recollection of who I was more so than that day I woke up to discover Owen was gone. I can't tell you why but it did and I had to suffer by myself because the one man I thought would be there to get me through shut me out. I had to spend every waking moment with a girl who used to call me mom and I would have to tell her that I was just her nanny but you have no idea how I longed for her to call me mom just one more time and she probably never will again because I left her. I left her when I promised her I wouldn't." Brooke was hunched over at the dinner table, her head in her hands as she cried the tears Nathan and Haley had been waiting for ever since she first arrived. The reality of the whole situation had sunk in and Brooke had realized how alone she was without Julian or Olivia.

Nathan, feeling guilty for Brooke's emotional breakdown, stood up and made his way toward the sobbing brunette. He scooped Brooke up in his arms and carried her up the stairs toward the guest room. He pulled down the covers and gently placed her down but to his surprise, she didn't let go.

"Please don't leave me." She begged through her tears. "Please."

"I won't." He whispered as he crawled into bed with her. Brooke was hesitant at first to be laying in bed with her best friend's husband but she had been friends with Nathan ever since she could remember and considered him the brother she always wanted but never had. Nathan had always looked out for her, protected her, and loved her unconditionally. He was the one who had been there every day for her following her parent's boating accident. He was the one who had sat with her in the hospital after Owen had died and while her burns healed. He was the only person that knew she had tried to take her own life after Owen had passed away.

As she rested her head on his chest, he thought about how different things could have been had she succeeded in overdosing on her pain medication. She wouldn't be lying in his arms, brokenhearted. She wouldn't be there at all. He squeezed her tight and lightly kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

Nathan had finally calmed her down enough so that her body was no longer shaking. "Olivia's going to be okay, Brooke."

"You don't know that." She whispered.

"No," He said softly. "I suppose I don't but I have to believe that she will be because she knew you."

Brooke remained silent for a few moments and Nathan had suspected she had fallen asleep. "I wanted to marry him. I wanted him to come chasing after me and propose in the middle of the airport with everybody staring at us. I wanted him to tell me that he couldn't imagine spending another day without me in his life and that he wanted me to be his wife and Olivia's mother. I wanted to get married on the beach and honeymoon in Spain. I wanted to open the restaurant on a Saturday afternoon with him and Olivia by my side. I wanted to feel our child growing inside of me. I wanted to live happily ever after with him, Nate. I wanted to be the one who got the happy ending. I wanted all of that…"

Nathan held her tighter in his arms. "You deserve to have all of that." He told her.

x-x-x

"Julian!" Diane exclaimed when she saw her son walk through the front door. "What are you doing home?"

"Where's Olivia?" He asked as he looked around for his daughter.

"Upstairs," Paul said. "We were just going to wake her for lunch. Your mom made turkey burgers if you want one."

Julian ignored his parents as he bounded up the staircase. He found Olivia sitting in bed coloring in the _Let's Learn German!_ coloring book Brooke had given her for her birthday. "Baby," he said as he sat down on the edge of her bed. "Do you remember this day?" He held the picture in front of him.

Olivia didn't look up.

"Liv," he pleaded. "Look at daddy. Look at the picture for me." When she didn't respond, he picked her up and carried her out of the room.

They sat on the front lawn where the picture had been taken for over an hour. Diane and Paul had told him he was being ridiculous, that Olivia would remember Brooke on her own accord and that he couldn't force her to remember. What connection did Brooke and the front lawn hold to Olivia?

"The sat out here looking for bumblebees all afternoon while I planted those shrubs," Julian explained as he nodded to the left. "Bumblebees are special to them; it's something only the two of them understand." He said softly.

"Why don't you go and find Brooke?" Paul suggested. "We can stay here and watch Olivia."

Julian shook his head. "If I go, Olivia goes and besides, I don't even know where to find her in Tree Hill."

"Tree Hill?" Diane repeated. "She went all the way back to North Carolina?"

Julian nodded. "Where'd you think she went?"

"Up the street to the hotel, my god, Julian, what did you do that sent her all the way across the country?"

"I said some things I never should have said." He replied.

The three of them were so caught up in their conversation that they didn't notice Olivia standing in front of them.

"Daddy." Olivia said for the fourth time.

Julian finally heard her. "What is it sweetie?" He asked as he pulled her onto his lap.

"I'm her bumblebee."

Paul and Diane were beyond confused when they saw their son with tears in his eyes.

"Yes you are, baby girl. You're her little bumblebee." He wrapped Olivia tightly in his arms not wanting to ever let her go.

"What's going on?" Paul asked.

"I remember." Olivia said simply.

"You remember what?" Diane asked.

"My mom."

"Kate?" Diane and Paul said at the same time.

Olivia shook her head and smiled. "Brooke."

x-x-x

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	19. Hot Dogs

Chapter Nineteen: Hot Dogs

It had been three days since Olivia had remembered who Brooke was. Paul and Diane were still taking care of Olivia while Julian worked so she was surprised when she saw her dad walk through the front door.

"Daddy!" She squealed. "Why are you home?"

Julian lifted Olivia into his arms. "I wanted to spend some time with you." He replied. "Thanks for watching her." He told his parents as they walked toward the front door. "Same time tomorrow?"

Diane nodded. "A North Carolina area code number has been calling for the past few hours. I didn't answer because I didn't know what to say but I think you do." She told her son on her way out the door.

Julian didn't know how to react. Brooke had called. Did that mean she missed him or was she just doing as she said she would do and was trying to get a hold of Olivia? His daughter brought him out of his trance.

"What?" He asked.

"Can we talk?" She asked sounding much more mature than her five-year-old self.

Julian nodded as he placed her down. She ran into the living room and jumped onto the couch before settling in and patting the spot next to her. "When's Brooke going to come home? I miss her."

He knew this moment was coming; he had been surprised that it had taken four days for Olivia to bring Brooke up especially since her memory had come back three days prior. "I'm not sure." Julian answered honestly.

"She's coming back, right? She can't be gone for good, daddy."

He sighed. "You know that you didn't do anything to make her leave, right?"

Olivia nodded. "You did."

Julian was taken aback. "What?"

"You yelled at her and told her that everything was a mistake. You made her run away from us."

Julian stared at his daughter and remained speechless for some time until he found his voice. "You heard us the other night?"

"You were screaming, dad." Olivia rolled her eyes. "It was nighttime and you were supposed to use your indoor voice."

"I know," He nodded. "I'm sorry we woke you up."

"I wish she took me with her."

Julian felt as though he had just been punched in the stomach. "Why would you say that?"

"Are you really asking me that?" Olivia looked down at the pattern on the couch. "She spends time with me and makes me feel like I'm important. She likes me better than her work and would rather be with me unlike you. She loves me—"

"I love you, too." Julian interjected. She had to know that, right?

"You don't act like you do."

"Olivia," His voice was soft and tender as he pulled her onto his lap. "I know I haven't been a very good father to you especially since the accident but I'm trying to change that."

"When Brooke was around you were a good dad." She retorted. "Make her come back."

Julian kissed the top of Olivia's head. "It's not that easy."

"Then let's go get her. She'll want to come back once she knows I remember who she is and after you tell her you're sorry for yelling at her. We're supposed to be a family, daddy, and we can't be unless we're all here together."

x-x-x

It was only ten in the morning but Brooke sat with her feet in the pool nursing a glass of wine. Peyton was in the pool with Abby and Haley had just emerged after throwing a load of laundry in the dryer.

"Brooke," Haley sighed as she bent down to pick up the bottle of red wine. "I don't think this is the best thing for you to be doing."

"Why?" Brooke shrugged. "I've got nothing better to do."

Haley looked to Peyton for help as she sat down on the edge of the pool. She moved the bottle of wine out of Brooke's reach and took the glass out of Brooke's hand and placed it beside her. "I'm not going to let you do this to yourself. You're too good for this, Brooke." Haley said.

Brooke squinted in the sunlight. "I miss him." She paused as she looked at her friend. "I'm just not used to being without him. But I wanted him to think that I was."

Haley wrapped her arm around Brooke's shoulders. "You're going to make it through this and be even better than before."

"I thought that he'd at least try to get in touch with me, that maybe he'd apologize for what he said but I guess I just expected too much." She said.

"Have you spoken to Olivia yet?" Peyton asked.

"I tried calling the house last night but no one picked up." She said as she swirled her feet around in the water.

"Maybe no one was home?" Peyton offered.

Brooke shrugged. "I just want to know that Olivia is okay and that she doesn't hate me for leaving."

"She doesn't." Haley assured her.

Peyton looked at Brooke and could see how badly she was struggling. "Maybe he's not the one for you."

"But what if I'm the one for him?"

x-x-x

It didn't take too much convincing on Olivia's part for Julian to purchase two tickets to North Carolina. Olivia had thrown a few things into a suitcase while her dad had done the same. Much to Olivia's dismay, Julian insisted on making a few stops before they headed to the airport but once they had arrived, Olivia couldn't contain her excitement. It would be her first time on a plane and she knew that in a few hours she would have the family she always wanted.

"Daddy!" Olivia moaned. "Let's go! We're going to miss the plane!"

Julian had just finished purchasing a magazine and coloring book to keep Olivia busy on the plane when the call came over the system that their flight was boarding.

"Ready?" He asked his daughter as he reached for her hand.

Olivia nodded fiercely.

Julian had never heard his daughter laugh as loud as she did when the plane took off. She stared out the window in amazement as everything below her got smaller and smaller. He wasn't sure when she had done so, but he glanced over about half an hour into the flight to find her sound asleep with her head against the window and a smile on her face. During the five hour flight, Julian did his best to learn about the small town of Tree Hill and tried his hardest to locate where she would be staying. He read the newspaper articles about the fire that had claimed Owen's life and from there; he was able to get an address. He searched Nathan and Haley Scott in the White Pages online archive and was able to find their address as well. They would have to know where Brooke was staying; they were her closest friends he had discovered. As he closed his laptop he couldn't help the grin that appeared on his face and rivaled his daughter's.

x-x-x

No one was sure when, or if, Brooke would be returning to Los Angeles so Nathan, Haley, Lucas and Peyton wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. They also figured that if they kept her occupied she wouldn't be able to dwell on her situation with Julian and Olivia.

As Nathan and Lucas cooked burger and hot dogs on the grill and Haley and Peyton lounged beside the pool talking, Brooke hung with Jamie, Lydia and Abby. Jamie, almost eight, chased Abby who was half his age around the backyard while Brooke held Lydia in her arms. Lydia was a month away from her first birthday and Brooke hated how much of Lydia's life she had missed by being in Los Angeles.

"What's your brother doing?" Brooke cooed as Lydia watched Jamie and Abby intently. "Do you want to play?"

Jamie, Abby and Brooke sat in a triangle and rolled a ball to each other while Lydia squealed in delight from her spot in Brooke's lap every time the ball came her way.

"She's good with them." Lucas observed from the deck as he looked at his daughter playing with Brooke.

Nathan nodded. "What do you think of Julian?" He asked as he flipped a burger.

"I don't know," Lucas shrugged. "I haven't met him."

"I know, but she came home in tears Luke. She was all the way on the other side of the country and she ran back so fast I don't think she realized what she was doing until she was on the plane." He said. "When Haley and Peyton came back from their trip out there and said that Brooke was doing okay I thought he was going to protect her. I trusted him to take care of her and he didn't."

"Nate," Lucas said as he placed his hand on his brother's shoulder. "She's a grown woman; she knows how to take care of herself."

Nathan disagreed but didn't feel like arguing so he just nodded. "I guess so." He conceded. The burgers and hot dogs were done and he piled them onto a plate while Lucas called to Brooke and the kids to let them know dinner was ready.

x-x-x

Much to Julian's surprise, Tree Hill was a charming southern town that had been relatively easy to navigate once he got into his rental car. Olivia, having slept the entire flight, was full of energy and anticipation as Julian drove toward Brooke. His GPS led him to a house that rivaled his own in size. Julian skeptically pulled into the driveway, cut the engine and helped Olivia out of the backseat.

"Are you sure we're in the right place, dad?" Olivia asked as they walked toward the front door.

Julian shrugged. "I think so."

"This place looks kind of like our house." She said as she looked around. "Do you know the people who live here?"

He nodded. "Remember when Brooke's friends Haley and Peyton visited?" He waited for Olivia to nod. "This is where Haley lives."

"You never met Haley or Peyton." Olivia pointed out. "Only I did. But why are we here if Haley lives here? Aren't we supposed to be at Brooke's house?"

He could smell the charcoal grill, hot dogs and hamburgers and he could hear laughter coming from the back yard. He stopped in his tracks when he heard the sound of her laugh rise above the rest...he would recognize it anywhere. His grip tightened on Olivia's hand as he led her to the backyard, his pace quickening.

"Daddy," Olivia said as she struggled to keep up. "Aren't we supposed to knock?"

Olivia stopped suddenly when her dad came to a screeching halt on the side yard. She was confused why they had stopped walking and she followed her dad's gaze to the patio where Brooke sat laughing and eating a hamburger. Julian felt her release her grip on his hand and watched as she took off running in Brooke's direction.

"Mommy!" She squealed.

Nathan, Haley, Lucas, Peyton and Brooke all whipped their heads around to see the little girl. Brooke felt as though she was dreaming when she saw Olivia but when she caught the little girl in her arms she knew she wasn't. Tears fell from her eyes as she rocked Olivia back and forth in her arms; she knew everyone was staring at her with wide eyes but she didn't care.

"How did you find me? How did you know—"She stopped as she realized none of it mattered besides Olivia. "Do you remember who I am?" Brooke asked.

A smile crept across Olivia's face as she nodded. "I'm sorry it took me so long."

Brooke tucked a piece of hair behind Olivia's ear. "It wasn't your fault, bumblebee." She pulled Olivia close again and squeezed her tight. "I'm sorry I left without saying goodbye."

"It's okay. We're here now." Olivia replied as she waved her dad over.

Nathan tried to get up but was stalled when Haley placed her hand on his forearm and shook her head. He wanted to give Julian a piece of his mind, to tell him to get lost but he knew that Brooke had to work things out on her own; she wasn't the little girl who once needed protection anymore.

His expression was unreadable as he made his way toward Brooke. She tried her best but she had no idea whether he was mad, sad, happy or excited to see her. "Julian, I am so sorry that I left. I –"

He cut her off midsentence as he pressed his lips against hers. She smiled into the kiss as he deepened it and she pressed her hands against either side of his face. Tears ran down her face and she didn't realize until they pulled apart that they were his tears. She wiped them away from his eyes and he melted into her touch.

"The last four days have been a living hell, Brooke." He said as he took her hands in his own. "I'm lost without you in my life and I know that I said some really hurtful things the other night and I swear if I could take it all back I would. We weren't a mistake, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I'm sorry it took me this long to run after you." He said as he fought back tears. "I want you and Olivia to know something." He said as he glanced down at his daughter before looking back at Brooke. "Before I got on the plane this morning I sold my share of the production company—"

Brooke gasped. "Julian, why would you ever do that? That's your job, you're life—"

"You and Olivia are my life and it shouldn't have taken me this long to figure out. The love I had for my job will never compare to the love I have for you and Olivia. I have more money saved and stashed and in trust funds than I know what to do with and will ever need in my lifetime. When I'm at the office I spend more time staring at a picture of you and Olivia I keep on my desk than I do anything else, that has to mean something, right?"

Brooke was at a loss for words. She was shocked to see him and Olivia and even more shocked that he had quit his job. "Why are you doing this? What are you going to do now?"

"Right now I'm going to ask you to marry me, Brooke." Julian grinned as he got down on one knee.

Peyton and Haley were on the edge of their seats watching the scene before them as if it were a movie. They had both squealed when they saw Julian drop to one knee.

Her knees had begun to shake and her heart raced as the reality of him on bended knee in front of her took hold. Brooke shook her head. "That's not what I meant, Jul—"

"Just hear me out," he begged as his heart started to beat faster. "From the moment I walked into my kitchen to find you cooking everything under the sun the night you found Olivia in the park, I knew you were someone I couldn't let get away. You're funny and intelligent and you stand up to me in ways that no one ever has. I've learned how to be a better person because of you, I want to be someone you're proud to call yours. I'm done messing up and letting you down, Brooke." He paused as he looked at his daughter who had the biggest grin on her face he had ever seen. "You were never just Olivia's nanny, Brooke, from day one you were the mother she never had but always wanted. We became a family the day you walked into our lives and there's no going back now." He grinned. "You've made me believe in love and I know that you and I are meant to spend the rest of our lives together because I can't imagine spending one more day without you. So with that said," he reached into his coat pocket. "Will you please marry me?"

He could tell how apprehensive she was and he really wasn't sure how much of what he had just said she had actually heard. The look on her face was pure panic and he honestly couldn't blame her. He had said some things that never should have been said and then he never went after her. She had a right to be heartbroken and confused when he showed up, out of the blue, with an engagement ring.

"Brooke," He said softly, ignoring the glances from all of her friends at the table as he rose to his feet. "Before you say that we've only known each other for five months and that this is too soon and before you think of a million reasons why this won't work, I'm going to give you one why it will. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life by your side as your husband. I want to have children with you and raise—"

"Yes." She said softly as she nodded her head.

"What?"

She smiled up at him. "I want to marry you, Julian."

"You do?"

"She does!" Olivia squealed as she began to jump around. "She said yes, daddy! She said yes!"

He fumbled as he opened up the box and slid the diamond ring on her finger. Julian picked her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist as she buried her face in his neck. "I'm never letting go." He whispered in her hair.

"Neither am I." She replied.

x-x-x

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	20. Filet Mignon

Chapter Twenty: Filet Mignon

She couldn't stop staring at the diamond ring he had slipped on her finger the night before. He was sleeping beside her as she looked at her left hand. The ring was huge, bigger than she ever could have imagined, yet somehow it was still tasteful. She still couldn't shake the feeling that she was an imposter, a girl like her wasn't supposed to have a ring like that. Hers was supposed to be small, simple and understated. Haley and Peyton had marveled over the ring shortly after Julian had proposed but ever since it had been slipped on her finger she felt like it didn't belong.

She sighed softly as she looked at his sleeping form beside her for the first time that morning. He had sold his share of the production company he and his father had founded. How could he do something like that so suddenly? Had he even thought it through? Lying in bed beside him became too much as she carefully slid out making sure she didn't wake him in the process.

The sun was about to rise as she took her steaming cup of coffee out to the back porch. Today should have been one of the happiest days of her life, so for the life of her she couldn't understand why she felt so confused.

"What are you doing up so early?"

At the sound of his voice she turned to see Nathan stepping onto the porch with a cup of coffee steaming in his hand. "I could ask you the same question." She replied as she turned her attention to rising sun.

Nathan slid into the Adirondack chair beside Brooke. "I come out here every morning and watch the sunrise. It's my time to think."

She nodded. "It's really peaceful."

He noticed her staring at the giant ring on her finger with a confused look on her face. "He has good taste." Nathan offered.

Brooke looked at him. "You think so?"

"You don't like it?"

She hesitated before answering. "I do."

"But…?" Nathan prodded.

"But it's not Owen's ring."

There it was. Nathan had been waiting for it from the second Julian slid the ring around her finger the previous night. He could see how in love Brooke was with Julian but he also knew how hard it must have been for her to see Julian down on one knee proposing when for the previous seven years of her life she had envisioned Owen. "I don't know how you got through losing Owen because if I ever lost Haley I couldn't be as strong as you were, it would damn near kill me as well but somehow you were able to move beyond what happened and start a new life with a guy who loves you more than life itself." Nathan smiled to himself when he saw a small smile appear on Brooke's face. "I know that I haven't always been the biggest fan of Julian but that's because I don't like to see you hurting and to know that he's caused it absolutely wrecks me. Last night when he showed up I wanted to give him a piece of my mind, I wanted to punch him square in the face to make him feel a little of the hurt he caused you but Haley stopped me and I'm glad she did. In the moments leading up to his proposal I saw how much he cared about you in the way that he held you and the way that he brushed your hair behind you ear. I can see how much he loves you, Brooke so don't ever question that he does."

She nodded. "I know he does."

"Then what's got you so sad? You should be beaming right now."

"I don't know, Nate." She shrugged. "I am so happy and so in love with Julian but there's still a part of me that feels like I'm betraying Owen somehow; first with the restaurant and now with becoming engaged to Julian."

"He's not coming back Brooke." Nathan said as he placed his coffee mug down. "You're not cheating on him, you're not deceiving him, you're moving on with your life which is exactly what Owen would have wanted you to do. There is absolutely nothing for you to feel guilty about and I know that can be hard to accept but it's the truth. It's okay for you to be happy." He patted her knee gently. "I think you need to talk to Julian though, tell him what's going on in that head of yours."

-x-x-x-

Of all the places in Tree Hill that she could have gone, her feet led her to the one place she never wanted to see again. She had planned to go for a run to clear her head but in the process of changing she had woken Julian up and he had invited himself to join her. They hadn't talked much but Julian figured it was because they were running and it was too difficult to keep up a conversation.

He was confused as she stood in front of an empty lot with her hands on her hips, panting for air. "What are you doing?" He asked. "Nathan and Haley's place is only a little further, don't stop now."

"This was where our house was." Brooke replied.

It took a moment for him to realize what she meant and suddenly it hit him like a ton of bricks. What was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to act? What was he supposed to do? He watched her for little bit, the way she squinted into the sun as she looked at where her house used to stand, the way she licked her lips as if she could still taste the smoke from that night. Slowly, he neared her and snaked his arm around her waist but she took him by surprise when she melted into his touch. She turned her back to the empty lot, rested her head on his chest and breathed in the scent of him. "I love you." Her voice was small and barely audible but he heard her loud and clear. She hadn't said anything but he knew how badly she was struggling with the engagement based on her demeanor ever since he had proposed.

Her love was never something he doubted, he knew that she loved him with all her being but there was another man in her life that she also loved. He knew it was a different kind of love and that it would be unfair to compare the two which was why he wasn't jealous. He still loved Kate but it was a different love than the love he felt for Brooke and he figured it was the same love she still harbored for Owen.

He felt her pull away and watched as she sat down in the grass. She patted the spot beside her making Julian follow suit. "You must hate me." She said as she plucked a piece of grass from the yard.

He grinned as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. "I could never hate you, Brooke."

"I know you must be hurt because I haven't been all giddy about the engagement."

"I know you're struggling with it." He said into her hair.

"You do?" She questioned. "How?"

"I know you. I know what you're going to say before you open your mouth. I know not to bother you when you're talking to yourself in the kitchen. I know that when you dress in sweats, don't put on make-up and toss your hair into a sloppy pony it's not because you're lazy but because you're about to be extremely productive. And I know that this can't be easy for you because for the past seven years the only person you saw a future with was Owen."

She looked at her ring. "Until you walked into my life."

"What?"

"From the moment I met you I knew you were someone special, someone I couldn't let get away. It may have taken a little bit of time for me to realize just how much you meant to me and how much I needed you in my life but I knew that you the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with."

"Then why are you having such a hard time accepting the engagement?"

"I have to say goodbye. I have to turn my back on my past for good and that scares me. Will I be a good enough wife for you? Will I be a good enough mother for Olivia? Will I—"

"Stop." He begged as he cupped her face in his hand. "Where is all of this coming from? You never doubted yourself before."

She nodded. "I just never showed it."

"Brooke, I wouldn't have asked you to marry me if I didn't think you'd make me the happiest man in the world. I wouldn't have flown across the country if I didn't believe you would make a great wife. I wouldn't have suggested we become a family if I didn't think you'd make a wonderful mother. I believe in you and I believe in us."

She leaned in to kiss him but as she pulled away Julian could still sense her apprehension. "What are you thinking about?" He asked.

"Promise me that we will be together for the rest of our lives. I only want to get married once and I don't want to have to ever feel like I have for the past few days without you. Promise me that you'll never leave no matter how bad a fight might get and that—"

"I'm not going anywhere, Brooke." He smiled as he pulled her closer.

x-x-x

Brooke had offered to make dinner but needed to run to the grocery store to get a few things. Julian had offered to go with her but she had insisted he stay and get to know Nathan and Haley instead.

Julian enjoyed talking to Haley, she put him at ease, but the entire time he was talking to her he could feel Nathan staring at him and he knew it was only a matter of time before Nathan would let into him for what he had done to Brooke.

"You know Brooke is more than just a friend to me, she's a sister." Nathan said as he placed his beer down on the counter. "I was always the one who protected her and if someone broke her heart, I broke the guy's face. That was in high school but I'm not past doing that now if you ever hurt her again."

Julian nodded and began to feel uncomfortable. He looked to Haley who had an amused smirk on her face.

"I trust Brooke's judgment and I think you are a good guy I just don't want to see her hurt again because of something you said or did. I can't protect her anymore, I can't watch out for her and be there when she needs help or a shoulder to cry on. I trust you to do that, to take care of her and to be there when she needs you." Nathan took a swig of his beer before holding out his hand for Julian to shake. "No hard feelings." He smiled as Julian's hand came into contact with his. "Welcome to the family."

x-x-x

She had one last stop to make on her way home from the grocery store. This was why she didn't want Julian to come with her; she needed to do this on her own.

It felt like years since the last time she had been to the cemetery when in reality it had only been six months. As she walked toward Owen's grave, she felt a wave of calmness wash over her and she smiled into the sunlight.

When she got to his grave she remained silent for a bit. Following his death, she had visited the cemetery everyday and she never said anything aloud. There were always a million things running through her head whenever she would come but talking to a gravestone was something she couldn't bring herself to do because that reinforced the fact that he was gone and never coming back. She would never hear his laugh again. She would never see him smile. She would never hear his voice again. She would never feel his lips on hers. Today was different though, today she wasn't afraid of the silence she would be met with when she was finished talking.

"I know I haven't been here for a long time but I needed to get away. Everything here reminded me of you and our life together and it became too much. I think that if the roles had been reversed you would have done the same thing." She dug her hands into her jacket pockets and sat down so she was facing the gravestone. "Remember the conversation we had one night about if one of us died the other promised not to stop living and find someone we could share our life with? Well that was a lot easier said than done. I know you're not coming back but I still feel like I'm deceiving you, Owen, and I know that all you want is for me to be happy." She paused for a moment before continuing. "I'm engaged and I struggled with it for a little bit but then I remembered that night and the promise we made to each other. We spent seven amazing years together and I think I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that we weren't meant to spend the rest of our lives together." She smiled sadly. "I've been thinking about us for the past couple days ever since I got back to Tree Hill. We were meant to be together because you made me believe in love again after what Lucas and Peyton did to me and I needed you for that so I could teach Julian how to believe in love after Kate left him." She felt her throat tighten and she knew the tears were only a few blinks away from spilling out of her eyes. "I will always love you, Owen. I will always wonder what our life would be like had we taken care of the windows first. I will always look back on our time together and smile because they were the best seven years of my life but it's time for me to move on. It's not fair to Julian if I'm stuck in the past on the love you and I had, but know this: not a day goes by where I don't think of you." As she traced the letters of his name tears rolled down her cheeks. "I hope that wherever you are you are as happy as I am…you deserve it." She rose to her feet, wiped her eyes and dug her hand deep into her pocket one last time. She pulled out the black velvet ring box, her only keepsake of his, and gently placed it beside his headstone. "You might need this where you are." She said as a small smile appeared on her face.

x-x-x

"Momma!" Olivia squealed when Brooke walked through the front door with a bag of groceries.

Brooke couldn't help the grin that spread across her face. She placed the bag on the floor before lifting Olivia into her arms. "Hi baby girl. Did you miss me?"

Olivia nodded. "Where did you go?"

"I needed to run to the grocery store to get some things for dinner." Brooke couldn't help but notice the look of panic in Olivia's eyes and then it hit her. "Did you think I left for good?"

The little girl nodded sheepishly.

"Olivia, I will never leave you—"

"You said that before but you left anyway."

"I know but you weren't the reason why I left. Your dad and I got really mad at each other and I just needed some time away to figure things out. I was going to come back because I couldn't stand being away from you."

Her eyes lit up. "Really?"

"Really." Brooke smiled. "Do you see this pretty ring your dad gave me?" She asked. "This symbolizes a promise between daddy and me that says neither of us are ever going to leave. Your dad asked me to be his wife and your mother…we get to be a family."

"I thought already are?"

Brooke smiled. "We are."

x-x-x

She had made filet mignon for dinner and everyone had raved over it. Julian had boasted to Nathan and Haley about the restaurant Brooke was in the process of opening which had caused her to blush uncontrollably. While the girls offered to clear the table and dish up dessert, Nathan and Julian sat at the table and got to know each other better and Olivia and Jamie giggled at the other end of the table at each other's knock-knock jokes.

"A restaurant Brooke?" Haley exclaimed once they were in the kitchen. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I don't know. I guess I thought nothing was really going to come of it."

"Brooke," Haley scoffed. "Of course something is going to come of it. It's going to be featured in all the food and wine magazines as one of the go-to places because you are an incredible cook." As she spoke she noticed Brooke's sudden change of demeanor. "What's on your mind?"

"I've been thinking a lot about LA and my life out there with Julian and Olivia. I love it, I love the house we live in, I love the weather and so many other things."

"But…?" Haley pressed.

"But it's not home." She replied. "Being here this past week, seeing you and Nathan and the kids and Lucas and Peyton made me realize how much I miss living here. I left because I couldn't handle the memories I shared here with Owen but now when I look back I can smile."

Haley tried to suppress the grin that was trying to spread across her face. "What are you saying?"

"I think I might talk to Julian about moving back here. I mean, he sold his share in the production company so there's nothing holding him back from moving and I have nothing tying me to LA—"

"Except the restaurant." Haley said.

x-x-x

She lay in bed, wrapped in his arms, drawing lazy circles on his chest. She had gone from feeling guilty and confused and conflicted to feeling happy, content and comfortable in twelve hours and she couldn't have felt more at peace in his embrace.

The ring, she decided, was just right. It did belong on her finger and she wasn't an imposter. This was the man she was supposed to spend the rest of her life with all along and as she looked up at him she couldn't help but feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

x-x-x

I haven't decided yet if Brooke, Julian and Olivia will move to Tree Hill or stay in Los Angeles…what do you want to happen? Let me know.

Review please!


	21. Beer and Peanuts

Chapter Twenty-One: Beer and Peanuts

Brooke and Julian had been in Tree Hill for a week. Olivia had become best friends with Jamie and Abby. Julian had grown incredibly close to Lucas and Nathan. Haley, Brooke and Peyton had picked up right where they had left off before Brooke went to Los Angeles but Brooke knew how hard it was going to be to leave which was why she was putting off the conversation. Whenever someone would ask when she was leaving, Brooke would change the subject.

The warmth of the sunlight woke her and she smiled at Julian when she realized he had her wrapped in his arms. "How long have you been up?" She asked her voice thick with sleep.

"Just a little bit," He replied. "I've been thinking though."

"About what?"

"What if we got married here?"

Brooke's face lit up. "Really?" She asked. "You would want to do that?"

Julian nodded.

"I've never been that girl who had her wedding planned out since she was a little girl so I'm going to need Peyton and Haley's help. When? I've always wanted a fall wedding although a spring one wouldn't be bad either—"

"Brooke," Julian interrupted.

She blushed. "I'm sorry. I know I'm rambling but I'm just so excited." She couldn't help the huge smile that had spread across her face.

"Brooke," He said again making sure he had her attention. "I was thinking that we could get married on Saturday."

"_This_ Saturday?"

He nodded.

"That's three days away, Julian." She began to panic. "I don't have a dress, you don't have a tux, we don't have a wedding party—"

"We'll figure it out." He smiled as he leaned in to kiss her. "I want to be your husband."

She deepened the kiss. "I can't wait to be your wife."

x-x-x

"Well," Brooke sighed. "What do you think?"

It was the fourth wedding dress she had tried on that morning and none of them had impressed any of them.

Haley and Peyton were trying to be as upbeat as possible since Brooke was panicking about finding a wedding dress in three days.

"It's…nice." Peyton offered.

"Nice?" Brooke repeated. "I don't want a 'nice' wedding dress—"

Haley could tell Brooke was about to start panicking for the umpteenth time that morning so she stepped in. "We're going to find you a dress. There are hundreds of dresses here and one of them is the dress you are meant to get married in. Trust me; everything is going to work out."

Brooke nodded after taking a deep breath. "Thanks. I needed that."

"I know." Haley smiled as she rubbed her friend's arm.

Brooke stepped down off the pedestal in front of the mirror and walked toward Peyton and Haley. "This is crazy, though, right? To plan an entire wedding in three days?"

Haley and Peyton exchanged glances before laughing. "He's insane, Brooke." Peyton stated. "But a good insane, this just shows how much he loves you."

Brooke looked to her right to see Olivia spinning in circles in front of a mirror wearing the flower girl dress she had picked out moments after entering the store. In that moment she didn't care if she found the perfect dress or if they didn't have a venue yet…all that mattered was that she, Julian and Olivia were finally going to be a family.

Nine dresses later, Brooke emerged from the dressing room and Haley, Peyton and Olivia's jaws dropped when they saw her. "You look stunning." Haley said as she rose to her feet.

"I think this is the one." Brooke smiled as she looked at herself in the mirror.

Olivia ran over and wrapped her arms around Brooke's legs. "You look like a princess!" She squealed.

Haley and Peyton joined them in front of the mirror as Brooke continued to nervously run her hands down the dress. "I'm getting married." She whispered to herself. "I'm really getting married."

Peyton watched as a grin spread across Brooke's face. This was her moment. Her life had become a fairytale and it was finally her turn to get the happily ever after because she, more than anyone, deserved it.

x-x-x

"Are you nervous?" Lucas asked as he buttoned his dress shirt.

Julian shook his head. "I'm really calm, actually."

"That's good." Nathan said as he emerged from the dressing room in his tux. "So are you guys going back to Los Angeles after the wedding?"

Julian shrugged. "I'm not sure."

Nathan and Lucas exchanged glances. "You're thinking about staying?" Lucas asked with wide eyes.

"I can see how happy she is here." He offered. "I don't want to take her away from here unless she wants to go back to LA." Julian straightened his bowtie. "And besides, this is a pretty great place to raise a family."

Nathan grinned. "It is and it'd be awesome to have you and Brooke living right down the street."

"What about her restaurant?" Lucas asked.

"It's up to her but if she wants to move back here I'll buy another space and she can still have her dream. I just want her to be happy."

Nathan and Lucas joined Julian in front of the mirror and Nathan cupped his hand on Julian's shoulder. "She's the happiest I have seen her in a long time," He said. "And that's all because of you and Olivia."

x-x-x

"Are you nervous?" Peyton asked.

"More like petrified." Brooke replied before taking a sip of her wine.

They were sitting on the edge of the pool with their feet in the water, relaxing after a stressful morning of trying to find a wedding dress and matron of honor dresses but it was all worth it. Brooke couldn't have been happier with the dresses the three of them had picked and she couldn't wait to walk down the aisle in only a matter of days.

"I can't believe you held out this long." Haley shook her head. "Don't you feel like you've been missing out?"

"Sometimes." Brooke shrugged. "But sex to me is something that is only supposed to be shared with one man, the one I'm going to spend the rest of my life with."

"Have you guys talked about it?" Haley inquired.

"He knows I'm a virgin." She offered. "And I know he isn't. He has slept with so many girls…how am I supposed to live up to that?"

Peyton wrapped her arm around Brooke's shoulders. "Julian loves you and he knows that you are going to be scared and nervous but he's not going anywhere." She said softly. "He'll make you feel comfortable and you don't need to know how to do anything because you'll just feel it and your emotions will take over your body."

Haley nodded. "He's not marrying you for the sex, Brooke."

"I know." She replied. "And not once has he pressured me or made me feel uncomfortable but all we've done is snuggling in bed together. I haven't taken off my clothes in front of him. The only time he's seen my body and the scars was the day he walked in when I was changing. He didn't see it up close so what happens if on Saturday night he's so turned off by it that he—"

"He's not going to be." Peyton said softly. "He loves you because of what's on the in—"

"Stop." Brooke begged. "That's all everyone says, that a man will love me because of what's on the inside, the scars and burn marks don't matter, he'll look past that, blah blah blah." She suddenly lifted up her shirt to reveal her scarred body, something Haley and Peyton had never seen since Brooke was so self-conscious of it. "My skin feels like a reptile. How is he supposed to look past that when all you two have ever told me is that sex is all about feeling? That all your senses are heightened? How am I supposed to feel pretty when I look like this? This is what over half of my body looks like, it's not just a little scar we're talking about. The girls he's slept with are models and actresses with perfect hair and flawless skin. How do I live up to that?"

"You don't." Haley answered honestly. "Julian is marrying _you_. He could have married any one of them but he didn't because he didn't love them like he loves you. I know you're scared and self-conscious but Julian loves you just the way you are and I promise he won't run away when you show him your body up close come Saturday night. He loves you, Brooke." She said softly as she hugged her friend.

x-x-x

"You know Brooke is a virgin, right?" Lucas asked as they sat at a bar.

Julian almost spit his beer out. "Yes. How do you?"

"Peyton and Haley aren't the quietest talkers." He shrugged. "So how are you planning on handling Saturday night?"

Nathan shifted uncomfortably on his barstool. He had always felt like Brooke was his sister and listening to Julian and Lucas discuss her sex life wasn't something he wanted to hear so he turned his attention to the baseball game on one of the television screens and tried his best to tune the two of them out.

Julian shrugged. "I haven't really thought about it."

Lucas placed his beer on the cardboard coaster. "I heard that you were quite promiscuous before Brooke came into your life."

Julian shamefully nodded.

"That's all that's going to be on Brooke's mind; that she's not as good as them, that you're comparing her to them and so on. You need to make her feel safe, comfortable and most importantly loved because otherwise she is going to panic."

"I can do that." Julian replied before taking a swig of his beer and tossing a handful of peanuts into his mouth. He hoped Lucas and Nathan couldn't sense his nerves because truth be told his stomach was already in knots when he thought about Saturday night.

x-x-x

He walked into the guest bedroom at Nathan and Haley's to find his fiancée and daughter sleeping. Caught off guard, he paused in the doorway and marveled at the sight before him. How had he gotten so lucky? Olivia being left in the park that one Tuesday morning was possibly the best thing that had ever happened because if it wasn't for that he wouldn't be the man he is now.

He carefully sat down on the edge of the bed and brushed her dark hair away from her face. "Brooke," He whispered.

Within seconds her eyes fluttered open and a smile spread across her lips when she saw him. "Hi you," She greeted. "Did you have fun today?"

He nodded. "Did you find a dress?"

Brooke's face lit up. "I can't wait for you to see it."

"Me either." He smiled as he leaned into kiss her. "Come with me."

Brooke slid out of the bed, careful not to wake Olivia, and took Julian's hand. "Where are we going?" She asked as he led her out of the house.

As they walked hand in hand Julian couldn't feel more confident. "I did something today and I'm not sure how you're going to react when I tell you." He started.

"Julian—"

"Let me finish." He begged as he stopped walking and stood in front of her with his hands on her shoulders. "I want to have children with you. I want those children to be safe and surrounded by people who love them. I want you to be happy. I don't want to take you away from here, Brooke."

"Wh-what are you saying?" She stuttered thinking it was too good to be true.

"I want to stay in Tree Hill. I want to raise a family here. I want to hang out with Nathan and Lucas on a random Wednesday afternoon. I want to—"

She cut him off by pressing her lips against his. "I want all of that too." She smiled.

He grinned. "I also still want you to have your dream."

"This is all I want." She said as she shook her head. "Nothing else matters."

"Turn around." He insisted.

Brooke did as she was told and turned to see a vacant storefront. "You bought me another restaurant?"

"I sold the other one about an hour ago." He said as he glanced at his watch.

She couldn't help but laugh. "What if I said I didn't want to stay here?"

"I didn't think you would." He shrugged. "This is your dream, Brooke, and it's within walking distance from the house and—"

"You bought a house?"

"Well, there isn't a house yet but there will be in a few months."

Brooke cocked her eyebrow.

"The empty lot across the street from Nathan and Haley is ours." He smirked.

"You really want to live here, don't you?" She laughed.

Julian nodded. "I sold my share of the company so there is nothing for me in Los Angeles. In the week that I've been here I've realized how important it is to have family and friends by your side and I don't have that in California. I've seen how happy you are and I don't want to take that away by moving us back to LA."

She closed the gap between them and wrapped her arms around his waist. "You're not going to resent me in a couple years when you get sick of living here, right? Because if you are then we can go back to California, I don't want you to be unhappy—"

"That's not possible." He whispered as he leaned his forehead against hers. "As long as I have you and Olivia to come home to I will be the happiest man in the world."

x-x-x

"You're parents are flying in tomorrow, right?" Brooke asked as they lay in bed.

Julian nodded. "They're staying at the hotel though because I don't want to impose on Nathan and Haley."

Brooke remained silent for a little bit, Julian had thought she had fallen asleep so he was surprised when he heard her voice.

"We still don't have a venue for the wedding—"

He squeezed her against his body. "We'll find something."

"What if we had a beach wedding?" She asked. "I want my parents to be there…" She trailed off afraid of how he would respond.

He kissed the top of her head and squeezed her against his body. She knew his answer without him speaking a word and a small smile spread across her face.

He knew Saturday was going to be hard for her. Her parents were supposed to be there. Her mother was supposed to help her get dressed in her wedding gown. Her father was supposed to walk her down the aisle. A storm had stolen that from her. Brooke wouldn't get to see her mother crying happy tears as she said her vows. She wouldn't get to dance with her father at the reception. He knew this was the first of many moments her parents wouldn't be there for. Brooke's pregnancy. The birth of their first child. The opening of the restaurant. He felt foolish for taking his parents for granted, for not appreciating them as much as he should. As he lay with her sleeping in his arms all he wanted was to give her her parents back. They were taken way too soon but they had done an impeccable job raising her in the thirteen years they were a part of her life.

As he dozed off he couldn't help but want Saturday to come as fast as it possibly could. He couldn't wait a second longer to become her husband. He couldn't wait to call her his wife. He'd waited his entire life for a woman like her to walk into his life so as she slept in his arms he couldn't help but feel like the luckiest man in the world.

x-x-x

Review please!


	22. Wedding Cake

Chapter Twenty-Two: Wedding Cake

The day he had been waiting for since the moment he stumbled into his kitchen to find her cooking up a storm had finally arrived. The sun woke him up and he couldn't help the grin that immediately spread across his face. He was getting married. Today. To Brooke. His smile broadened.

He practically jumped out of bed due to the amount of excitement coursing through his veins. As he headed into the bathroom he heard a soft knock at the door.

"Hi." She said when he opened the door.

He immediately pulled her into the safe confines of his room. Haley had insisted that he and Brooke spend the night before their wedding in separate rooms since it was bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding. Brooke and Julian didn't believe in that but they didn't really have a choice since Haley was adamant about it.

He kissed her. "Good morning," He said. "Does Haley know you're here?"

She shook her head.

Her demeanor was in stark contrast to his own he noticed. She seemed nervous, anxious and dare he say scared? "Are you okay?" He asked as he led her toward the bed and they both sat down.

"I can't stop thinking about tonight." She replied. "I try to keep my mind from going there but no matter what I do I can't. I'm just –I'm scared."

He ran his thumb along her jaw-line. "I am too." He confided.

At this her head shot up. "You are?"

Julian nodded. "I never loved the girls I slept with in my past. I love you more than you will ever know, Brooke, so I know tonight will be different from all the rest and that scares me."

She hesitated for a moment before looking at him. She slowly rose to her feet and the last thing he expected was for her to take off her shirt. Her pants dropped to the floor and she stood before him in just her bra and underwear. He could see her physically shaking. He could see the tears that she was trying to keep at bay. "This is me." Her voice cracked as the tears she tried so hard to keep from falling spilled from her eyes.

He immediately rose to his feet and enveloped his arms. He held her tight in his embrace and gently swayed back and forth in an effort tot calm her. She had never been this vulnerable around him, it was a side of herself she preferred not to show but he found breathtaking. "I love you." He said softly into her hair.

"I wanted you to know what you were getting yourself into. I didn't want you to run scared tonight when you saw me."

"I would never run away from you. You're scars make you even more beautiful." He told her. "Where is this coming from, though?"

"A few weeks before I met you I met a guy at a bar and I was a little drunk. I don't usually take guys home but for whatever reason I took him back to my place and we were making out on the couch when he slipped his hand up my shirt. He jumped back and started freaking out. He said I felt like an alligator and no man would ever want to sleep with a reptile let alone fall in love with one…" Her voice trailed off as she rested her head against his chest.

His mind was racing. Who was that guy? Who the hell did he think he was? Why did he have the right to say those awful things to her? Julian wanted, more than anything, to find that guy and beat the living daylights out of him. "I'm not going anywhere," He assured her. "And he was wrong, Brooke. Your skin may be flawed but it's beautiful and if he couldn't see that then that's his problem, not yours."

She had never felt safer than in that moment, wrapped in his arms. The way he rubbed her back and the way he squeezed her tighter against his body every so often. He was her knight in shining armor. She was living a fairytale and today was the first day of her happily ever after with the man of her dreams.

x-x-x

"I never thought this day would come." Olivia said as she watched Brooke apply her make-up.

"What do you mean?" Brooke asked as she turned to face her.

"When daddy yelled at you and you left I thought I was never going to see you again. But then I remembered who you were and daddy and I got on a plane and came here to get you back. That was the best day of my whole entire life."

"How come?"

"Because that day I knew we were going to be a family. It's always been just me and my dad and that's just the way it was. I always wanted a mom but didn't think I needed one." Olivia shrugged. "You changed my mind. I need you. I need my mom."

It was times like these that Brooke couldn't believe that Olivia was only five years old. She rose to her feet and retrieved an envelope from the top drawer of the dresser before sitting next to Olivia on the bed. "I couldn't be happier or more proud to be your mother." She smiled. "And look at this," She pulled the contents out of the envelope.

"What is it?" Olivia asked.

"This," Brooke pointed. "Legally makes me your mom."

Olivia's eyes widened. "Really?"

She nodded.

Olivia wrapped her arms around Brooke's neck. "You know what the best part is?" She whispered into Brooke's ear. "Kids are born to their parents without a choice but you picked me."

Brooke hugged the little girl tight against her body. "I did." She said. "I picked you."

Just then, Haley and Peyton entered the room with Brooke's dress. "Look what we have!" Haley sang.

Brooke helped Olivia get into her dress as Peyton and Haley helped each other. Brooke eyed her dress which was hanging on the back of the door and she couldn't help the smile that spread across her lips. She was getting married to the man she couldn't imagine her life without. He made her feel safe and content. He challenged her. He was the father she always knew he was capable of being and so glad he had become.

Olivia zipped up the back of Brooke's dress with the help of Peyton while Haley adjusted her hair. "You look gorgeous." Haley said as they looked in the mirror.

"So do you guys." Brooke replied as she looked at their emerald dresses.

Before they could respond there was a knock at the door and seconds later Paul appeared. "Hi ladies," He greeted. "Do you think I could have a moment with Brooke?"

Haley and Peyton led Olivia out of the room leaving Brooke alone with Paul.

"You look beautiful." He whispered in her ear as he held her in his embrace.

She blushed. "Thank you."

Paul gestured to the bed and they both sat down. "I never thought this day would come until I met you, Brooke." He said as he patted her knee. "The moment you walked into my son's life everything changed within him. He didn't believe in love anymore but you changed that. He didn't know how to parent Olivia but you changed that. He didn't know that family should matter more than work but you changed that." He paused for a moment as he gazed out the window. "For the past five years my son has been so lost and there were times I thought he would never recover from what Kate did to him but then he met you. By chance, you waltzed into his life and changed everything without even up to him, and day by day I could see the walls he had spent five long years building up starting to break down. I saw my son with a smile on his face, I heard his laugh, something I wasn't sure I'd ever hear again and you can only imagine how that made me feel." A single tear escaped his eye and Brooke could tell he was starting to get choked up. He wrapped his arm around her and she rested her head on his shoulder. "Thank you for loving my son."

"He makes it easy." She replied.

x-x-x

Julian could hear his daughter giggling as she made her way down the spiral staircase with Haley and Peyton. She came into view a few seconds later and he smiled when he saw her all dressed up in her dress.

"Daddy!" She exclaimed when she saw him. "Wait until you see her! She looks like a princess!"

Julian scooped his daughter up into his arms which caused her to erupt in another fit of giggles. "So do you." He told her.

"It's not just going to be you and me anymore." She said as she played with his tie.

Julian cocked his head to the side. "Are you upset about that?"

"No." She said firmly. "It's always felt like something was missing but now it doesn't because we have mommy."

Julian grinned. "We found our missing piece."

Olivia kissed her father and then wiggled out of his arms. Peyton offered her hand to the little girl and they made their way toward the beach since the ceremony was to start soon.

"You're beaming." Haley observed as she moved closer to Julian.

He shrugged. "I can't help it. I can't wait for her to walk down that aisle and become my wife."

"She's my best friend," Haley started. "And to watch what she had to go through when Owen died and know that nothing I said or did could make her pain go away was excruciating. She turned into a different person after he died; someone I didn't recognize and feared had replaced the Brooke Davis I once knew for good. When she left, I was lost. I didn't know what to do with myself, I didn't know if she was okay, I didn't know if I should reach out to her or let her come back to me on her own. When I saw her that time Peyton and I flew out there something was different. Her smile said it all, it was real and genuine for the first time since the fire. She was her old self again, the girl I knew before the fire and that's all because of you." She smiled. "I hear everyone say that Brooke changed you, that you're the man you are today because of her but you have had a huge impact on who Brooke is. You made her believe in love again. You made her feel like one in a million. You made her believe that it's okay to be happy despite what happened in the past. When I look at her now I see someone who is strong, beautiful and loved. I trust you to take care of her, I know you're never going to hurt her and I know that your love for her is only going to grow with each day that passes."

Julian didn't know what to say so he did the only thing he could think of; he pulled Haley into hug. "Thank you for bringing my best friend back." She told him.

x-x-x

The wedding was incredibly simple. It was just her closest friends and his parents standing on the beach witnessing the two of them pledge their love for the other. They didn't need big and fancy. They didn't need over the top. They just needed each other because that was all that truly mattered.

He stood at the water's edge with Nathan, Lucas, Haley, Peyton and his parents as they waited for Brooke to make her way toward them. Olivia practically skipped down the aisle, tossing petals from her basket, as she made her way toward her father.

Julian saw a flash of white emerge from Nathan and Haley's house. He watched as she closed the sliding glass door before she made her way down the back porch steps and toward the beach. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. Her dark hair was pulled into a simple ponytail that rested at the nape of her neck while her curls spilled over her left shoulder. The ocean breeze got caught up in her dress and made her look ethereal. The dress she had picked out was just as simple and beautiful as Brooke herself, Julian thought. It was a strapless white chiffon dress with a sweetheart neckline that fluttered in the breeze with each step she took.

They both smiled at each other as Brooke took her place beside Julian. Neither of them said a word to each other, they didn't have to, the way they gazed at the other spoke volumes on its own. The minister smiled at the couple before he began. "No one knows why we fall in love but we do. It's the most basic human emotion. Everyone wants it; everyone wants to feel it coarse through his or her veins. They want to feel…" both Brooke and Julian were no longer paying attention to what he was saying; instead they were focused on each other. It was their wedding day.

"I don't know how I thought my life was complete before you appeared because now I realize that I was missing something, a huge something, my other half." Julian said as he began to recite the vows he had written. "Love is a funny thing for me because I don't think I ever experienced it before I met you, I never had a clear understanding as to what love was but you changed all that. You changed my life for the better and I am eternally grateful, you taught me how to love someone else but also how to love myself. I used to be afraid of falling in love, of giving my heart away. How could I trust a woman to love me, to give to me all that I wanted to give to her? I was terrified to open my heart up to someone because I didn't want it handed back in a million little pieces but with you it was different. You showed me how big your heart was when you instantly fell into the role of mother for Olivia. She loves you more than life itself; and as her father I couldn't be more grateful for the amount of love you have for her. This is all I've ever wanted but I never thought I deserved. You changed that. You changed me." He smiled as he slid her diamond wedding band over her finger.

Brooke took a deep breath before she began. "I never thought I'd be able to love again, that I would _want_ to love again. I thought my once in a lifetime love had come and gone and I was left to pick up the pieces on my own. Then I met you. You showed me that I wasn't alone and you helped me put my life back together whether you realize it or not. You made me believe in the power of love again and _this_ is the love and life I was meant for, everything that has happened in the past happened so I could be here with you where I belong." She paused briefly before continuing. "I know that I can be myself around you and that you won't judge me for something I'm not. I realized one night that so many people focus on other's imperfections but then it dawned on me that you love me _for_ my imperfections. You're the person I can laugh with and cry with, who I can share everything with, whom I consider my best friend." She paused again but this time glanced at Olivia before continuing. "It's not just you I had to think about when it came to us, there was a child involved, a child I love more than anything in this world. Although she may not look like me and although she may not biologically be mine, she will always be my daughter. By marrying you today we become an instant family that will last until the end of time. Julian, there is so much I want to share with you as my husband and starting right now we can embark on that journey together." She finished as she slid his wedding band onto his finger.

Julian at long last heard the minister say the words he had been waiting a long time to hear. He leaned in and kissed Brooke and his parents as well as her friends erupted in cheers.

The small group of them made their way back to Nathan and Haley's house where they simply enjoyed each other's company. They enjoyed tuna steaks cooked on the grill before devouring the wedding cake Brooke had somehow found time to create.

As Brooke looked around the room at everyone smiling and laughing and she felt content, like this was exactly the way her wedding day was supposed to be. She felt Julian wrap his arm around her waist from behind and she leaned into his touch. They gently swayed to the music that was playing from the stereo and from across the room, everyone they cared about watched as the two of them danced.

x-x-x

The night eventually came to an end. Paul and Diane returned to their hotel. Lucas and Peyton carried a sleeping Abby toward their car and Nathan and Haley tucked Jamie and Olivia into bed before they said goodbye to Brooke and Julian as they headed toward the bed and breakfast downtown that Julian had booked a few days prior.

x-x-x

He checked them in, got the key and whisked her into his arms as he carried her toward their room. He watched her expression as he opened the door.

"Julian," She gasped.

The room had been transformed the room into an elegant oasis. There were white flower petals strewn across the room, candles glowing everywhere and the bed had been turned down. "I wanted it to be special." He said as he laid her down on the bed.

And it was. She let him undress her and touch her; she let him run his hands all over her body. She had never felt more alive than when he began to trail kisses down her body and explore her with his hands. He was nervous that she would panic when he entered her but she didn't. She rocked her body back and forth and within moments they fell in sync with each other and their bodies became one.

As they laid in a tangled mess of sheets in each other's arms after making love for a second time, neither one of them had felt more love or happiness than in that moment.

She was sure she hadn't lived up to the previous women Julian had slept with in his past but she could have cared less. She noticed the smile on his face and the love in his eyes and that was more than enough for her. "I love you." She whispered as she scooted closer to him.

"I love you too." He replied as he kissed the top of her head. He was a married man, something he never thought he would be, and with her as his wife he finally felt complete.

x-x-x

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	23. Toast

Chapter Twenty-Three: Toast

It had been six months since the wedding and life in Tree Hill couldn't be better. They had honeymooned in Spain shortly after the wedding but had brought Olivia with them which served as their first family vacation. When they got home they immediately started working on building the house. The opening of the restaurant was only a few days away. Julian was happier than he had ever been since he didn't work a 9-5 office job anymore; instead he spent his days with Brooke at the restaurant helping her with every aspect. Olivia had taken the move exceptionally well; she had made a plethora of friends and enjoyed the public school system much more than the rigid private school she attended in LA. The house had been completed three weeks earlier and they had finally settled in. The house was even bigger than the one in California they had called home before, if that was even possible. Olivia still hadn't figured out the layout of the new house so she had gotten lost inside quite a few times which Nathan and Haley had found hilarious when Brooke told them. They had also told Brooke that Haley was pregnant with their third child. Peyton was due in the next week or so and none of them could contain their excitement.

The restaurant was supposed to open on Saturday but Brooke had to push the date back since she had been suffering from the flu. Olivia had brought it home from school the week before and Brooke had caught it while nursing her daughter back to health. Somehow, Julian had managed not to.

"We have some toast for you," Julian said as he and Olivia walked in with a plate.

Brooke shook her head. "Everything I eat just comes right back up."

He sat down on the bed and leaned over to feel her forehead. "You need to eat something, Brooke. You haven't eaten anything for a couple days."

"I just feel so sick." She sighed.

"I'm sorry mommy." Olivia said as she patted Brooke's leg through the comforter.

"It's not your fault, bumblebee."

"But I was sick first and you got sick because you were taking care of me." Olivia reasoned. "That makes it my fault."

"You couldn't help getting sick just like I couldn't help it." Brooke told her. "Your dad just happened to luck out this time so next time give him all your yucky germs."

Olivia laughed. "Okay!"

"Thanks," Julian laughed as he rolled his eyes. "Have you gotten sick this morning?"

"No but I still feel really nauseous." She replied.

"Liv, why don't you bring the toast back to the kitchen since mommy doesn't want it right now?" Julian suggested as he handed the plate to his daughter. Once she left the room, he turned to his wife. "Could you be pregnant?"

Her eyes went wide. "Julian—"

"Think about it, you're nauseous and always throwing up—"

"Which are symptoms of the flu." She finished.

"I don't know," Julian hesitated. "I think you might be pregnant."

"I'm not." She assured him.

"Would you be happy if you were?"

"Of course," She replied. "But this isn't really the best time for a baby since the restaurant is days away from opening and the next few months are going to be crazy."

He nodded because he knew she was right. "Maybe you're right, maybe this is just the flu but I'm going to pick up a pregnancy test on my way home from dropping Liv off at school, okay?"

"Okay." She said softly.

x-x-x

He was waiting in line at the drugstore when he heard his name. He turned around to see Peyton waddling toward him, waving excitedly. He quickly stashed the pregnancy test on one of the shelves so she wouldn't see.

"What's up?" She asked him.

"Not too much, just getting Brooke some more medicine."

Peyton looked at his hands to see that they were empty. She eyed him curiously.

"I uh was going to ask the cashier what the pharmacist would recommend." He lied. "How are you? How much longer?"

She smiled as she moved her hand to the top of her belly. "It could be any day now. Abby was almost two weeks early so that's what my doctor thinks will be the case with this one."

"Do you know what you're having?"

Peyton shook her head. "Lucas doesn't want to know." Her eyes suddenly lit up as if she just got an idea. "You and Brooke should really try to get pregnant soon so he or she can have a best friend along with Nathan and Haley's new baby! How awesome would that be if we all had kids that were the same age?"

"Pretty great." Julian grinned.

"Well I should let you get back to Brooke; I hope she feels better soon." Peyton said as she turned to leave.

He nodded. "I'll let her know you're thinking of her." He watched her leave the store before he retrieved the pregnancy test he had stashed minutes earlier.

x-x-x

He was surprised when he returned to the house not to find her lying in their bed. "Brooke?" He called out.

"In here."

He found her in the bathroom, her arms draped around the toilet as she got sick. He put the test down on the counter, kneeled down behind her, gathered her hair and rubbed her back as she continued to get sick. When she was done, she leaned back in his arms and closed her eyes. "I ran into Peyton at the drugstore."

Her eyes shot open. "You didn't tell her anything, right?"

He shook his head. "I hid the test while I talked to her. She's thinking of you and said that the baby could come any day since Abby was so early."

"That's so exciting." Brooke smiled.

He reached for the pregnancy test. "Are you ready?"

She nodded as she took the box from him and with his help rose to her feet. As she opened it, he walked out of the bathroom and closed the door behind him. She emerged a few minutes later to find him pacing in their bedroom. She reached for his hand and they both sat down on the bed to wait.

It was the longest five minutes of their lives.

"Think it's time?" He asked.

Brooke glanced at her phone and nodded. "Ready?"

He squeezed her hand as they stood and made their way to the bathroom where the two tests sat on the vanity. "What does it mean?" He asked as he saw both tests had two pink lines on them.

"I'm pregnant."

He couldn't help the smile that spread across his face. He looked to see her reaction and saw tears spilling from her eyes. "We'll make this work, sweetheart. I know a million different things are running through your head right now but I'm going to be right by your side the entire time. We can do this, I—"

"I'm not upset," She said as a smile grew on her face that rivaled her husband's. "I'm happy. These are happy tears."

He cupped her face between his hands and kissed her. Their tears meshed and neither of them could believe that she was pregnant.

x-x-x

Brooke had called her doctor and she was able to be seen later that morning. She couldn't contain her excitement as she and Julian walked hand in hand toward the office. They sat in the exam room for what seemed like forever until the doctor returned and confirmed that Brooke was indeed pregnant and not suffering from the flu.

"When do we tell people?" She asked as they walked back toward the car.

Julian shrugged. "Whenever you want, I doubt Olivia will be able to keep the secret so if we tell her everyone will know."

"Would you mind if we kept this between you and me for a little bit?" She asked as she looked up at him.

"Not at all." He responded as he squeezed her hand.

When they got home, Brooke felt nauseas so they retreated to their bedroom to lie down for a bit before Olivia got home from school. "Do you think I'll be a good father?" His voice was low and uneven as he held her in his arms.

Brooke knew it had been on his mind from the second they saw the positive pregnancy tests. As happy and excited as he was he was also scared beyond belief because of what happened with Kate. She laced her fingers with his and squeezed tight. "I'm not leaving. We're in this parenting thing together and there are going to be days where we wonder if we're doing it right, if our children are happy, and a whole bunch of other things but the one thing I can assure you we won't question is if we're good parents. Olivia loves you more than anything in this world and this baby is going to be the same way." She said as she placed their interlocked hands on her stomach.

He smiled at her words. "I needed to hear you say that."

"I know," She replied as she ran her fingers through his short hair. "I couldn't be happier, you know."

"Neither could I." His voice was thick and full of sleep. She knew he was exhausted since she had kept him up most of the night while she got sick. As he drifted off to sleep she couldn't stop thinking about the baby that was growing inside of her. Granted, it wasn't the best timing but that didn't matter. She wouldn't be showing for a little while and she could work at the restaurant up until the very end as long as she kept her work to a minimum. A baby wouldn't change anything but it would also change everything. She worried that Olivia would become jealous since the baby would require a lot of her time in the beginning. She didn't want Olivia to resent herself or Julian or feel like the baby was replacing her. Maybe the sooner they told Olivia; the sooner she'd warm up to the idea of having a baby in the house.

x-x-x

Saturday had finally come. Brooke, for the most part, was feeling better and hadn't gotten sick the past couple of days. Olivia was in her room getting ready for the restaurant opening while Brooke and Julian finished getting ready themselves.

"Zip me up?" She asked as she turned around and pulled her hair to the side so it wouldn't get caught in the zipper.

"Wow," Julian said once she turned around. The deep purple dress clung to her body in all the right places.

She looked down and placed both of her hand on her stomach. "You can't tell I'm pregnant, can you?"

"No, you look stunning Brooke." He laughed.

She draped her arms around his neck and leaned in for a kiss. "You look pretty handsome yourself."

Olivia popped her head into their room. "Ready?"

x-x-x

Her anxiety was through the roof. She hadn't expected that many people to show up but the crowd was enormous. Photographers were everywhere, microphones and tape recorders were being shoved in her face from all directions. Julian did his best to protect his wife and daughter from the paparazzi since he knew how they could be. Once they reached safety inside of the restaurant, Brooke breathed a sigh of relief. Nathan, Haley, Lucas and Peyton were all inside mingling with a smaller crowd, the people that mattered most to Brooke.

When Haley saw Brooke and Julian she rushed over and pulled her best friend into a hug. "The place looks great!" She exclaimed. "You must be so happy!"

Brooke smiled. "Thanks, Hales."

The restaurant was different from the first one she had left behind in Los Angeles. This one was more laid back, more family-friendly, more her. It was where she already shared so many incredible memories with her husband since they had spent every waking moment during the past six months there together making it into something special. There was a room in the back where Olivia could do her homework while her parents worked. Julian had become quite good in the kitchen thanks to lessons from Brooke during some of their downtime. She was caught up in what she had created that she didn't realize it was her turn to speak.

She looked at her husband who smiled before she began to speak. "This is something I never thought I'd be able to achieve but with the help of my incredible husband I am able to stand here today and tell you that I can do it. I know there will be days ahead where I question my decision to have my own restaurant, I know not everyday will be sunshine and flowers, but I also know that this is what I was destined for all along. Some of you are probably wondering where the name comes from. _Serendipity _means making a fortunate discovery by accident. I wouldn't have any of this if I had never gone for a walk in the park one sunny Tuesday morning." She gestured around her before smiling at Julian and Olivia. "A scared little girl was sitting on a park bench crying because she had been left behind by her nanny. When the police arrived to take her home, I thought I would never see her again but she called out my name and she wanted me to go with her. Today, that little girl is my daughter and her father is the love of my life. We were brought together serendipitously and I would not change it for the world." She smiled. "So with that being said, Serendipity is open for business!" She cut the red ribbon that was stretched between the door and within moments the entire restaurant was full.

x-x-x

She lay in his arms and listened to him snore with a smile on her face. She knew the next eight months were going to fly by and before she knew it their baby would be born. She couldn't wait to hold their baby in her arms, to rock him or her to sleep at night. She also couldn't wait to see her husband with their child. He doubted himself, she knew that, but she also knew he had nothing to worry about. He had proven not only to her but to himself, in the past year, that he was capable of being an incredible father.

x-x-x

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	24. Blueberry Muffin

Chapter Twenty-Four: Blueberry Muffin

A month had passed and the restaurant had far exceeded her expectations. Business couldn't be better, she and Julian spent time together working while Olivia was in school and then they came home and spent time as a family in the evenings. No one knew about Brooke's pregnancy but they were planning on sharing the news with their friends in a couple weeks. Peyton had delivered a healthy baby boy a few days after running into Julian at the drugstore and Brooke couldn't spend enough time with her nephew.

Julian emerged from the bathroom, still dripping wet from the shower, to find Brooke sitting in bed flipping through a name book and eating a blueberry muffin. "You're already looking at names?" He asked as he ran the towel through his short hair.

She looked up from the book and nodded. "I couldn't wait."

He noticed her wince and watched as she brought her hand to her stomach which was still flat as a board. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

She didn't sound as convincing as she had hoped. Julian was by her side in a matter of seconds. "What hurts?" He asked.

"It's nothing. It was just a shooting pain but it's gone now. I'm fine." She assured him.

He eyed her skeptically but she just smiled at him. "Are you coming to work today?" He asked.

She nodded. "You don't have to wait for me though."

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked as he walked toward the door.

"I'm fine." She assured him as she got out of bed only to collapse to the floor.

"Brooke!" He cried as he rushed toward her.

Her skin was cool to the touch and she was sweating. He knew something was wrong.

"What happened?" She asked as she looked around to find herself in Julian's arms.

"You fainted," He told her trying to stay calm. "Does anything hurt?"

She shook her head. "Everything won't stop spinning." She said as she closed her eyes.

"Brooke, don't close your eyes," He said as he gently touched her face which was colder than before and dripping with sweat. "You're going to be okay."

His parents were at the house in a matter of minutes. Olivia was still asleep and Julian thought it was best if she stay behind. His mother and father barged through the front door, still clad in their pajamas, searching for their son.

"What happened?" Diane asked when she saw Julian with Brooke in his arms.

"I don't know." Julian replied trying his best to keep the tears at bay. "She fainted when she got out of bed this morning."

"It hurts so much." Brooke mumbled as she moved her hand to her stomach.

"It's going to be okay, Brooke." Diane said as she brushed the hair out of Brooke's eyes. "You're going to be just fine."

Paul reached for his keys, quickly kissed his wife and ran toward his car so he could help his son. He opened the back door and helped Julian lay Brooke down. Julian slid in next to her as his father put the car in reverse and tore out of the driveway.

Paul broke nearly every law and disobeyed every speed limit sign on the way to the hospital. He didn't know what was going on with Brooke but he knew something was very wrong as she was drifting in and out of consciousness. His son was scared and no matter how hard he tried to hide it Paul could still see how terrified Julian was. "Dad," He heard him say. Paul glanced up and looked at the rearview mirror to see Julian staring at him with tearstained cheeks. "She's pregnant."

Paul felt his heart drop. His foot pressed down harder on the gas if that was even possible. Julian felt the car lurch forward and in that moment he realized how real the situation was.

x-x-x-x

They sat side by side and didn't say a word. Julian had his head in his hands and Paul was counting ceiling tiles in order to keep his mind busy. All Julian wanted to do was call Nathan, Haley, Lucas, and Peyton. They would know what to do. They would know how to handle this. They would know what to say to make him feel better. He couldn't get the image of his lifeless wife being wheeled down the hall on a stretcher out of his head. The nurses were yelling for doctors. The doctors were calling for surgeons. That couldn't have been a good sign.

"Mr. Baker?"

Both Julian and Paul looked up to see an older woman in a white coat standing before them. They immediately rose to their feet. "I'm Brooke's husband," Julian said. "How is she?"

"Brooke suffered an ectopic pregnancy. There was nothing we could do."

Paul found the doctor's tone and demeanor extremely inappropriate given the news she had just delivered. He was about to say something when he heard Julian ask a question.

"What's an ectopic pregnancy?" His voice was void of emotion.

"The embryo attached to her fallopian tube instead of inside her uterus. This is actually more common than you would think since it occurs in one out of fifty pregnancies. I'm sorry Mr. Baker."

Julian ran a hand through his short hair. "Why ours? Why her?"

The doctor shrugged. "Sometimes it runs in the family but Brooke would have known if it did and she would have discussed it with her OB."

"Can I see her?"

"Hers is the second room on the left whenever you're ready." The doctor said as she nodded down the hallway in front of them before turning to leave.

"What am I going to do?" Julian asked his voice barely above a whisper. "How am I supposed to tell her the baby she was picking out names for this morning is gone?"

Paul slung his arm around Julian. "You're going to kiss her and hold her and tell her that you love her. Nothing else matters right now. There are no words to make this better, son. I wish there were but nothing you say to her is going to take away the pain she's feeling right now."

Julian nodded at his father's words. He knew he was right, nothing he said or did was going to take away the pain Brooke was feeling. He smiled weakly at Paul before making his way toward his wife's room.

She was curled on her side staring out the window when he entered her room. It took all he had inside of him not to break down at that very sight of her. In two strides he had crossed the room and carefully climbed into the bed with her. She somehow seemed smaller in his arms, like he could sense that the baby that was growing inside of her was gone. "I'm sorry." She said her voice barely above that of a whisper.

He pressed a kiss behind her ear. "It wasn't your fault. The doctor said these things happen. You didn't cause this."

"I was supposed to keep our baby safe for nine months. I was supposed to protect him or her and I couldn't even last two—"

"Stop." He begged. "It was beyond your control, the embryo attached where it wasn't supposed to so nothing you did or didn't do caused this."

She closed her eyes and silent tears spilled down her face. Julian rested his head gently on her shoulder as he squeezed her hand.

"When can I go home?"

"Later this afternoon, the doctor wants to observe you for a few more hours and then you should be good to go."

She nodded at his words as she tried to keep her tears at bay. She had to be strong no matter how badly she was breaking on the inside.

x-x-x-x

"Momma! Daddy!" Olivia exclaimed when she saw Brooke and Julian enter the house later that afternoon with Paul lagging behind them. "Where were you?"

"I had to take mom to the doctor's office this morning. She wasn't feeling too well." Julian explained as he crouched down to his daughter's level. He watched Brooke smile weakly at the little girl before retreating up the stairs toward their bedroom. Diane reached for Paul's hand and he pulled his wife into his strong embrace. They had never seen Brooke so broken. From the moment they met her she had been so bubbly and full of life and to see her like this was painful.

"Go be with Brooke." Paul said as he placed his hand on his son's shoulder. "We'll take care of Olivia."

"Are you sure?" He asked. "You wouldn't mind?"

Paul shook his head. "You need to be with Brooke right now."

x-x-x

He knocked softly on their door before entering the bedroom. He found her curled up in a ball, her back toward him but he knew she was crying. In three strides he crossed the room and climbed into their bed. He pressed his body up against hers and wrapped her in his arms and flinched when he felt her shy away from his touch.

"I don't understand."

Her voice was low and emotionless.

He picked his head up. "What baby? What don't you understand?"

She had hardly said anything since she had passed out earlier in the morning and Julian was worried. He would do anything to keep her talking because the last thing he wanted was for her to shut him out.

"The baby was fine yesterday." She said as she swatted at the tears that were falling down her face. "We heard the heartbeat at the ultrasound and the doctor said everything looked good. How could everything change so fast?"

He didn't know what to say. She was right, how did everything change in an instant? Less than eight hours ago his life was perfect and now the baby he was so excited to meet was gone. Several things ran through his head as to what to say to his wife to make her feel better but they were all lies. Nothing he would say would take away the pain and hurt both of them were feeling so he remained silent and gently pulled her body closer to him.

x-x-x

He was thankful that the sedative the doctor had given her had taken effect so quickly. She looked peaceful as she slept something he knew she wouldn't be for a long time. As he retreated downstairs he reached for his cell phone to call the people he'd been wanting to call all day.

Fifteen minutes later Nathan, Haley, Lucas and Peyton were sitting in the living room waiting for Julian to stop pacing and explain why he had called.

Haley sighed. "Are you going to tell us what's going on?"

"Where's Brooke?" Nathan asked as he looked around for the bubbly brunette. "Did she take Olivia out for the day?"

Julian shook his head. "She's upstairs sleeping." He replied. "She's had a rough day."

Haley and Peyton glanced at each other after picking up on Julian's tone. Something had happened. Something bad.

"Brooke was pregnant."

"Was?" Lucas asked.

Julian nodded. "She suffered an ectopic pregnancy this morning. We lost the baby." He cried as he slid down against the wall, his hand covered his eyes as he sobbed for the first time that day.

The four of them didn't know what to do. They all glanced at each other unsure of how to react until Haley made her way towards Julian. Lucas, Nathan and Peyton watched as she got down on the floor with him and wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders. None of them had ever seen Julian cry and to see him do so was too much for Peyton. She got up and made her way to the kitchen and Lucas followed.

"Hey," He said.

"Why did this have to happen, Luke?" She asked as she stared out the kitchen window. "Why did this have to happen to them?"

He wrapped Peyton in his arms and held her tight. "I don't know." He said honestly.

"They don't deserve it." She mumbled against his chest. "They've both been through so much and now this."

"I know." Lucas agreed.

Peyton looked up at him. "I don't know how much more Brooke can take before she breaks."

He could see the panic and terror in his wife's eyes as she spoke. "She's the strongest person I know, Peyt." He assured her. "She's going to be okay."

"What if she's not?" Peyton asked. "What do I do then? She's my best friend…I'm supposed to make this better."

x-x-x

They heard the soft patter of feet on the stairs and moments later Brooke appeared in the living room. Haley and Peyton had managed to compose themselves but the second they saw their best friend, tears flooded their eyes.

"We're so sorry, Brooke." Haley said as both she and Peyton made their way toward the brunette and enveloped her in a hug.

Julian's eyes met his wife's and all he could see was hurt and pain looking back at him.

"You told everyone?" She asked in disbelief.

Julian nodded.

"Why?"

"Because they should know, Brooke, they're family." He responded. "You didn't want me to?"

She shook her head and wrapped her arms around her middle as Julian made his way toward her. "I didn't want anyone to know." She said trying her hardest to keep her tears at bay. "No one knew I was pregnant before today. No one would have known that I lost the baby."

Lucas, Nathan, Haley and Peyton began to feel uncomfortable, like they shouldn't be in the room while Julian and Brooke talked about what had happened. They tried their best to avoid eye contact with Brooke since it would make the situation even more uncomfortable if they got up and left right then and there.

Julian eyed his wife. "They're our best friends—"

"I don't care Julian!" She exclaimed. "No one needed to know besides you!"

"Why—"

"Because it's embarrassing, Julian!" That was all it took for the tears she had tried so hard to keep from falling to spill out of her eyes. "Do you know how embarrassing it is that I couldn't keep our child safe for longer than two and a half months? That I _lost_ our child? That I—"

"It's not your fault, Brooke." He told her forcefully. "You didn't cause this to happen."

"Everyone keeps telling me that; you, the doctors, your mom and dad and that doesn't make me feel better. That doesn't get the thoughts out of my head of what could I have done differently to prevent this? No one has a reason for why this happened to me, to our baby, to us and that is so unbelievably hard to accept."

"I know." He said softly.

She looked over his shoulder and saw her friends still sitting on the couch. She had completely forgotten that they were still there and felt bad that they were all sitting there uncomfortable. "I'm sorry," She said. "You guys can go."

They all stood and hugged Brooke gently before leaving. They had told her multiple times to call if they needed anything at all.

"Is it wrong for me to be so upset?" She asked as she slid down against the front door after their friends had left.

He cocked his head at her question.

"I was only two and a half months pregnant. No one could tell. I didn't have a bump or anything. To the outside world our baby didn't even exist." She reasoned.

He sat down beside her and reached for her hand. "Our baby existed to us."

"I know but it's not like I was six or seven months along and lost the baby. Should I have been this attached?" She looked down at her stomach and laid her hand across it.

"I would have been worried if you weren't."

She gently laid her head on his shoulder. "I love you."

He kissed her tenderly. "I love you too." He whispered against her lips. "And whenever you're ready we'll try again, no rush."

"I don't know if I want to."

x-x-x

Review please!


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